# How do people "disappear?" **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 8, 2026, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477 "2026-02-08T00:08:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![doreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/858c86/32.png) [@doreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doreen)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2026, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/21 "2026-02-08T19:03:57Z")
That kind of depends on what you mean by “disappear” . Are we talking about I don’t want my family to find me or the police are looking for me because I’m a suspect in a crime or do I want to play dead so my family can get the life insurance money/I don’t have to pay the credit cards? Because the first one is not hard at all - I take whatever money I can out of the bank ,I move to a place that I have no connection to , I get a place to stay, I change my address with SS, get a new driver’s license if needed. There’s a decent chance I won’t even need to change my name. SS is not going to tell my family where I live , the police won’t look for me if there aren’t signs of foul play/cognitive issues. If there seems to be foul play and they look for me and find me, the most they will do is tell my family I’m OK if I don’t want to be found. ---
**Author:** ![Al128](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/al128/32/16541_2.png) [@Al128](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Al128)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2026, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/22 "2026-02-08T21:17:54Z")
[Got a wife and kids in Baltimore, Jack I went out for a ride, and I never went back Like a river that don’t know where it’s flowing I took a wrong turn, and I just kept going](https://genius.com/1521827/Bruce-springsteen-hungry-heart/Got-a-wife-and-kids-in-baltimore-jack-i-went-out-for-a-ride-and-i-never-went-back-like-a-river-that-dont-know-where-its-flowing-i-took-a-wrong-turn-and-i-just-kept-going) Chances are if you keep your own credentials, you show up somewhere on the internet, pretty soon - some authority with public records, etc… ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2026, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/23 "2026-02-08T21:32:56Z")
My brother, the pain in the ass, simply dropped off the radar for several years. > [@engineer\_comp\_geek](#): > > > [@XOldiesJock](#): > > > > you can’t get a job or do practically anything else without a Social Security card or some kind of legal identification > > Oh, sure you can. There are plenty of jobs that pay cash under the table. That’s presumably what my brother, the pain in the ass, did when he simply went off radar for several years around the new millennium. The family figured he either overdosed or finally mouthed off to the wrong person, until he showed up at my sister’s place in Texas. He had disappeared like that before, first taking his ten speed to the West Coast after graduating high school; came home for a few weeks then went off biking around Europe. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan\_myers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@aruvqan\_myers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan_myers)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2026, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/24 "2026-02-08T21:35:48Z")
My sister, brother and I all got our SSN issued the same time, when I was born my dad was getting his duty station changed to Germany, so all 3 of us got them. I actually know all 3 because they are sequential, xxx-xx-1234, 1235, 1236 [not the actual numbers obviously] and oddly my sister and I looked enough alike that I could have used her ID to vanish with if she hadn’t passed on at 6 from leukemia. If I wanted to vanish as a female - if I were younger, I would hook up with a man or woman [I don’t judge, both if you want for all i care] and live with them - all the household expenses and such in their name = work under the table cleaning houses for people for money. I would also go somewhere I would never normally go - like Houston TX or Miami FLA for me [2 places I absolutely detest] as an older woman, perhaps hooking up with an older partner and working under the table. As a male, the whole hooking up for a place to stay is not as easy but might be possible. I think what trips up a lot of people is they can’t just let go of friends, family or hobbies [if you are into model trains frex, while a reasonably popular hobby, it does mark one place to look for you, or I mmorpg, so online gaming would be my downfall =)] ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2026, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/25 "2026-02-09T00:50:39Z")
The Internet has made the whole world a small town. ---
**Author:** ![Sigene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df788c/32.png) [@Sigene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigene)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2026, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/26 "2026-02-09T01:11:36Z")
This woman disappeared for 62 years. [Wisconsin woman missing nearly 63 years was found "alive and well," police say - CBS News](https://www.cbsnews.com/news/wisconsin-woman-missing-nearly-63-years-found-alive-well-police-say/) She just left, didn’t tell anyone where she was going and didn’t contact anyone. I’m sure this can be done even today. You can legally change your name and take on a new life and I expect continue with your career and social security number and payments. Only people who would have access to private court records like your name change or access to your social security account would be able to find you. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2026, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/27 "2026-02-09T01:40:48Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > Maybe just hop on a sailboat and head for a mostly uninhabited island?? There’s usually a reason mostly uninhabited islands are mostly uninhabited - lack of resources, which makes it difficult for a newcomer to just sail into the harbour one day and disembark. ---
