# How do you flirt? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 22, 2004, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482 "2004-04-22T19:06:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Rabid\_Squirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Rabid\_Squirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rabid_Squirrel)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/41 "2004-04-26T01:07:54Z")
I’m been hitting on a female acquaintance by alternatively spouting non sequiturs and insults. So far, the results are inconclusive. On the other hand, I have been accused of flirting when I’ve only been talking/joking with women I’m not interested in having a relationship with. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/42 "2004-04-26T03:01:28Z")
> [@nevermore](#): > > (sarcastic, masculine, laid-back but socially inclined fellows) WOW! Discirbes me to a “T”. If I’m ever in Austin, I might have to look ya up… 😉 There, that’s how I flirt… ---
**Author:** ![VarlosZ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d78d45/32.png) [@VarlosZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VarlosZ)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/43 "2004-04-26T03:34:09Z")
**1.** Stare at the ground. **2.** Mumble. **3.** Slink away. That’s just me, though. I wouldn’t reccomend this daring approach to novices. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/44 "2004-04-26T07:17:17Z")
I like to dicourse at length about my various neuroses and phobias. And, in the spring, my sinuses. ---
**Author:** ![Tir\_Tinuviel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@Tir\_Tinuviel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tir_Tinuviel)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 9:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/45 "2004-04-26T09:52:35Z")
> [@Giraffe](#): > > I breath through my mouth and stare at them intently. If they smile, I don’t smile back, but just keep staring. I lick my lips every few minutes. > > It never works. > [@Cyros](#): > > I just stand in the corner licking my eyebrows… 😃 **Cyros** beat me to it… ---
**Author:** ![phall0106](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phall0106/32/5934_2.png) [@phall0106](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phall0106)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/46 "2004-04-26T14:35:21Z")
> [@Cyros](#): > > I just stand in the corner licking my eyebrows… 😃 OH! :eek: …forget a paycheck… ---
**Author:** ![dook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cdc98d/32.png) [@dook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dook)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/47 "2004-04-27T05:26:19Z")
…if you pull up next to a cutie at a stoplight, crack your throttle with a quick flick of the wrist. Adjust your helmet. Offer her a mustache ride.\*\* [sub]\*\*this doesn’t generally work on crotch rockets because when you ride a crotch rocket you look like you’re humping your bike, and that’s just… eww.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![nevermore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a587f6/32.png) [@nevermore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nevermore)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/48 "2004-04-27T06:04:39Z")
> [@SHAKES](#): > > WOW! Discirbes me to a “T”. > > If I’m ever in Austin, I might have to look ya up… 😉 > There, that’s how I flirt… oh, is that right? well uh, hope ya like bite marks…and the occasional goat sacrifice [turnabout : you love it] ---
**Author:** ![Sengkelat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Sengkelat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sengkelat)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/49 "2004-04-27T07:21:22Z")
I stare at a woman until she looks my way, at which point I reflexively, without conscious control, look away. This repeats a few times, and I eventually realize that I haven’t been smiling, so I attempt to effect some sort of hideous grimace for the next few iterations. I’m pretty sure in some circles I’m known as “that creepy silent guy.” Occasionally I convince myself that I’m a red hot pillar of manliness and walk over to ask if I can sit next to her. Invariably, the answer is yes; doubtless she’s concerned that I might exhibit further psychotic behavior if denied, but very soon she remembers pressing business somewhere far away. If I actually manage to say something intelligible on the first try, the remainder of the conversation consists of me trying to think of something, anything, to say, and failing. I seem to be fairly successful with women who talk a lot; perhaps they think my tortured silence is me being a good listener. A friend of mine recommended sticking one’s platinum card to one’s forehead. I’ve never tried it, but I can’t imagine it’d be much worse than my current technique. ---
**Author:** ![manx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/65b543/32.png) [@manx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manx)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 8:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/50 "2004-04-27T08:01:54Z")
I am kinda geeky. And this is how I pick up geek-boys. ‘Waiiit… you read _Transmet_ too?’ Otherwise it’s the time-honoured techniques of glaring at them while they hit on my friends, and dropping my drink on them. Neither is a winner. ---
**Author:** ![Shade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@Shade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shade)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/51 "2004-04-27T13:38:56Z")
> [@](#): > > Me: “Hi you’re looking receptive, and judging from your body language now would be a good time to make a symbolic display of strength. Can I help you get the lid off that beer?”. I want to try this 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Scarf-Ace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Scarf-Ace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarf-Ace)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/52 "2004-04-27T17:25:08Z")
I don’t recommend it, but maybe if you can find a psychology student something might happen :). Probably something bad, but something… ---
**Author:** ![SkyClad72724](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/46a35a/32.png) [@SkyClad72724](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkyClad72724)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/53 "2004-04-27T22:34:29Z")
I live in a constant state of flirt (I’m guessing it has to do with my not-so-much-great luck with guys and continually watching my friends getting hit on in front of me like I don’t exisit) I totally agree with the acting like a 3rd grader thing - as long as the other party realizes your just messing with them. However, seeing as most of my friends act like 3rd graders on a regular basis… My flirting techniques deal with a lot of little touches and smart-alecky remarks. I just have fun and try to be myself. Flirting started working a lot better for me when I stopped trying to be something I wasn’t. Most people can tell when you’re being fake. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482/54 "2004-04-27T22:42:21Z")
> [@manx](#): > > Otherwise it’s the time-honoured techniques of glaring at them while they hit on my friends, and dropping my drink on them. Neither is a winner. Nice. I’ve always found women who flirt stupidly alot more hot than competent flirters. At least the stupid ones were willing to make themselves look bad to get my attention. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-flirt/241482.md?page=2)