# How do you have sex with your dog in the room? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 11, 2007, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512 "2007-01-11T04:51:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2007, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/41 "2007-01-11T20:43:19Z")
My dog has a terrible sense of jealousy and will start whining, barking, and nudging if we’re doing so much as kissing, so he’d have to go outside during anything more interesting. I don’t think he’s worried, just sees that attention is being paid to someone other than him, when this attention could so easily be lavished on him if he only reminded us that he was there. Cats seem much less interested, in my experience. Most of them seem only to want to sit at the foot of the bed and give you dirty looks for moving. One slightly awkward experience with cats, though; has anyone else here ever owned a cat who liked to headbutt you as a greeting? Just a friendly head-bump, which is cute, as long as it’s the correct head being bumped. ---
**Author:** ![Not\_a\_Platypus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d26b3c/32.png) [@Not\_a\_Platypus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Not_a_Platypus)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2007, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/42 "2007-01-11T21:14:45Z")
I don’t have dogs (wish I did), but 3 cats. They don’t sleep in my room anyway, or they keep me awake, and they definitely get booted out if sex is happening. Interested or not, I don’t like having critters in the room watching. Especially since one of my cats insists on crawling under the blankets if I do let her in. ---
**Author:** ![cowgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@cowgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cowgirl)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2007, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/43 "2007-01-11T21:32:36Z")
My dog appears to love naked people. Normally I never shut the bathroom door so he’s usually in there with me; when I shower he tries to stick his head into the tub, and I can’t have a bath with him in there because he licks whatever part of me is sticking out of the water. Whenever someone is shut in the bathroom he anxiously waits outside for the first chance to lick the first flesh he sees. My new BF loooooves the dog but is more than a little freaked out by the hungry look on his (the dog’s) face when he (the BF) steps out of the shower. The dog also licks the BF’s feet at every opportunity, which doesn’t go over well either. Suffice it to say, the dog is not allowed in the room when the show is on. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 11, 2007, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/44 "2007-01-11T21:40:12Z")
This is yet another reason for not getting in the habit of letting your pets sleep with you. We kick our cats out of the bedroom whenever we feel like it, and they might not like it much, but TFB - they ain’t paying the mortgage here. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/edb3f5/32.png) [@Freudian\_Push\_Up\_Bra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Push_Up_Bra)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/45 "2007-01-12T00:51:58Z")
My Dad’s first dog was a habitual licker - when my Dad was sitting down, the dog would lie under his legs and lick his ankles. My Dad is allergic to the oils on cats and dogs which is why we wash the dog every week or so, and as a result he’d get big rashes where the dog had repeatedly licked or rubbed his face against him. Our other dog also used to lick my legs when I got out of the shower. It’s a grooming thing, I think. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/46 "2007-01-12T01:17:22Z")
[QUOTE=saoirse] or rather _rhile_ the dogs were in the bed. [/QUOTE] Was one dog Scooby Doo? This thread has made me realize I probably can’t ever have pets, or I have to have a firm no-pets-in-the-bedroom rule. My bed is for me. It needs to either smell like me or my SO, or like clean linens. I would be completely grossed out by bed that had a pet smell. I couldn’t lie in that bed, much less boink in it. And if the pet interrupted the boinking… oh lord, heaven help that animal… ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/47 "2007-01-12T01:41:28Z")
I’m sorry, but I _have_ to rename this thread something other than,“How do you have sex with your dog?”. I was fine with it until I noticed it was right above the thread titled,“Would you eat this meat?” ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/48 "2007-01-12T02:38:00Z")
[QUOTE=Czarcasm] I’m sorry, but I _have_ to rename this thread something other than,“How do you have sex with your dog?”. I was fine with it until I noticed it was right above the thread titled,“Would you eat this meat?” [/QUOTE] Dude - you’re giving step by step instructions about how to throw a good orgy in that other thread, and you’re objecting to my _TITLE_? Well fine then. Mr. Poopie Pants. 😃 (FWIW I sort of figured the roll over would eliminate any confusion.) ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/49 "2007-01-12T03:33:22Z")
[QUOTE=AudreyK] I would be completely grossed out by bed that had a pet smell. [/QUOTE] If bed has a “pet smell” it’s because the sheets aren’t being changed often enough. Yuck! My boyfriend’s dog sleeps in the bed with him all of the time (under the covers, even), and I have _never_ noticed a “dog” smell in his bed. It always smells like a combination of clean sheets and him, and I’m there at least once a week. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/50 "2007-01-12T03:34:22Z")
[QUOTE=alice\_in\_wonderland] Dude - you’re giving step by step instructions about how to throw a good orgy in that other thread, and you’re objecting to my _TITLE_? Well fine then. Mr. Poopie Pants. 😃 (FWIW I sort of figured the roll over would eliminate any confusion.) [/QUOTE] Just be glad I didn’t _combine_ the two threads. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Queuing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/90ced4/32.png) [@Queuing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queuing)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/51 "2007-01-12T03:44:28Z")
