Police have statistics and heuristics that they go by. If your kids are abducted, their first suspicion will be that it’s an inside job : like the other spouse or grandparents etc etc. I am not a lawyer, but it is probably in your, and your kids best interest, to take a lawyer on your side early on. It will help keep the cops from just pursuing you and your wife as suspects, and make them look for other potential kidnappers.
They should report the rape and in my opinion also retain a lawyer from the get go. Doing this keeps the cop straight and makes sure that regardless of skin color, the rape kit gets processed correctly, the rape victim gets the correct questions asked, and the cops don’t victim shame… Many times the victim may have used drugs either voluntarily or under duress, the victim maybe an illegal immigrant, etc etc - the lawyer will protect the victim from the police