# How do you light a chimney starter if you don't get the newspaper?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Created:** [December 5, 2010, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009 "2010-12-05T05:40:56Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/1 "2010-12-05T05:40:56Z")

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I’m working my way through _Low & Slow_ and am making baby back ribs in the smoker tomorrow. Only, I forgot to grab newspaper from work Friday, and I don’t get the paper.

I can run by a gas station tomorrow morning and grab a paper (plus coupons) but I’d rather not have to if I can get a good fire engaging my charcoal some other way. Paper towels? Suggestions?

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**Author:** ![Lubricious\_Integument](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/82dd89/32.png) [@Lubricious\_Integument](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lubricious_Integument)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/2 "2010-12-05T05:50:53Z")

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Any paper or cardboard should work. I suggest filling the chimney 1/4 of the way up. It is easier to get the fire going, and once they are lit top off the chimney and give it 15 minutes.

Now that that’s out of the way…

MMMMMMMM RIBS!!! What wood are you using?

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**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/3 "2010-12-05T05:51:31Z")

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Pull the newsprint advertising junk mail out of your recycle bin and use those.

Use a few sheets of printer paper.

Whatever you do, give the paper a light coat of cooking oil. This will let them burn longer.

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**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/4 "2010-12-05T06:06:33Z")

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Oh, is _that_ why they send me those? I might have one in the bin - I’ll have to check. Unless stale beer residue is a problem.

I’m using hickory because I’m just learning, so I want to keep variables to a minimum. I don’t even like ribs.

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**Author:** ![Lubricious\_Integument](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/82dd89/32.png) [@Lubricious\_Integument](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lubricious_Integument)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/5 "2010-12-05T06:10:46Z")

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> [@Zsofia](#):
>
> I don’t even like ribs.

Does not compute.

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**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/6 "2010-12-05T06:39:08Z")

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I actually just wad up a piece of the charcoal bag and use that to light the chimney starter.

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**Author:** ![DirkGntly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DirkGntly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DirkGntly)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/7 "2010-12-05T07:43:35Z")

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I use cotton balls, petroleum jelly and canning wax (parafin).

I rub a bunch cotton balls in the petroleum jelly, and I break up the parafin into roughly 1-inch chunks. I then keep these in small zip-top sandwich or snack bags, with the parafin separate from the soaked cotton balls. To start my chimney, I place a few (3 - 5) of the cotton balls in a small pile, and then set one of the chunks of parafin on top. Fill up the chimney with charcoal, center it over the cotton balls/parafin. Light with a match and in 10-15 minutes you have a nice set of hot coals ready to go in your grill.

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**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 8:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/8 "2010-12-05T08:44:55Z")

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A little vegetable oil on the coals?

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**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 9:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/9 "2010-12-05T09:12:50Z")

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Dryer lint is great for starting fires.

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**Author:** ![devilsknew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4da419/32.png) [@devilsknew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/devilsknew)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 9:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/10 "2010-12-05T09:22:34Z")

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Two or three rolls of toilet paper?

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**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/11 "2010-12-05T15:12:46Z")

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Normally I’d say if you don’t like ribs don’t make them.  
However in this case following Gary’s program really will make you a better cook so enlist a neighbor to make the ultimate scrifice and eat your homework 😃

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**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/12 "2010-12-05T15:18:40Z")

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> [@Zsofia](#):
>
> Oh, is _that_ why they send me those? I might have one in the bin - I’ll have to check. Unless stale beer residue is a problem.

It must be. That’s the only thing I use them for.

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**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\
**Post date:** [December 5, 2010, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/13 "2010-12-05T16:06:58Z")

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> [@zoid](#):
>
> Normally I’d say if you don’t like ribs don’t make them.  
> However in this case following Gary’s program really will make you a better cook so enlist a neighbor to make the ultimate scrifice and eat your homework 😃

Oh, my dad’s thrilled.

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**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\
**Post date:** [December 6, 2010, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/14 "2010-12-06T00:19:34Z")

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… and Dad was a huge fan. Are there seriously people, as per the book, who don’t like their ribs fall-off-the-bone? Gross.

