# How do I deal with tipping waitstaff?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [November 2, 2013, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923 "2013-11-02T14:19:17Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Septima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Septima)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/1 "2013-11-02T14:19:17Z")
Not sure if this is GQ or IMHO, but people seem adamant that there is, in fact, one true answer to this, so…
Anyway, as I’ve said in far to many threads lately, I’m going to America (Florida). I’ve been once before, but I was a teenager at the time, and wasn’t paying for my own meals at restaurants. I’d like to _not_ be the stereotypical rude scandinavian restaurant patron, if I can avoid it.
I’m from a largely non-tipping culture. We’ll round up to the nearest pretty number, and maybe leave a bit extra if the server has been really wonderful or we’ve been a PITA, but not tipping is the standard (full time waitstaff are paid a living wage here. In fact, the word for tips is “drinking money”, which neatly sums up the attitude to tipping).
So, what do I do? What is the standard tip for an average waitperson? A great waitperson? A bad one? Does the type of restaurant matter? Does the complexity of the order matter? The size of the party? In short, how can I treat people decently without being a clueless buffoon? I realize that a lot of american waitstaff depend on tips, so even though I personally think it sounds like a borderline exploitative wage system, I don’t want someone to go home broke because of me.
In short, school me in the ways of tipping, please. I’m all ears.
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### Author:  [@James\_Toothpaste](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/James_Toothpaste)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/2 "2013-11-02T14:21:17Z")
I always give a 15 percent tip to a good waiter. Once I didn’t tip because my service was terrible (really really terrible) but yeah.
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### Author:  [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/3 "2013-11-02T14:33:46Z")
I’ve gone up to 20% because I can afford it and waiting is often a lousy job.
There’s enough variance in individual’s habits that nothing you do will be out of line. (Unless you leave nothing or worse, a penny to indicate how mad you are.) Just pick a percentage and add it to the bill. Many restaurants are now giving several percentages pre-calculated to your total as “suggestions”. Tips are usually pooled in any case so that the bussers and other staff get included, so a reward to an individual get shared.
That’s really all there is to it. There are no ways. Unless the waiter saves you with a Heimlich maneuver, it’s all the same all the time.
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### Author:  [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/4 "2013-11-02T14:39:30Z")
Just pick any amount? what the hell?
15% is the standard.
20% and up for excellent service.
10% or less means there was something wrong.
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### Author:  [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/5 "2013-11-02T14:42:53Z")
In bars, $1 a drink is the norm.
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### Author:  [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/6 "2013-11-02T14:43:32Z")
Note that if you’re in a “large party,” which typically means 6-8+ depending on the restaurant, they’ll automatically add about an 18% tip to your bill. This will usually be written on the menu somewhere. In these cases, you may pay exactly the check.
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### Author:  [@saje](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saje)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/7 "2013-11-02T14:49:20Z")
I do 20% generally unless the service was extra good or extra bad.
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### Author:  [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/8 "2013-11-02T15:00:41Z")
> [@Septima](#):
>
> So, what do I do? What is the standard tip for an average waitperson? A great waitperson? A bad one? … In short, how can I treat people decently without being a clueless buffoon?
No one will look at you funny if you tip 15 or 20 percent. 1 dollar per drink is fine at a normal bar (assuming you’re paying cash per drink - if you have a tab, just do the normal 15 or 20 percent).
If the food is bad, don’t take it out on the waiter /waitress. If the service is bad, feel free to tip anywhere from 0-15 based on how poor it is. If the service is really good, there isn’t a need to go over 20, but you can (although anything above 30 percent is a little odd).
> [@Septima](#):
>
> Does the type of restaurant matter? Does the complexity of the order matter? The size of the party?
Not really on the type of restaurant, but if the meal is super cheap, try to leave at least a few bucks. If the order is complex and they take care of you, go closer to 20. If the server gives you anything for free, take care of them (two instances, if the restaurants comps you for something, make sure you tip on the what the bill should have been - a free steak shouldn’t lower the server’s tip. If the server is sneaking you a few drinks, give them a buck or so extra per drink in the tip).
If you go with a large party, a tip may be included in the check - it will say so on the bill if this is the case. If it is, you don’t need to tip extra, but can.
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### Author:  [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/9 "2013-11-02T15:04:06Z")
My wife tells me I tip waitresses more than waiters.
I’d never thought about it that way before, but I figure it has something to do with boobs.
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### Author:  [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/10 "2013-11-02T15:13:46Z")
> [@Hello\_Again](#):
>
> Just pick any amount? what the hell?
>
> 15% is the standard.
>
> 20% and up for excellent service.
>
> 10% or less means there was something wrong.
That may be standard for you, but it’s just not standard for many people, maybe most people. Some people always tip 20%, some always 10%, some 12% or 18% or 25%. Some vary it all the time. There is no standard, only individual preferences.
And nobody sees the tip until you’re out of the restaurant. If you’re never going back there, what do you care what they think? Tipping is make yourself feel good, not the waiter, except for those rare cases in which you’re a regular. And that doesn’t apply to a foreign visitor.
