# How do I get regular (possibly TMI)? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 21, 2005, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152 "2005-11-21T22:15:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![LionelHutz405](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lionelhutz405/32/536_2.png) [@LionelHutz405](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LionelHutz405)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2005, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/21 "2005-11-22T20:02:32Z")
> [@Priceguy](#): > > Mainly that I keep close track of my weight, which is kinda randomish now since the intervals between evacuations are so variable. I wouldn’t bother screwing around with your diet just for this. Just accept that your weight varies by a bit depending on ummm… if you are currently full of it or not. What are you hoping to gain by tracking your weight so closely? ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2005, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/22 "2005-11-22T22:19:00Z")
> [@cowgirl](#): > > Fruit and veggies (do you really get 6 servings a day? Really? Be honest …) Yes I do. I’m 100% honest. > [@LionelHutz405](#): > > What are you hoping to gain by tracking your weight so closely? Oh, I’m just anal. I really enjoy verifiable, hard results that can be measured and put into spreadsheets. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2005, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/23 "2005-11-22T22:35:13Z")
> [@Priceguy](#): > > Oh, I’m just anal. It certainly seems so! 😉 > [@Priceguy](#): > > I really enjoy verifiable, hard results that can be measured and put into spreadsheets. :eek: That’s not where it goes, man! ---
**Author:** ![PinkMarabou](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@PinkMarabou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PinkMarabou)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2005, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/24 "2005-11-22T22:55:15Z")
Mine are very touchy too. I would not suggest my method, as this is only temporary. Two cigarettes and a large cup of coffe will send me running to the bathroom. And I have IBS with constipation, severe constipation. Like the smallest bit of stress or change in schedule can stop me up for days. If you want an easy fix, take Milk of Magnesia pills every night before bed. They are very tame and work wonders. No cramps, no painful bloating and gas. If this doesn’t help, talk to your doctor about it. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to go to the emergency room for chest pain and found out I was stuffed to the max. It sucks living this way, but the only thing you can do is try out different methods and see which works best for you. Good luck! ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2005, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/25 "2005-11-22T23:14:43Z")
Bran muffins are a good idea for breakfast. [http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/find/results?search=bran+muffin&x=0&y=0](http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/find/results?search=bran+muffin&x=0&y=0) ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2005, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/26 "2005-11-22T23:20:06Z")
> [@Priceguy](#): > > Oh, I’m just anal. I really enjoy verifiable, hard results that can be measured and put into spreadsheets. You don’t want your results to be too hard; that can cause pain or even rectal fissures. Extra fiber will help to ensure that they are firm but not too hard. ---
**Author:** ![MadPansy64](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@MadPansy64](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MadPansy64)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/27 "2005-11-23T00:47:41Z")
> [@fetus](#): > > I see **Nimue** , who drinks Lactaid, is in Maryland. I haven’t seen a carton of the stuff since I lived in Maryland, so it may be an east coast thing–but at Giant, Safeway etc. back there you can find it and the equivalent store brands pretty easily. I don’t know whether it’s actually harder to find here or I haven’t looked, honestly. I’m a hardcore Lactaid junkie. Well, actually, I’m a lactose intolerant milk product junkie. Chuck, Charlie. Lactaid and DairyEase (?) are readily available west of the Mississippi. Some stores place them in the Tummy Trouble section, some in the little right smack in front of the pharmacy, and a few have a display by the milk cooler. If you don’t see them, ask a clerk. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/28 "2005-11-23T01:14:18Z")
> [@MadPansy64](#): > > I’m a hardcore Lactaid junkie. Well, actually, I’m a lactose intolerant milk product junkie. Chuck, Charlie. > > Lactaid and DairyEase (?) are readily available west of the Mississippi. Some stores place them in the Tummy Trouble section, some in the little right smack in front of the pharmacy, and a few have a display by the milk cooler. > > If you don’t see them, ask a clerk. Personally, it’s not a problem for me because I’m not lactose-intolerant. But for whatever reason when we lived in Maryland (I was in elem. school) my mother always bought Lactaid. AFAIK she isn’t lactose-intolerant either, so I don’t know what that was about. ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/29 "2005-11-23T02:31:00Z")
> [@fetus](#): > > Personally, it’s not a problem for me because I’m not lactose-intolerant. But for whatever reason when we lived in Maryland (I was in elem. school) my mother always bought Lactaid. AFAIK she isn’t lactose-intolerant either, so I don’t know what that was about. Perhaps she liked the sweetness of it? ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/30 "2005-11-23T03:03:01Z")
> [@Harimad-sol](#): > > Perhaps she liked the sweetness of it? Perhaps. None of us has ever really drank a lot of milk straight up though; just with cereal. (Grr…fricking public keyboard with a broken comma key!) ---
**Author:** ![Nimue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d26b3c/32.png) [@Nimue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nimue)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/31 "2005-11-23T16:47:32Z")
> [@fetus](#): > > Personally, it’s not a problem for me because I’m not lactose-intolerant. But for whatever reason when we lived in Maryland (I was in elem. school) my mother always bought Lactaid. AFAIK she isn’t lactose-intolerant either, so I don’t know what that was about. Man, I wouldn’t buy it if I didn’t have to. It’s almost double the price of regular milk. I’m afraid I don’t have any experience of looking for it in other states. But when I was living abroad in Scotland, it was not readily available. (Which isn’t that surprising, since it’s northern Europeans who have the least amount of trouble with it.) The only kind of lactose-reduced milk I could find was sold in little cardboard cartons like UHT milk, and tasted pretty nasty. When I lived there, I either drank soy milk or simply avoided milk in large quantities. (Like I said, I can take a small amount, like in a cup of tea, without problems.) ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2005, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152/32 "2005-11-23T18:31:19Z")
**Priceguy** wonders: > [@](#): > > So, how do I turn my innards into a Swiss watch? and **Brynda** opines: > [@](#): > > …digital stimulation… Absolutely not!!! No genuine, high quality Swiss watch is digital. Perish the thought! Nay, **Priceguy** , the real answer is to eat 7 diamonds, 9 rubies, and a sapphire. In time you, like a good Swiss watch, will have a 17 jewel movement [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-regular-possibly-tmi/332152.md?page=1)