# How do I get rid of my squirrel problem?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-rid-of-my-squirrel-problem/350840>\
**Category:** Factual Questions\
**Created:** [April 1, 2006, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-rid-of-my-squirrel-problem/350840 "2006-04-01T14:11:37Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 2

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\
**Post date:** [April 4, 2006, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-rid-of-my-squirrel-problem/350840/21 "2006-04-04T01:56:09Z")

</div>

> [@pkbites](#):
>
> Then you don’t really have a problem yet. An annoyance maybe, but not a problem.
> 
> They’re cute until they eat a hole into your house and get in your attic, basement, or into the walls where they eat wiring, rip up insulation, shit, f\*ck, reproduce, die, rot, stink, and generally make the biggest God damn mess you ever saw.
> 
> _THEN_ you’ll be back here asking how you can get your hands on a bazooka as you’d rather blow your house up than share it with them sonsabitches! Trust me, I’ve been there!☹

Abso-frickin-lutely correct.

Cuteness ends where home consumption begins.

Try laying in bed listening to a rodent gnaw your eaves. Or the pitter patter of little paws back and forth, back and forth, above your head, back and forth, _back and forth, BACK AND FORTH, **GAAAAAAAA!!!** _

_ **DIE! DIE! DIE NOW!! ARRGGHHH! DIE! DIE! DIE!! DYEEEEEEEEE!!!** _

: pant, pant, pant ::

Squirrels. God, I hate 'em.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![slaphead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@slaphead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slaphead)\
**Post date:** [April 4, 2006, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-rid-of-my-squirrel-problem/350840/22 "2006-04-04T16:26:22Z")

</div>

> [@Zsofia](#):
>
> I like the little guys! I just don’t like them all up in my vegetable garden

Clearly these are not Evil Nazi Squirrels.

Yet…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\
**Post date:** [April 4, 2006, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-rid-of-my-squirrel-problem/350840/23 "2006-04-04T17:01:44Z")

</div>

What about something like [these](http://www.greenhousekit.com/guarden.htm)?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\
**Post date:** [April 4, 2006, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-rid-of-my-squirrel-problem/350840/24 "2006-04-04T18:21:33Z")

</div>

Well, that’s actually kind of what I have going with the raised bed thing, but the thing is I need tall trellises for my beans and cucumbers and tomatoes and melons, and trying to rig netting (not plastic - things would cook!) over them is driving me nuts. It keeps on being too small.

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-get-rid-of-my-squirrel-problem/350840.md?page=1)