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### Author:  [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/11 "2013-11-02T15:13:49Z")
> [@KneadToKnow](#):
>
> My wife tells me I tip waitresses more than waiters.
>
> I’d never thought about it that way before, but I figure it has something to do with boobs.
Your wife’s boobs are interfering with her ability to gauge how much you tip?
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### Author:  [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/12 "2013-11-02T15:16:27Z")
> [@Darth\_Panda](#):
>
> If the food is bad, don’t take it out on the waiter /waitress. If the service is bad, feel free to tip anywhere from 0-15 based on how poor it is.
If the food is “bad” you may want it fixed. If I order my steak rare, and it comes out well done, I send it back. In one situation I asked the owner to taste what I’d been served (there was something hideously wrong). She was mortified, replaced the dish, and comped us our meals.
If the service is awful, I pay the check, leave no tip, and never return.
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### Author:  [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/13 "2013-11-02T15:33:16Z")
Around here, typical is $1 per drink if you’re at a bar ordering beers or cocktails, and 18-20% of the bill at a restaurant. That’s creeped up a bit. I remember in the late 80s and 90s, 15% being the standard around here, but now I see 20% being used as the number by most my peers these days.
If you seen any of the tipping threads around here, you’ll see there can be quite a bit of controversy about this. Most people I know tip on the total bill, and either double the pre-tax subtotal or total and move the decimal place over (to get 20%. Pre-tax vs post-tax is an argument in itself, but it’s not that big a deal.) Where it can get argumentative is do you tip food and alcohol together at a restaurant, or calculate alcohol tips differently? Most people I know do it on the total bill. But there is an argument that if I’m, say, buying a $100 bottle of wine to go with my dinner, is that really worth $20 in tip? So some people say you tip per bottle separately. Or something like that. I don’t bother worrying about it and just to the 20% straight across.
So, long story short, 15% of the bill should be okay; 10% will be seen as a bit cheap; 20% is fairly typical where I’m at. I also think it varies by area. It seems to me that large urban centers have slightly higher standards of tipping.
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### Author:  [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/14 "2013-11-02T15:34:34Z")
> [@Septima](#):
>
> Not sure if this is GQ or IMHO, but people seem adamant that there is, in fact, one true answer to this, so…
Who is adamant about that? :dubious:
I think you’ve gotten some good advice. Your Scandinavian method is OK for self-serve places like coffee shops or whatever, and no one tips at McDonalds, but at a sit down restaurants, the “standard” is 15% +/- depending on the service. If you leave less than 15%, the server will most likely think he or she did something wrong. But really, there is no one size fits all, and you’ll probably tip more at Uber-High-Class-LA-Restaurant than you will at Denny’s in the middle of Iowa.
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### Author:  [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/15 "2013-11-02T15:34:48Z")
> [@Darth\_Panda](#):
>
> Your wife’s boobs are interfering with her ability to gauge how much you tip?
😃
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### Author:  [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/16 "2013-11-02T15:36:46Z")
> [@kayaker](#):
>
> If the food is “bad” you may want it fixed. If I order my steak rare, and it comes out well done, I send it back. In one situation I asked the owner to taste what I’d been served (there was something hideously wrong). She was mortified, replaced the dish, and comped us our meals.
> If the service is awful, I pay the check, leave no tip, and never return.
Yeah, I’d agree with that. But in the meal comped scenario, I’d still tip the server on what the bill would have been, assuming they handled it appropriately.
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### Author:  [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/17 "2013-11-02T15:42:11Z")
Moved to IMHO.
Colibri
General Questions Moderator
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### Author:  [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/18 "2013-11-02T15:43:19Z")
Pretty much what everyone else has said. Also, note all of this only applies in restaurants where your food is brought to you; there’s no generally tipping at places where you order your food at a counter and take it away yourself, e.g. McDonalds, Subway, etc.
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### Author:  [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/19 "2013-11-02T15:50:44Z")
> [@Exapno\_Mapcase](#):
>
> That may be standard for you, but it’s just not standard for many people, maybe most people. Some people always tip 20%, some always 10%, some 12% or 18% or 25%. Some vary it all the time. There is no standard, only individual preferences.
“Standard” in this case doesn’t mean standard for an individual, it’s what’s standard on average. In most threads I’ve seen, the majority opinion is in the range **Hello Again** stated - mine certainly is. And even if you don’t accept that as a standard, we can use the percentage that restaurants typically add for large parties, which in my experience is about 18% - splitting the difference between a tip for average and excellent service.
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### Author:  [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)
#### Post date: [November 2, 2013, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-deal-with-tipping-waitstaff/672923/20 "2013-11-02T15:55:07Z")
> [@Leaffan](#):
>
> Pretty much what everyone else has said. Also, note all of this only applies in restaurants where your food is brought to you; there’s no generally tipping at places where you order your food at a counter and take it away yourself, e.g. McDonalds, Subway, etc.
However, increasingly one sees “tip jars” on the counter in such places (though perhaps not in the largest chains).
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