# How could Battlestar Galactica end badly? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 8, 2006, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666 "2006-10-08T00:43:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2006, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/41 "2006-10-11T03:28:29Z")
[QUOTE=brianjedi] Better yet: Edward James Olmos wakes up, and someone says “Justice Mendoza, President Santos is calling.” [/QUOTE] And he mumbles, “God, I’ve got to quit drinking.” ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2006, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/42 "2006-10-11T03:28:49Z")
The hot cylon chick? Crying Game. ---
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2006, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/43 "2006-10-11T03:30:14Z")
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant] And he mumbles, “God, I’ve got to quit drinking.” [/QUOTE] “I’m not saying he’s not a drinker, I’m saying he doesn’t drink.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2006, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/44 "2006-10-11T19:40:28Z")
The Galactica reaches Earth and finds it populated by leopards, tapirs and chimps. Adama leaves a monolith behind on an African plain, buries another on the Moon, and the ragtag fugitive fleet sails on. Or… Apollo finds an enormous, gray, perfectly smooth monolith and flies into it and through a bizarre light show, eventually dying in a chilly hotel room, all alone. Then he is turned into the Star Child and destroys all Cylons everywhere in the Universe with a single thought. Roll credits. Starbuck realizes that if she just refines her Tuning technique, she can turn Cylons into powder. A new sun rises, she meets Apollo on a dock overlooking a lovely harbor, and they all live happily ever after. A writers’ strike causes the series to be cut short just as they’re about to find the Earth. They encounter the Borg and are all assimilated. Admiral Cain persuades Adama and his crew to join the Maquis. Apollo lets Starbuck and her boyfriend use the letters of transit to leave Casablanca forever. ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2006, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/45 "2006-10-11T23:43:19Z")
**Elendil’s Heir** , thanks to you, now I have this visualization of Tom Hanks from “The Terminal” being from Caprica. Of course, this is accompanied by the airport security guy demonstrating what has happened to Caprica by smashing his bag of chips with an Optimus Prime toy. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2006, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/46 "2006-10-12T04:12:00Z")
[QUOTE=Raguleader] **Elendil’s Heir** , thanks to you, now I have this visualization of Tom Hanks from “The Terminal” being from Caprica. Of course, this is accompanied by the airport security guy demonstrating what has happened to Caprica by smashing his bag of chips with an Optimus Prime toy. [/QUOTE] Just another free service I offer. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2006, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/47 "2006-10-12T08:00:00Z")
The Cylons reach their preprogrammed 4-year lifespan. “All those seasons lost, like Tyrol in the rain. Time…to die.” ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2006, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/48 "2006-10-12T13:52:08Z")
Galactica reaches earth only to find that a Cylon is already governor of California. They Cylons, who can apparently detect a nuclear detonation, through a nebula, light years away (?) reach earth first after picking up a detonation on the Korean peninsula. Cylons: should have used Eveready! ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2006, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/49 "2006-10-12T17:51:51Z")
Final Scene: Kara Thrace stands in a white dress next to a tuxedoed Leoben Conoy, an interfaith priest on the altar. Fat Lee Adama appears on the balcony above screaming “Kara! Kara!” “Leeeeeeeeee!” Kara wails. They make a mad dash for the door, Lee staving off an enraged Brother Cavil and Three by slashing the air in front of them with the Arrow of Apollo. Using the Arrow to bar the doors, they flee on foot, and hop a bus. Their elated laughter gives way to angst, as their old, gnawing doubts project a future of deep uncertainty… ---
**Author:** ![Lightray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightray/32/391_2.png) [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2006, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/50 "2006-10-12T20:45:33Z")
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant] 2) Apollo is playing on the other team. [/QUOTE] What, like Apollo dumps Dualla to start doin’ it with Helo? I don’t see how _that_ could be a bad ending. At least not as bad as Baltar hearing Jimi Hendrix music in his fantasyworld and meeting Dirk Benedict, who tells Baltar that he, Dirk Benedict, is both the Cylon god and the only god there is. Fade to black. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2006, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666/51 "2006-10-12T21:01:16Z")
Ben Cartwright wakes up out of a sound sleep, sits up, and looks across the campfire at Little Joe and Hoss, and says, “Boy, I just had the weirdest dream…” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-could-battlestar-galactica-end-badly/375666.md?page=2)