# How Commonplace Is Bathroom Reading? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 5, 2012, 11:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493 "2012-01-05T11:28:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/61 "2012-01-08T13:29:07Z")
I stock the bathroom with 1940’s-50’s magazines (discards from the library)-it alwys cracks me up to read decades-old news-sorta puts things in perspective. ---
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/62 "2012-01-08T13:47:24Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Word. > > Ayup! > > I’m another Mom-who-hides-in-the-bathroom-with-a-book. > > Unfortunately, there is a serious side effect to this lifetime habit. Now I can’t move my bowels without reading. I can feel like I have to go, even to the point of cramping and pain, but I’ve cross wired the “lateral movement of the eyes” and “poop” nerves. Hence the shampoo bottles. Or, in an emergency, I have to scan the bathroom tiles, left to right, as if I were reading words. Holy Crap! You too? ---
**Author:** ![orderfire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/orderfire/32/10908_2.png) [@orderfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/orderfire)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/63 "2012-01-08T14:19:58Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > Ahh, the timeless prose of Mssrs. Procter and Gamble: > > “Lather. Rinse. Repeat.” Dr Bronners provides hours of reading enjoyment. Dilute! Dilute! All one! ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/64 "2012-01-08T14:43:40Z")
> [@Gagundathar](#): > > Holy Crap! You too? I honestly thought I was the only one! ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/65 "2012-01-08T16:33:03Z")
My Dad used to read magazines while seated on the throne. He said it was the only place in the house with really good light. Me, I can afford lamps with real bulbs in them. I never read on the can. ---
**Author:** ![Isaacedwardleibowitz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ecb155/32.png) [@Isaacedwardleibowitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isaacedwardleibowitz)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/66 "2012-01-08T16:34:51Z")
At my house we have a stack of old Mad magazine issues from the 70s next to the toilet. It makes using the bathroom a lot more fun. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/67 "2012-01-08T17:04:03Z")
Okay, I guess this is the time and place to clear up a lifetime mystery for me. I go to the bathroom when I have to _go_. I sit down, I poop, I leave. I couldn’t even read two sentences while I’m there. You _readers_, what is it that is actually happening? Are you waiting to start? Is it coming out real slow? Is there a break half way through? I have no objection whatsoever to bathroom reading (we have five bathrooms), but help me understand. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/68 "2012-01-08T18:24:57Z")
> [@](#): > > help me understand. I grew up in a family of five people. My father read on the pot. He had bowel issues. At any rate, if I read in any other room in the house, one or both of my parents were likely to get on my case and tell me to do some chore or other. As long as I was in the bathroom and nobody else was pounding on the door, though, I had a nice quiet place to read, and nobody disturbed me without cause. Theoretically, the house had two bedrooms, and we converted the den into a third bedroom when my brother was old enough to need a bedroom of his own. It only had the one bathroom, though. When I was a teen, we moved into a three bedroom three bathroom house. Even if I hadn’t had this background, though, I’d still have to read on the pot. I have irritable bowel syndrome, which means that I frequently have diarrhea or constipation. Either way, it might take me quite a while to take care of business. Reading helps me relax and takes my mind off the pain. ---
**Author:** ![Pops1963](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9de053/32.png) [@Pops1963](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pops1963)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2012, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/69 "2012-01-09T05:54:31Z")
Wow, Irony can be pretty ironic sometimes, just finished up with some ahem,“quality library time” But I also enjoy a cold beverage while in there.:eek: ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2012, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/70 "2012-01-09T11:43:05Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > Okay, I guess this is the time and place to clear up a lifetime mystery for me. I go to the bathroom when I have to _go_. I sit down, I poop, I leave. I couldn’t even read two sentences while I’m there. You _readers_, what is it that is actually happening? Are you waiting to start? Is it coming out real slow? Is there a break half way through? I have no objection whatsoever to bathroom reading (we have five bathrooms), but help me understand. I’m really not sure what there is to understand. Yes, I developed the habit because my mom was much like **Lynn Bodoni** ’s parents. While she encouraged me to read in theory, in reality seeing me comfortably snuggled up with a book meant she’d find some chore for me to do. As for the mechanics: I walk in, drop trou and, pretty much before butt hits porcelain, I’ve picked up the book that sits on the counter next to the toilet. I’m peeing, I’m reading, I’m peeing…by the time I’m done peeing, I’ve read at least two paragraphs. If that’s all the biological functions I have to do and my kids aren’t driving me to hide, I replace the bookmark or dogear the page, put the book back, wipe, wash hands and leave. If I have to have a bowel movement, that’s a page or two waiting for all the sphincters to open in the right order and peristalsis to do its thing, by which time, I’ve become engrossed a bit more in what I’m reading. So I keep reading until a) my ass gets cold and/or sore or b) my youngest simply can’t stand it anymore and starts whimpering outside the door or c) I begin to feel guilty for hiding in the bathroom too long or d) I wonder if there’s anything new and exciting happening on the SDMB. Now…I do read quickly. A standard paragraph takes about 5 seconds, while a pee takes about 15. Maybe that’s the difference between bathroom readers and non bathroom readers? I also don’t read anything too complicated in there, because I’m reading it in little bits and pieces. My current bathroom book is [Peter and the Shadow Thieves](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_and_the_Shadow_Thieves), which is representative. ---
