# How common is post-menopause polyandry? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 20, 2015, 10:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914 "2015-12-20T10:46:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![DrCube](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a3d4f5/32.png) [@DrCube](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrCube)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2015, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/21 "2015-12-21T22:27:32Z")
> [@WF\_Tomba](#): > > How many people do you actually know who live in this sort of arrangement? My girlfriend’s grandma, who died in 2013, apparently had a pair of boyfriends for 20 years or so after her husband died in 1976. One of her boyfriends was married, and his wife dated the other guy, too. I imagine this stuff happened a lot, but was rarely mentioned outside of the circle. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2015, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/22 "2015-12-23T08:25:57Z")
I’m wondering how many of those people had it going on for years, pre-menopause. A prominent politician from my hometown sort of meets the OP’s description, but she’s been the vertice of a V for decades. The arrangement was already in place when I was in high school and she was in her low 30s at the time. ---
**Author:** ![mistymage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mistymage/32/459_2.png) [@mistymage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mistymage)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2015, 8:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/23 "2015-12-23T08:49:31Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > In that case, I’d be even less inclined. Old guys are all falling apart - who needs that??? 😉 Seriously, tho, among my older, unattached friends (we’re all late 50s, older 60s) the women seem to be quite content without and men in their lives. Even the one who, as a young woman, always had lots of guys around her. Granted, it could just be that we all have similar attitudes and that’s why we’re friends. I’ll preface this by stating I have known no polygamous couples unless you count a pair who had sex with anyone as long as drugs were included. But… I could see an older woman having multiple older men as her gentlemen callers. They tend to only be good for one or two visits a week 😃 I’m “only” 45 but as much as I liked sex as a teen, a 20something, 30something and now… Yeah, no.. my hubby wouldn’t be into _that_ even if he did have a strange dream about bringing home a second younger wife about a decade ago. I told him I hoped she liked doing housework. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2015, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/24 "2015-12-24T05:52:22Z")
> [@Quartz](#): > > A number of people I know are involved in such relationships, where an older woman lives with or very close to a coterie of male companions with whom she has sex. All are very happy with the situation and none are harem-like (in all cases all participants are economically independent). How common is this arrangement? If a women is attractive enough, even if older, she may be able to pull this off, but it seems like an atypical scenario since older men do not lack (demographically) for available older women. Maybe if she is a very sexual and skilled hottie this would be a thing, but it would (I think) be uncommon. Is there something about Scottish culture that would promote these kinds of hookups? I kinda-sorta had the impression Scottish people were bit reserved and conservative in these things. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2015, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/25 "2015-12-24T08:04:49Z")
That’s what they WANT you to think… ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2015, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/26 "2015-12-24T13:12:59Z")
We’ve all heard the joke about Angus the sheep-f\*\*\*er. What us 'Merkins never realized is that “sheep” is really a code-word meaning sexy grandma. Angus was just one of many young men. The lady Scots be doin’ it large. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ac8455/32.png) [@Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Your_Great_Darsh_Face)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2015, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/27 "2015-12-24T14:45:20Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > I have no clue on your question. But … > > As people get older, the men die off earlier on average and the women become an ever-increasing majority as everyone ages. I’ve heard rather the opposite situation to the OP occurs in most retirement communities, independent living places, etc. > > At age 70-mumble there are, e.g., 5 single women for each single guy. Many of these guys do better with the ladies than they ever did in college. But, on the other hand, they’re getting lucky with incontinent arthritic septuagenarians. I mean, sex is great and all that, but I can see where I’d be wanting to grow old gracefully. ---
**Author:** ![TheFaerie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c57346/32.png) [@TheFaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheFaerie)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2015, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/28 "2015-12-24T16:53:54Z")
I have a married, poly, post menopausal friend who has several boyfriends/guys she dates. But it’s not real common among my poly friends. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2015, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/29 "2015-12-24T19:41:52Z")
> [@Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](#): > > I mean, sex is great and all that, but I can see where I’d be wanting to grow old gracefully. Sorry, but I’m wanting to grow old **dis** gracefully. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2015, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/30 "2015-12-25T14:00:23Z")
> [@Your\_Great\_Darsh\_Face](#): > > But, on the other hand, they’re getting lucky with incontinent arthritic septuagenarians. > > I mean, sex is great and all that, but I can see where I’d be wanting to grow old gracefully. When I was 20 in college my idea of acceptable ages to date was 18 to 22. Now that I’m in my late 50s it’s 12 to 68. The way I see it, the odds on my getting a date have skyrocketed! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cub\_Mistress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea666f/32.png) [@Cub\_Mistress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cub_Mistress)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2015, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/31 "2015-12-25T23:30:47Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > When I was 20 in college my idea of acceptable ages to date was 18 to 22. Now that I’m in my late 50s it’s 12 to 68. The way I see it, the odds on my getting a date have skyrocketed! 😃 12? Really?:dubious: ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2015, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-common-is-post-menopause-polyandry/740914/32 "2015-12-25T23:53:26Z")
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