# How do you address a nun? (NAF) **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [March 15, 2009, 8:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508 "2009-03-15T08:33:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/41 "2009-03-16T03:11:05Z")
> [@alphaboi867](#): > > Technically they’re married to Jesus/God/the Church. I’ve heard that expression before; however, it’s not correct. They are not married. They have taken vows, one of which is to be celibate and another one is to dedicate their lives to Christ. ---
**Author:** ![Caveat\_lector\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@Caveat\_lector\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caveat_lector_1)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/42 "2009-03-16T03:21:13Z")
> [@Alan\_Smithee](#): > > However, **MissMorie** noted that some prefer NOT to be called that. I wouldn’t use it until I’ve been assured that it is her preferred form of address. Maybe I’m alone here, but it seems to me that when it comes to addressing nuns one doesn’t know the proper form of address to use yet, “Mother Superior” jumps the gun. If I was meeting someone I knew to be a Mother Superior, Abbot, or Archabbot I would address them as such with the reasoning that it is less likely to offend as few people get offended by someone giving them their formal title, but some might be offended by you not doing this. Now I’d not go around calling random nuns Mother superior though. ---
**Author:** ![iwakura43](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de0a6/32.png) [@iwakura43](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iwakura43)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/43 "2009-03-16T05:44:09Z")
Nuns are addressed just like any other parcel–zip+4 preferred. The hard part is sticking on all the stamps. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/44 "2009-03-16T05:45:55Z")
I’ve never heard the expression, _Reverend Mother_\*, but have heard _Mother Superior_ quite often. To whom does each term apply? \*Actually, I’ve seen the term in print once before reading this thread and that was for the Episcopal Priest serving in the parish my parents attend. ---
**Author:** ![tr0psn4j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@tr0psn4j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tr0psn4j)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/45 "2009-03-16T05:58:01Z")
> [@psychonaut](#): > > I would address them as “Miss So-and-so”, just as I would in polite correspondence with any other unmarried women.. But isn’t a nun “married” to god? ---
**Author:** ![flodnak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/838e76/32.png) [@flodnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flodnak)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/46 "2009-03-16T07:21:13Z")
> [@missred](#): > > And when was the last time you saw one out of habit? :dubious: For the record, some orders of nuns no longer require habits. Already when I was in Katlick high school back in the '80s, several of the teacher nuns came to work in mufti. ---
**Author:** ![MissMossie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@MissMossie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissMossie)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/47 "2009-03-16T09:48:20Z")
It should be noted that in many communities the concept of “married to God” is no longer in vogue. The women I live with would consider themselves to have taken vows (obedience, fidelity to the monastic life, and stability for this order) to the entire community. [QUOTE=Chronos] An abbot doesn’t need to send anyone off to be ordained; he can do it himself. An abbot is for almost all purposes equivalent to a bishop, just with a relatively small community. This also implies that all abbots are priests: A non-priest leader of a monastery would necessarily be a prior. [/QUOTE] You are, of course, correct. I should have been clearer. I was thinking more of the formation process that goes along with becoming a priest rather than the ordination itself. ---
**Author:** ![Ruken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f475e1/32.png) [@Ruken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruken)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/48 "2009-03-16T12:59:03Z")
“Firstname Lastname”, “Firstname”, or “Friend” suffices for myself and most other Quakers I know. > [@tim314](#): > > So should we assume that if you’re called before a judge, you also refuse to say “your honor”? While **Colibri** understandably does not wish for a debate, I feel I am answering factually in stating that it suffices for judges, the POTUS, etc. Nothing newfangled about it or terribly unusual about it IME. ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/49 "2009-03-16T13:29:40Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > Aren’t nuns, by definition, never married? Then why would “Ms.” be appropriate? I think of “Ms.” as an ambiguous title to use when the distinction between the unmarried “Miss” and the married “Mrs.” is to be not revealed, not desired, or not important. Well, there’s no way to know if a nun has ever been married–she could have been widowed. ---
