# How do I keep my bed from squeaking? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [November 23, 2004, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290 "2004-11-23T15:45:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![keeper0](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@keeper0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/keeper0)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/1 "2004-11-23T15:45:02Z")
Since finding true love, happiness and co-habitation, my bed has ceased to be a place of only quiet repose. But, now during amorous moments, the bed squeaks loudly. Besides the distraction factor, there are also times when discretion is preferred. Short of ceasing such activities, is there a way to eliminate or reduce the squeaking? I presume the culprit is the connection between the metal bed frame and the headboard, but I could be wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/2 "2004-11-23T16:46:28Z")
Well, for starters you should completely strip the bed and remove the mattress and get right down to the frame. Then carefully tighten every bolt, adding lock-washers if need be. Or consider branching out your recreational activities to the bathtub or kitchen table. ---
**Author:** ![spingears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@spingears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spingears)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/3 "2004-11-23T16:46:29Z")
> [@keeper0](#): > > the bed squeaks loudly. I presume the culprit is the connection between the metal bed frame and the headboard, but I could be wrong. Lubricate it with bar soap applied to points of contact between any and all movable surfaces. ---
**Author:** ![RumMunkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b19c9b/32.png) [@RumMunkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RumMunkey)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/4 "2004-11-23T16:56:59Z")
> [@](#): > > Lubricate it with bar soap applied to points of contact between any and all movable surfaces. > Today 11:46 AM The _ **bed** _… lubricate the _bed_. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![spingears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@spingears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spingears)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/5 "2004-11-23T17:05:28Z")
> [@RumMunkey](#): > > The _ **bed** _… lubricate the _bed_. 😉 **That’s KY not SOAP!** ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/6 "2004-11-23T17:33:29Z")
Squeaking is usually because of springs somewhere. Cheap and old mattresses squeak. Mattresses resting on springs squeak. For the latter, people have used plywood. For the first, new better mattressses. ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/7 "2004-11-23T20:20:45Z")
> [@keeper0](#): > > Since finding true love, happiness and co-habitation, my bed has ceased to be a place of only quiet repose. Does your g/f have any good friends who could join you? Explain to her that the added weight of one extra female will certainly stop the squeaking. You are welcome. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![MelCthefirst](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eada6e/32.png) [@MelCthefirst](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MelCthefirst)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/8 "2004-11-23T21:08:40Z")
Ours is one of those Swedish slat beds and they squeak now. I don’t think they used to, so it must have developed after much use. What is bar soap? ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/9 "2004-11-23T21:11:58Z")
> [@MelCthefirst](#): > > Ours is one of those Swedish slat beds and they squeak now. I don’t think they used to, so it must have developed after much use. > What is bar soap? Bar soap is soap in a cake or bar form. As for your squeaking, you might try a strip of foam cushioning along the place where the slats join with the bed frame. Of course I’d just consider the squeaking the “song of love” and hope that the squeals of joy help to hide those sounds. ---
**Author:** ![LordVor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/90ced4/32.png) [@LordVor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LordVor)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/10 "2004-11-23T22:14:39Z")
You’ve really got to find the source of the squeek. Squeeks either come from worn-out springs, in which case there’s nothing to do but replace, really, or from two pieces of your bed rubbing together. You have to stop the two pieces from rubbing together, by either tightening bolts, or stuffing something like newspaper or foam rubber or something in between the two parts, so they don’t rub together directly anymore. -lv ---
**Author:** ![MelCthefirst](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eada6e/32.png) [@MelCthefirst](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MelCthefirst)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/11 "2004-11-23T22:19:51Z")
> [@ShibbOleth](#): > > Bar soap is soap in a cake or bar form. > As for your squeaking, you might try a strip of foam cushioning along the place where the slats join with the bed frame. > > Of course I’d just consider the squeaking the “song of love” and hope that the squeals of joy help to hide those sounds. Thanks, I thought it must have been some kind of special soap used in bars. I guess we just call it ‘a bar of soap’? Having heard a number of flatmates and, yes, the parents (happy place, happy place), I enjoy sex more if I know others can’t hear us. At the mo this is not a problem, but I’ve started wondering if the neighbours can hear the squeaks as we share a wall. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/12 "2004-11-23T22:27:48Z")
If you have bedposts it might not be a bad idea to cover the bulb parts with something soft. Or attach pads to the back wall where they would hit. ;j * * * True Blue Jack ---
**Author:** ![LorieSmurf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a587f6/32.png) [@LorieSmurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LorieSmurf)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/13 "2004-11-24T00:19:21Z")
by an air mattress and do it on the floor. ---
**Author:** ![Oat1957](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Oat1957](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oat1957)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/14 "2004-11-24T00:24:45Z")
> [@LorieSmurf](#): > > by an air mattress and do it on the floor. I’ll have this blown up in a few minutes. While I’m blowing this up how’s about…😃 ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2004, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/15 "2004-11-27T15:18:56Z")
The above was for an additional problem that sometimes happens. The suggestion below makes it irrelevant. For the squeaking part: Why not just throw the mattress off the bed onto the floor if you have space? It saves on buying an air mattress for this sole purpose, as others have suggested you do. If you already have an air mattress, it’s a moot point. * * * True Blue Jack ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2004, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-my-bed-from-squeaking/276290/16 "2004-11-27T15:26:45Z")
> [@LordVor](#): > > You’ve really got to find the source of the squeek. Squeeks either come from worn-out springs, in which case there’s nothing to do but replace, really, or from two pieces of your bed rubbing together. You have to stop the two pieces from rubbing together, by either tightening bolts, or stuffing something like newspaper or foam rubber or something in between the two parts, so they don’t rub together directly anymore. > > -lv Only problem with your solution is that it requires a third party to go squeak searching while the parties of the first and second part are united in coital gymnastics, a situation some find to be off-putting. Now if the squeak searcher is cute and all are agreeable to her reward… 😛