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**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\
**Post date:** [December 6, 2010, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/15 "2010-12-06T00:26:21Z")

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> [@pulykamell](#):
>
> I actually just wad up a piece of the charcoal bag and use that to light the chimney starter.

This. I’m always a little disturbed at how well charcoal bags burn.

> [@](#):
>
> … and Dad was a huge fan. Are there seriously people, as per the book, who don’t like their ribs fall-off-the-bone? Gross.

I like mine to still have a little bite.

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**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\
**Post date:** [December 6, 2010, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/16 "2010-12-06T03:05:23Z")

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> [@Zsofia](#):
>
> … and Dad was a huge fan. Are there seriously people, as per the book, who don’t like their ribs fall-off-the-bone? Gross.

Yes. Proper ribs–OK, the way _I_ like ribs–should be somewhat soft, yet toothsome. They should pull from the bone with a bit of a tug, but not fall off like a pot roast. They should require teeth to eat. Floppy rib meat is gross. I didn’t think I liked ribs for the longest time because all I got was the gloppy, gelatinous, so-soft-you-can-almost-suck-it-through-a-straw variety. Then, one day, I discovered not all ribs are this way, and I fell in love with barbecue. If someone describes a place that serves “fall off the bone” ribs, I know that’s not the place for me. I frankly don’t understand why people don’t want their meat to have the texture of meat, but different strokes and all. That’s what’s so nice about making your own barbecue. You can make it any damned way you like it.

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**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\
**Post date:** [December 6, 2010, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/17 "2010-12-06T03:32:53Z")

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Well, I got a whole rack cooked your way because I got a little spooked and wanted to make sure I had at least one edible rack in case cooking longer made the other two tough. 🙂 (Nobody ate it.)

ETA - it revolts me when you call ribs “barbecue”.

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**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\
**Post date:** [December 6, 2010, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/18 "2010-12-06T04:23:51Z")

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> [@Zsofia](#):
>
> Well, I got a whole rack cooked your way because I got a little spooked and wanted to make sure I had at least one edible rack in case cooking longer made the other two tough. 🙂 (Nobody ate it.)
> 
> ETA - it revolts me when you call ribs “barbecue”.

Oh yeah, you’re from the Carolinas, where “barbecue” refers only to pulled or chopped pork. That’s an adorable little quirk. Is it better if I say “That’s what’s so nice about making your own barbecued meats?” Seems unnecessarily wordy.

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**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\
**Post date:** [December 6, 2010, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/19 "2010-12-06T04:41:52Z")

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Missed edit:

It’s actually a very good thing to hold a rack or two of ribs behind and try them at various stages of doneness while you’re learning barbe_cough_, I mean hot smoking, so you get a chance to learn how the meat progresses, and how to “read” it. The meat starts out floppy when raw, then tightens up. As the collagen breaks down, it gets softer and softer. At some point, all the collagen is rendered and you start getting into overdoneness and drying out territory. I like to judge using a pair of tongs and lifting a rack in the middle with them. They should be sag and just about start to crack but not be quite so soft that they fall apart under their own weight. Soft, but toothsome, more like a filet mignon than braised short ribs. But they should come off the bone cleanly. (Although I don’t mind if it’s a little underdone).

If you want consistent and easy-as-pie fall-off-the-bone ribs on the WSM, you can also cook them for two hours normally, foil them for two hours, and then finish them out of the foil for an hour. (Times are, of course, dependent on your cooking temperature, your meat, etc.) Barbecue purists–I mean, people who like various types of foods cooked using a method that involves low and usually indirect heat and wood–may tut-tut the practice, but who cares? (I’ll foil brisket from time to time.)

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**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\
**Post date:** [December 6, 2010, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-light-a-chimney-starter-if-you-dont-get-the-newspaper/563009/20 "2010-12-06T05:02:00Z")

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Go to a newspaper’s web site, print out a few pages of stories, and use that to light your charcoal.

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