# How do you make a flirt thread? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 10, 2001, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486 "2001-10-10T02:34:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![VitrolicBump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a587f6/32.png) [@VitrolicBump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VitrolicBump)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/81 "2001-10-12T16:11:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mrblue92 \* > \*\*Aww… > > (Now stop it before you make everyone else puke, K?) 😛 \*\* Okay. I’ll stop. :mwah: (And what I said is true.:)) ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/82 "2001-10-12T17:23:34Z")
Hey, look, **dlgirl** and **mrblue** …Let’s not hijack a perfectly good flirt thread into a bunch of kissyface. Unless some of it’s directed at me, of course. ---
**Author:** ![VitrolicBump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a587f6/32.png) [@VitrolicBump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VitrolicBump)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/83 "2001-10-12T17:29:24Z")
Oh, sure. You would like that wouldn’t you? Well, I am not going to be naughty (for anyone else but **mrblue** :)). You are just going to have to find someone else to fill that place. I am sure someone else would be more than happy to… ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2001, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/84 "2001-10-12T22:27:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by xizor \* > \*\*Actually I was thinking of a picture, but if there is the option of a private showing, then I’ll take on of those please! \*\* I don’t happen to have any pics of my legs handy, though there may be some buried amidst the records of the festivities at ChiDope, as I was wearing my typical brief skirt at that rather notable event, thus affording an excellent view of the aforementioned fabulous gams; however, I am disinclined to search for them at the moment, so unless you find yourself with sufficient spare time to find them your own damnself, it appears a private showing it will have to be. Parse that and I just might sleep with ya. ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/85 "2001-10-15T20:59:33Z")
Well? ---
**Author:** ![Tretiak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a88e57/32.png) [@Tretiak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tretiak)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/86 "2001-10-15T21:06:24Z")
Sam Clam and Larry Lobster were best friends at the bottom of the ocean. One day they wandered into shallow rocky waters when a hurricane came through and smashed them both against the rocks. Larry instantly found himself at the Gates of Heaven where he was greeted by Peter himself… The rest of the story is really good and funny, honest. But I won’t tell it here. Because here is where I am supposed to say the things to make you smile and nod and want to fire off an email to me. Here is where I mention by great job and my impeccable hygiene. And you make a mental note and think “Yeah”. And I say how I like my beer dark and my hockey live and absolutely no ketchup on my hot dogs. And then you quietly mouth “Yes”. And I continue on about how I like all the things you like, almost certainly, like ice cream and jazz music on a warm summer evening. And then you try to resist the urge to scream out “Yes! Yes!” at the top of your lungs, because you don’t want to upset your co-workers or neighbors. And I mention how I am funny and sincere and whatever else seems to be in vogue these days. But who is kidding whom. What you really need to know is the rest of the story about Larry Lobster. And I tell it better than anyone. No weirdos or freaks. ---
**Author:** ![VitrolicBump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a587f6/32.png) [@VitrolicBump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VitrolicBump)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/87 "2001-10-15T21:15:57Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Tretiak_ > **No weirdos or freaks.** And you came _here_? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![tevya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@tevya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tevya)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/88 "2001-10-15T21:27:54Z")
I usually don’t participate in online flirting and I will probably not respect myself in the morning (or after I hit submit), but could someone throw me a bone and give a me a good juicy flirt post? If necessary we can arrange something through paypal. I’m sliding towards depressed and am feeling lonely, ugly, stupid, fat, and generally unattractive. (How’s **that** for sucky material to work with?) [sub]God I hope this doesn’t look as pathetic as I know it does![/sub] ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/89 "2001-10-15T21:58:13Z")
JomoMojo, hon’, where’s the original poem you were going to compose for me? ☹ Watermelon Man, you still haven’t taken my order for a drink yet. [sigh] Nobody wants to flirt with me. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2001, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/90 "2001-10-15T22:05:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Geobabe \* > \*\*Parse that and I just might sleep with ya. \*\* Ok, so that would be: IF I want to see your legs I have 2 choices. 1). Look for pictures from a dopefest where you wore a mini-skirt. 2). Be disinclined to do that and “settle” for a private showing. I choose option number 2. And since I did the parsing, sleeping with Geobabe remains in the maybe category instead of in the not-on-your-life category. Yay me! ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/91 "2001-10-16T00:26:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dlgirl \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > _Originally posted by Tretiak_ > > **No weirdos or freaks.** > > And you came _here_? 😃 \*\* Yeah really. Didja _read_ the thread before ya posted that, chum? We’ve got a veritable den of virtual iniquity going here. You want something wholesome, look…uh, in threads I haven’t posted to, I guess. OK, now, where was I? Oh yes: > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by xizor \* > \*\* And since I did the parsing, sleeping with Geobabe remains in the maybe category instead of in the not-on-your-life category. Yay me! \*\* Well, you never know until you try, do ya? ---
**Author:** ![bobkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c67d28/32.png) [@bobkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobkitty)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/92 "2001-10-16T00:47:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Geobabe \* > \*\*Well, you never know until you try, do ya? \*\* ::blink:: ::blink:: ::tilting head to one side… yup, still says the same thing:: Hey **Geo** …[sub]poke[/sub] if I keep [sub]poke[/sub] poking at you, [sub]poke[/sub] will you put up with it for a while [sub]poke[/sub] and _then_ bite me, or [sub]poke[/sub] would you just bite me [sub]poke[/sub] right off the bat? The bunny rabbit [sub]poke[/sub] seemed to like it…[sub]poke[/sub] 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/93 "2001-10-16T01:15:10Z")
Chomp! ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/94 "2001-10-16T14:05:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Geobabe \* > \*\*Chomp! \*\* [quickly crosses legs] I see I’ll have to be careful in doing this… Let’s see if what I have in my repetoire of things to say to get women to sleep with me… umm… [kid in back seat voice]will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me? will you sleep with me?[/kid in back street voice] That’s about the best I have. No wonder I never get any. ---
**Author:** ![Geobabe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/geobabe/32/3908_2.png) [@Geobabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geobabe)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/95 "2001-10-16T14:32:22Z")
Well, you just gotta poke me in the right place. I promise I won’t bite then. ---
**Author:** ![Tretiak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a88e57/32.png) [@Tretiak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tretiak)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/96 "2001-10-16T15:17:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dlgirl \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > _Originally posted by Tretiak_ > > **No weirdos or freaks.** > > And you came _here_? 😃 \*\* I was trying to be ironical. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![mrblue92](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@mrblue92](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrblue92)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/97 "2001-10-16T15:26:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tretiak \* > \*\*I was trying to be ironical. 😛 \*\* Have you tried eating spinach? ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/98 "2001-10-16T16:38:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Geobabe \* > \*\*Well, you just gotta poke me in the right place. I promise I won’t bite then. \*\* I can think of 7 I’d like to try right off the bat. ---
**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/99 "2001-10-16T19:14:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by celestina \* > **JomoMojo, hon’, where’s the original poem you were going to compose for me? ☹** Hon! She called me “Hon”! \ Sorry, sweetie, for days I racked my brains for a word that rhymed with “sugar” but all I could think of was b… No, I’m not going to say something I would regret later… Hon is a great place to start **celestina** , my hon Flirtin’ with you is fun Got my blues on the run I’ll be the moon to your sun Let me Yang your Yin It won’t be a sin \*_celestina_, my sky You could make me cry ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2001, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486/100 "2001-10-16T21:26:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jomo Mojo \* > \*\*_celestina_, my sky > You could make me cry \*\* as long as she doesn’t make the baby jesus cry. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-make-a-flirt-thread/86486.md?page=6)