# How do I look after my goatie?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [August 14, 2005, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954 "2005-08-14T11:58:10Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 13\
**Page:** 2

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\
**Post date:** [August 15, 2005, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/21 "2005-08-15T17:41:22Z")

</div>

> [@Baldwin](#):
>
> I’m searching my memory, trying to think of somebody, anybody, who looks better with a goatee than he would either clean-shaven or with a full beard.

I tried to grow the standard mustache and goatee a few years ago, but I couldn’t get them to connect on the sides of my mouth, and the hair on my upper lip irritated the hell out of me. So now I have one of those thin strips that starts at the bottom lip, goes down an inch or two, then gets wide and covers the whole chin, AKA a real goatee. I accidentally had my trimmers set to 1 instead of 9 a few months ago, so I shaved the rest off completely. I looked 16 instead of 26. I hated it, and immediately grew it back out.

Incidentally, almost everyone who’s commented on it has told me I look a lot better with it than without it. Anyone who’s hated the way it looks on me but hasn’t commented has been duly ignored. 😉

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\
**Post date:** [August 15, 2005, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/22 "2005-08-15T17:51:01Z")

</div>

> [@Tuco](#):
>
> To the people who say I shouldn’t have a goaty - I’m trying to look a bit older as people still treat me like a kid, [here](http://img354.imageshack.us/img354/3259/tuco6qq.jpg) is a pic of me to help you decide, though I now have shorter hair and smaller glasses.

If you grow your hair longer and lose the glasses then you stand a good chance of looking like [Mr. Pink](http://www.gonemovies.com/WWW/WanadooFilms/Misdaad/Pink2.jpg).

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\
**Post date:** [August 15, 2005, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/23 "2005-08-15T22:42:36Z")

</div>

I’d still go for a full beard. They’re less maintenance and less… hmm… affected (though the less maintenance is why I prefer them- I shave a couple of times, drag the trimmer over my face, and that’s that. Your face would probably look good with one of those beards that’s slim along the jawline and fuller at the jowls.

As for trimmers, there really isn’t a lot of difference. The more expensive ones I’ve bought tended to have a few more accessories (like moustache combs and attachments) that I never used anyway. As long as it’s adjustable then get a cheap one. If it breaks after a few months then toss it and get another one and you’re still ahead of the hounds.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\
**Post date:** [August 15, 2005, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/24 "2005-08-15T22:43:54Z")

</div>

The above should have read “I shave a couple of times **a week** ” (as opposed to with a goatee, when I had to shave my cheeks daily).

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\
**Post date:** [August 15, 2005, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/25 "2005-08-15T23:05:40Z")

</div>

What you want, my friend, isn’t a goatee (or a goatie), but a van dyke. Goatee is just the chin, van dyke is the chin plus mustache.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\
**Post date:** [August 15, 2005, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/26 "2005-08-15T23:42:48Z")

</div>

> [@ShibbOleth](#):
>
> It’s **goatee**.  
> :: wanders off muttering about goats ::

Well, he might look goatie!! 😛😛😛

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\
**Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/27 "2005-08-16T00:01:32Z")

</div>

You might look good in one. [My Friend](http://www.vegetus.org/vegtoon/shaggy.gif) here does.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\
**Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/28 "2005-08-16T00:03:50Z")

</div>

> [@Tuco](#):
>
> My only problem is I have no idea how I’m supposed to look after it!

The same way everyone looks after a goatie. Like scientists just thawed you out after being burried in ice since 1993.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\
**Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/29 "2005-08-16T06:17:53Z")

</div>

> [@FilmGeek](#):
>
> What you want, my friend, isn’t a goatee (or a goatie), but a van dyke. Goatee is just the chin, van dyke is the chin plus mustache.

Oh, let’s not even get started on the terminology. I’ve had one for about six years, settled on what I have four years ago, and I STILL don’t know what kind it is. I think the terms are changing too, and Van Dyke used to mean something more specific.

Incidentally, there must be hundreds of online clubs offering goatee maintenance tips. [Here is a page that attempts to tell you what kind you have.](http://www.beardshampoo.com/BeardTypes1.html)

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\
**Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/30 "2005-08-16T14:52:35Z")

</div>

> [@Baldwin](#):
>
> I’m searching my memory, trying to think of somebody, anybody, who looks better with a goatee than he would either clean-shaven or with a full beard.

Cardinal Richelieu.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\
**Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/31 "2005-08-16T15:02:31Z")

</div>

> [@Barely Adequate](#):
>
> Goatees are wonderful for concealing a weak chin, thus having the added benefit of making it easier to change pillow-cases… 😛

Brilliant!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\
**Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/32 "2005-08-16T15:16:48Z")

</div>

> [@ouryL](#):
>
> You might look good in one. [My Friend](http://www.vegetus.org/vegtoon/shaggy.gif) here does.

Zoinks!!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![nonacetone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nonacetone/32/2819_2.png) [@nonacetone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nonacetone)\
**Post date:** [August 16, 2005, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954/33 "2005-08-16T19:04:50Z")

</div>

My husband will be getting all his hair cut off next Saturday. His hair, at the moment, is quite long. Almost down to his butt.  
He’s getting something called a ‘flat top’ (which he says is a ‘military’ type thing, although, I have NO idea).  
He turned his beard into a goatee this past Sunday evening.  
I’m stressing over this change.  
I suppose I’ll live, though.  
It is, after all, his hair.

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-i-look-after-my-goatie/316954.md?page=1)