**Author:** ![ricepad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b38774/32.png) [@ricepad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ricepad)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2026, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/28 "2026-02-09T02:56:10Z")
I know of a guy that deserted from the US Army and changed his name to something very close to a name in popular culture. Imagine how easy it’d be to hide in plain sight (at least in sight of Google) if you adopted the name “Mike Jordan”. He did something very similar. I don’t know how he’s getting around the requirement for a SSN, but I do know he has an online presence showing an occupation - if you know how to look for him. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2026, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/29 "2026-02-09T03:19:06Z")
There are degrees of disappearing. If all you want to do is leave where you are and not communicate with anyone, and change your name but keep your SS number, that is not that difficult. There are private detectives, however, who make a career of finding people (usually for the collection of debts, or for criminal reasons) who would probably be able to find you. I don’t know how they do it, I suspect some of them have illicit contacts in the SSA or law enforcement (or maybe a credit bureau), people who can find your SS number and search for recent activity. Evading them would involve, I think, considerably more difficulty. So it depends on how badly someone wants to find you, if they are willing and able to pay for that kind of search. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2026, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/30 "2026-02-09T03:36:14Z")
It sounds like that woman spent most of that time basically hiding in plain sight. I’ve gone looking for a few people who I believe may be using one of those “delete my existence from the Internet” services, especially because there was also no evidence that they were deceased, something that I also found out a few times. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2026, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/31 "2026-02-09T17:50:59Z")
> [@engineer\_comp\_geek](#): > > Oh, sure you can. There are plenty of jobs that pay cash under the table. > > A lot of them are manual labor jobs. You can cut lawns, shovel snow, work as a handyman, all sorts of things. You can sell crafts. You can buy things for cheap from yard sales or fish them out of the trash (if they aren’t too badly broken or can easily be fixed) and sell them online. Anything that you can think of where you are working for someone else for cash, and are not employed by a company. You can even make yourself up a cardboard sign and beg at traffic intersections or shopping centers. But where are you going to live? In a lot of places you can’t rent an apartment or get utilities unless you have government issued ID. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2026, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/32 "2026-02-09T17:56:11Z")
You live with a friend or partner. You make a friend and live with them or sublet. You couch surf. You join an informal house/pet-sitting group. You buy a van for cash and live in a van. You camp on the playa. ---
**Author:** ![mixdenny](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mixdenny/32/2962_2.png) [@mixdenny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mixdenny)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2026, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/33 "2026-02-10T19:18:07Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > This part I question. Isn’t it pretty difficult to sell stuff online without some kind of bank account/equivalent to handle the money transactions? You can sell on Craigslist which is local with cash payment. ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2026, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/34 "2026-02-10T20:28:21Z")
How do these invisible people get medical care? ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2026, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/35 "2026-02-10T21:27:51Z")
The same way poor people do. They mostly don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2026, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/36 "2026-02-10T21:46:47Z")
> [@mixdenny](#): > > > [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > > > This part I question. Isn’t it pretty difficult to sell stuff online without some kind of bank account/equivalent to handle the money transactions? > > You can sell on Craigslist which is local with cash payment. Read the very next paragraph in my post. ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2026, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/37 "2026-02-13T18:57:30Z")
> [@StarvingButStrong](#): > > Assuming you’re not too burdened with scruples…. mightn’t it be easier to take over someone else’s existence? There was one time in Grad School where I was moving into a new place, a rooming house where no one else knew me. I had a rental truck filled with all my stuff, and it occurred to me: someone could kill me, and take over my whole life, and it would probably be a couple of weeks or months before anyone could really figure out what happened. If I stopped showing up to class and other school-related things, most people would likely assume I’d just dropped out, that sort of thing happened from time to time. None of my family lived near my school, so they wouldn’t expect to see me any time soon. Similarly, none of my pre-university friends lived near me. ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2026, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/38 "2026-02-13T19:04:38Z")
The plot of “The Talented Mr. Ripley." ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2026, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/39 "2026-02-13T19:48:41Z")
Don’t ERs have a duty of care, regardless of whether or not you have insurance? ---
**Author:** ![doreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/858c86/32.png) [@doreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doreen)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2026, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477/40 "2026-02-13T20:56:30Z")
Only if it’s an actual emergency situation - you won’t generally get treatment for chronic conditions in an ER. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-people-disappear/1027477.md?page=3)