# How do I keep thieves out of my yard?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-thieves-out-of-my-yard/339051>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [January 8, 2006, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-thieves-out-of-my-yard/339051 "2006-01-08T22:02:18Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Page:** 5

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**Author:** ![slaphead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@slaphead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slaphead)\
**Post date:** [January 14, 2006, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-keep-thieves-out-of-my-yard/339051/81 "2006-01-14T16:38:56Z")

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> [@Zsofia](#):
>
> But _then_ what? Would I have to feed him? Entertain him? What does Chuck Norris eat, anyway, and how do I get rid of him?

Keep refreshing [this](http://www.4q.cc/chuck/) page and eventually the answers to your questions will come up…

Anyhow, I second the prickly hedge option. Hawthorns, roses, prickly pear, whatever. Most people won’t risk their skin or their clothes to steal plastic flamingoes, and vegetation is generally less grim-looking that razor wire. If you don’t want to buy hundreds of plants you could just set up a few short (3-foot or so) posts, string plain wire between them and train rambling roses along the wires. Might take a couple of years to get complete coverage but it should give people the general idea that your yard is private property without looking like a penitentiary

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