**Author:** ![SanVito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sanvito/32/2805_2.png) [@SanVito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanVito)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/50 "2009-03-16T13:44:30Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > Aren’t nuns, by definition, never married? Then why would “Ms.” be appropriate? I think of “Ms.” as an ambiguous title to use when the distinction between the unmarried “Miss” and the married “Mrs.” is to be not revealed, not desired, or not important. Well, firstly, as Manda Jo points out, Nuns can certainly have been married and widowed. But most importantly, the entire point of using ‘Ms’ is that women should not be defined by their marital status, just as men aren’t. It’s called equality of the sexes. ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/51 "2009-03-16T14:49:55Z")
Off the subject I guess, but what does NAF mean? ---
**Author:** ![ClintPhoenix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b9bd4f/32.png) [@ClintPhoenix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ClintPhoenix)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/52 "2009-03-16T15:04:12Z")
> [@kayT](#): > > Off the subject I guess, but what does NAF mean? That it might be an interesting thread: “Need Answer Fast” ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/53 "2009-03-16T15:16:09Z")
> [@A\_Dodgy\_Dude](#): > > I went to Catholic school for eight years and the only thing I ever called any of the nuns was “sister,” i.e., Sister Cecelia, Sister Ann, Sister Elizabeth, etc. > [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > In a pinch, “Ma’am” might suffice. I agree. If you feel the sting of a ruler, you got it wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Caveat\_lector\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@Caveat\_lector\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caveat_lector_1)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/54 "2009-03-16T16:24:58Z")
> [@Monty](#): > > I’ve never heard the expression, _Reverend Mother_\*, but have heard _Mother Superior_ quite often. To whom does each term apply? > > \*Actually, I’ve seen the term in print once before reading this thread and that was for the Episcopal Priest serving in the parish my parents attend. Mother Superior and Reverend Mother seem to be (from my quick checks) alternate names for the same thing. I’m going to take a guess and say that which you might use may very by order or just by preference of the person being spoken too. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2009, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/55 "2009-03-16T21:13:01Z")
Thanks everyone! I have the application form in my sticky paws. ---
**Author:** ![Walloon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/fbc32d/32.png) [@Walloon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walloon)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2009, 8:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/56 "2009-03-17T08:23:34Z")
I was at a funeral for an old friend of my family who was a nun. She had lived long enough that she had gone through several forms of address — all of which were used by speakers giving eulogies who had known her at different times of her life. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/57 "2009-03-18T00:40:55Z")
[Here](http://nodis3.gsfc.nasa.gov/displayDir.cfm?Internal_ID=N_PR_1450_010D_&page_name=AppendixE) is a NASA procedural requirment (like a regulation) that indicates a Mother Superior is to be addressed as _Reverend Mother_. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2009, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/58 "2009-03-18T01:56:59Z")
I would assume that a Mother Superior/Reverend Mother doesn’t go around wearing some identifying insignia displaying her rank, so shey may simply accept an address of “Sister” from someone who reasonably would know no better. ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2009, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/59 "2009-03-20T02:03:35Z")
> [@Caveat\_lector\_1](#): > > > [@Alan\_Smithee](#): > > > > However, **MissMorie** noted that some prefer NOT to be called that. I wouldn’t use it until I’ve been assured that it is her preferred form of address. Maybe I’m alone here, but it seems to me that when it comes to addressing nuns one doesn’t know the proper form of address to use yet, “Mother Superior” jumps the gun. > > If I was meeting someone I knew to be a Mother Superior, Abbot, or Archabbot I would address them as such with the reasoning that it is less likely to offend as few people get offended by someone giving them their formal title, but some might be offended by you not doing this. Now I’d not go around calling random nuns Mother superior though. A brilliant pun like that and _this_ is all the response I get? Maybe this place _is_ going down hill. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Caveat\_lector\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@Caveat\_lector\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caveat_lector_1)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2009, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508/60 "2009-03-20T02:14:20Z")
At the risk of seeming stupid…what pun? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-address-a-nun-naf/489508.md?page=4)