# How do you eat your Oreos? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 22, 2005, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729 "2005-07-22T23:35:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Susie\_Derkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Susie\_Derkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susie_Derkins)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2005, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/21 "2005-07-24T04:22:18Z")
You had me until Smarties. ---
**Author:** ![Uzi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/91b2a8/32.png) [@Uzi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uzi)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2005, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/22 "2005-07-24T04:27:07Z")
Okay, hold the Smarties and add whatever cookie/candy combo you’d like even more Reeses. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2005, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/23 "2005-07-24T04:30:52Z")
There’s no wrong way to eat an Oreo. ---
**Author:** ![Typically\_Sunday](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Typically\_Sunday](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typically_Sunday)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2005, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/24 "2005-07-24T06:27:59Z")
I’m ashamed to admit this but… I’m completely insane when it comes to eating Oreos. First off, Oreos must be eaten in threes. For the first one, I bite the oreo into a square eating the outside cookie parts and saving the cream in my mouth, then I eat the cream and eat the square. The second oreo, I eat one cookie half, scrape off the cream with my teeth (seriously, does anyone lick off the cream part? I don’t think it’s physically possible), then eat the remaining cookie half. The third one, I eat both cookie halves first, and then the cream. If I happen to have a fourth, it’s eaten whole. If I have marshmallows around the house, I’ll roast one, twist open a chocolate creme Oreo, insert marshmallow, reassemble and eat. Mmm… ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2005, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/25 "2005-07-24T15:29:21Z")
Open mouth. Insert whole Oreo. Chomp down. Swallow. Repeat until package is empty. That was the college-days version. Now I can only hack one row at a sitting before my tummy hurts. Being middle-aged is hell. ---
**Author:** ![Motorgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e36b37/32.png) [@Motorgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Motorgirl)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2005, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/26 "2005-07-24T15:32:47Z")
Stick a whole Oreo in my mouth, _carefully_ fill rest of mouth with cold milk. Let it sit for a little while until the cookie is mushy. Chew. Swallow. Yum. I look ridiculous, but it’s so tasty. ---
**Author:** ![available\_light](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@available\_light](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/available_light)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2005, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/27 "2005-07-24T19:36:00Z")
> [@FairyChatMom](#): > > My spousal unit sticks the tines of a fork into the middle so as to hold the cookie in a glass of cold milk till the bubbles stop. Then he snarfs it down. Oooooh, what a good idea! I’ll have to try that! I usually dunk them with my fingers until the bubbles stop, but I always end up with frozen fingers and if my grip slips I lose the whole cookie since it usually disintegrates if I try to retrieve it. I only crave oreos once in a while, but after reading this thread, I think I must go out and get some. ---
**Author:** ![wolf\_in\_second\_hand\_clothing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/9d8465/32.png) [@wolf\_in\_second\_hand\_clothing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_in_second_hand_clothing)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2005, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/28 "2005-07-24T20:04:51Z")
Does anyone remember that episode of _Futurama_ where Fry was eating those oreo-like cookies that had each cookie half and the cream individually wrapped, and he would unwrap each component, insert them in this machine that presses them together, then pull them apart, lick the frosting out, and throw away the cookies? I usually pull them apart and eat the frosting first, then the rest of the cookie or just eat them whole in one bit these occur in a roughly 2:1 ratio. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2005, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/29 "2005-07-24T22:40:15Z")
> [@Susie Derkins](#): > > Sounds like if **Podkayne** and **Anaamika** ever crave Oreos they should go in halvsies. Yeah, fine for me, but how is \*\*Podkayne \*\* going to feel about pre-licked cookies? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kniz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c37758/32.png) [@kniz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kniz)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2005, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/30 "2005-07-25T00:31:48Z")
This question reminds me of the one “Which hand do you wipe your ass with?” **The right answer is "Neither, I use toilet paper"** ---
**Author:** ![available\_light](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@available\_light](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/available_light)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2005, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/31 "2005-07-25T02:22:18Z")
> [@kniz](#): > > This question reminds me of the one “Which hand do you wipe your ass with?” > > **The right answer is "Neither, I use toilet paper"** Hmmm… “How do you eat your Oreos?” “Neither, I use toilet paper.” No…I’m not seeing it. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Only\_Mostly\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/f19dbf/32.png) [@Only\_Mostly\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Only_Mostly_Dead)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2005, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/32 "2005-07-25T04:21:05Z")
Pick up whole cookie, put in mouth, close mouth. Masticate until ready to swallow. Swallow. Repeat five or six times. I really don’t understand the fascination with getting fancy on twisting or dunking or any of that. -OMD, who ate his chocolate chip cookies today dipped in the cool-whip container. ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2005, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/33 "2005-07-25T04:39:31Z")
Dip whole cookie into glass of milk halfway until just soft. Bite off softened part. Repeat. Eat last non-soft chunk of cookie and wash down with a gulp of milk. I eat four Oreos at a time, no more, no less. Of course, this often means that when I go to get more in a day or so, my dad has scarfed all those left. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2005, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/34 "2005-07-25T14:03:21Z")
> [@kniz](#): > > This question reminds me of the one “Which hand do you wipe your ass with?” > > **The right answer is "Neither, I use toilet paper"** Unless you’re in (or from) India. ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2005, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/35 "2005-07-25T14:06:46Z")
I’ll freeze my Oreo’s first; then have them with a glass 'o cold milk. Or, in a bowl under a few scoops of ice cream, with a lil’ dash o’ milk to soften up the cookie part. ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2005, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729/36 "2005-07-25T14:11:26Z")
_ahem_ Quadruple Stufs. Two Double-Stufs, remove one cookie bit from each, mash together, and devour. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-eat-your-oreos/313729.md?page=1)