My GF (at the time) had a couple of schnauzers (those little dogs with beards for those not in the know), well technically her parents did and one time we were doing the deed (in her parents bed which was king size) and one of the dogs was on the bed. She seemed mildly worried about was going on. The more intense it became the closer the dog got. I was trying to ignore the dog, but my instincts were telling me to keep an eye on the dog, so I did. As she got closer, and louder, the dog suddenly backed up a couple of steps, and LEAPED at me. Holy crap, did that scare me. I was naked, and a dog was leaping at me, baring its teeth. You have never seen a human move quicker then I did at that moment, managing to grab the dog mere centimetres before it was close enough to taste me. While my unit was never in danger, most of it being safely kept by her, it did interrupt things. Not for long though. The dog was put outside the room. As to the actual OP, I would gauge the reaction of the guy towards the dog; is he a dog person? At least a pet person? If so I wouldn’t worry about having the dog in the room. The first time on the bed might be a little much though. ---
**Author:** ![Sleel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/73ab20/32.png) [@Sleel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleel)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/52 "2007-01-12T11:30:25Z")
My now-wife then-girlfriend’s poodle used to cause me no small amount of grief when I first started seeing her. I still kind of hate the damn thing sometimes, though I no longer want to throw him off the eighth floor balcony on a regular basis. The first time we had sex, he started barking just as I was getting close. That made it very, very hard for me to finish. He did that a lot, and he had abominable timing. Drove me frigging nuts. Worse were the times he’d jump up on the bed and stick his nose in my butt, or even worse, try to lick stuff. Apparently, human juices are appealing to the little rat. She had a kind of studio, so it was difficult to put him someplace and we didn’t always plan for things to happen. He didn’t always cause trouble, so we didn’t always throw him out. We finally ended up putting him in the bathroom when he was being too much of a pain. Well, there was the one time when we tried just putting him in the entrance section (there was a door dividing the small entrance-way from the rest of the apartment) and he pissed on my backpack. I insisted on the bathroom after that. My vote: strangle the . . . er, I mean, throw the dog out of the room, put it where it’s not going to get into anything, do anything to prevent it getting in the way of sex. Your boyfriend will definitely resent it if there are any interruptions during festivities. And believe me, the only thing that kills ardor more quickly than a cold nose in the taint is a dog licking something, whether your feet or something else. Even she was annoyed enough to literally knock the little bugger off the bed when he licked her butt once when she was on top. I have never wanted to rend a living thing limb from limb more than the second time he started barking his head off when I was trying to come. The first time, okay, new thing, I can take that in stride. Second time, when I’d gotten through about an hour of foreplay and other fun and was in the home stretch after much delightful bouncing, that was a challenge. I’ve mostly come to terms with him (I have to after all if I want to live with my wife) and he hasn’t done any of those things for years, but when I remember the crap he put me through in the early days I think fondly of the shortness of doggie lifespans. Only about 10 more years to go. (Dammit!) ---
**Author:** ![Sapo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@Sapo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapo)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/53 "2007-01-12T15:21:41Z")
[QUOTE=Czarcasm] I’m sorry, but I _have_ to rename this thread something other than,“How do you have sex with your dog?”. I was fine with it until I noticed it was right above the thread titled,“Would you eat this meat?” [/QUOTE] And with this post you just created a new MB game: “Awkward thread titles yuxtaposition mania”, just in case the “funny username-subject combo spotting” wasn’t cutting it for some. I am seeing the forum with different eyes now. ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/54 "2007-01-12T15:27:26Z")
[QUOTE=Sapo] And with this post you just created a new MB game: "Awkward thread titles yuxtaposition mania [/QUOTE] Hardly new: there’s usually at least one active thread with “sequential threads” in the title (I think they usually appear in MPSIMS) at all times. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/55 "2007-01-12T16:31:51Z")
The question is not clear. How do you have sex with your dog in which room? ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/56 "2007-01-12T16:52:38Z")
[QUOTE=Queuing] a couple of schnauzers (those little dogs with beards for those not in the know) [/QUOTE] Tom Cruise is a Schnauzer? ---
**Author:** ![gonzomax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e8c25b/32.png) [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/57 "2007-01-12T17:00:58Z")
I have never had sex with my dog in the room or porch or anyplace else. ---
**Author:** ![Lissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/85f322/32.png) [@Lissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissa)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/58 "2007-01-12T17:15:14Z")
[QUOTE=nashiitashii] Actually, she understands sex as Mommy and Daddy are trying to make a new baby . . . [/QUOTE] I’ve imagined a Far Side version of this conversation between my dogs, staring at the closed bedroom door: “Well, they’re at it again.” “Man, they’ve gotta be doing something wrong! Eight years of this and\* still \*no puppies!” ---
**Author:** ![Sapo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@Sapo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapo)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/59 "2007-01-12T17:44:13Z")
[QUOTE=Misnomer] Hardly new: there’s usually at least one active thread with “sequential threads” in the title (I think they usually appear in MPSIMS) at all times. 🙂 [/QUOTE] Is that what those are? How do they work? ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [January 12, 2007, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512/60 "2007-01-12T18:22:34Z")
[QUOTE=Sapo] Is that what those are? How do they work? [/QUOTE] Maybe you should open one and find out. I know, you’ve heard that before, but really nothing bad will happen. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-have-sex-with-your-dog-in-the-room/387512.md?page=4)