**Author:** ![lawoot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/35a633/32.png) [@lawoot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lawoot)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2012, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/71 "2012-01-09T14:00:58Z")
I’ve been a bathroom reader as long as I can remember. Maybe mom used to give me a book to look at while I was potty training, and the habit just stuck… Usually I have a book that I just leave for reading in the bathroom, and another by my bed for reading there. And a third that I carry with me to read when I get a spare moment or two. I’ve been known to whip out a book in a slow drive-thru line, even. ---
**Author:** ![Toxylon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f05b48/32.png) [@Toxylon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toxylon)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2012, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/72 "2012-01-11T12:40:58Z")
Growing up and well into adulthood, I never read in the bathroom, even though my sisters did. I was a power-pooper, pushing out a perfect log in mere seconds, my mind already on the go as I was reaching out for the little-needed paper. This all changed gradually after I moved in with my wife, who has probably never sat on a toilet without a magazine in hand. I eat much less carbs (and fiber) than I used to and walk a fraction of the daily mileage I once did, and no longer power-poop. I also have two small kids, and quiet me-time is a scarce commodity. So I’ve picked up the habit of always reading while taking a dump, which makes me feel old and a bit boorish. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2012, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/73 "2012-01-11T13:10:06Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > **[COLOR=“brown”]I used to read books and magazines in the bathroom. Now I take my iPhone in with me and surf the web. And yes, I’ll post to the Dope while I’m in the bathroom, too.** This post has been browned by the … the … nevermind.[/COLOR] ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2012, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/74 "2012-01-11T13:15:55Z")
I read in the bathroom extensively, but then you know, I’m having an actual _bath_. ---
**Author:** ![Cayuga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Cayuga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cayuga)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2012, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/75 "2012-01-11T17:10:39Z")
While I was working my way through this thread, one of the dogs came up and let me know he had to go out. I wonder if they’re reading out there. Nope, just barking. ---
**Author:** ![Cayuga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@Cayuga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cayuga)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2012, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/76 "2012-01-11T17:18:51Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > Okay, I guess this is the time and place to clear up a lifetime mystery for me. I go to the bathroom when I have to _go_. I sit down, I poop, I leave. I couldn’t even read two sentences while I’m there. You _readers_, what is it that is actually happening? Are you waiting to start? Is it coming out real slow? Is there a break half way through? I have no objection whatsoever to bathroom reading (we have five bathrooms), but help me understand. I also go to the bathroom when I have to _go_. I sit down, I poop, I leave. Well … I wipe and I leave. On a good day it take 30 seconds. On a bad day, a couple of minutes. What am I gonna do, concentrate on my technique? Stare at the toilet paper roll on the wall across from me? To be honest, I don’t get the book thing, either. But I’ve always had magazines in the bathroom. Used to be _People_ (pace, Jeff Goldblum’s character), now it’s _Entertainment Weekly_. Heck, even a good, long, pee (I drink a lot of coffee) can take 30 or 45 seconds. That’s a whole magazine page. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2012, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/77 "2012-01-11T18:04:43Z")
For me, it’s not so much that I take something in with me to read while I’m performing my meditations as it is that I’m already reading something and I take it with me. Length of time in the bathroom isn’t the reason I have reading material with me, I’m just not letting the need to go interrupt my reading. I don’t read at work, I don’t read while driving, and I can’t read in the shower or when asleep, but those are the only times you can \*guarantee \*I’m not reading. I read for pleasure, and I keep reading while doing things like walking to and from school (as a kid), cooking, cleaning, brushing my teeth, or, yes, visiting the bathroom. ---
**Author:** ![perfectparanoia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a5b964/32.png) [@perfectparanoia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/perfectparanoia)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2012, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/78 "2012-01-11T19:24:33Z")
I cannot poop without reading material. Maybe I can’t relax enough? The event itself is fairly quick so I tend to read bathroom readers or magazines or comics but I get bored before I am done (even if it only takes a few seconds). Mind you, I am constantly needing something to occupy me so maybe it’s an A-type thing? ---
**Author:** ![Kizarvexius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/da6949/32.png) [@Kizarvexius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kizarvexius)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2012, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/79 "2012-01-11T21:13:36Z")
I have a hefty word and phrase origin dictionary permanently stationed in the loo. During each routine visit I flip to a random page and try to learn a thing or two. ---
**Author:** ![3\_20\_59\_or\_bust](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/47e85d/32.png) [@3\_20\_59\_or\_bust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3_20_59_or_bust)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2012, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493/80 "2012-01-11T23:20:27Z")
Well, as boys of a certain age know, the bathroom (especially at that first job or maybe at the single uncle’s house, visiting the older brother’s frat house) is always where the porn mags are laying around. So yeah, “reading” in there becomes second nature. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-commonplace-is-bathroom-reading/608493.md?page=5)