# How DO YOU Picture God? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 4, 2003, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047 "2003-03-04T18:37:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![plain\_jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@plain\_jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plain_jane)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/21 "2003-03-05T02:45:18Z")
I’ve never really pictured god, but I dreamt about him once and he was average looking, white, with brown hair. And about middle-aged. In my dream, he was a pretty laid-back guy, but sharp. We were seated at a cheap table in a fast food restaurant, shooting the breeze. lol Who knows why I visualized him that way? It was a pretty neat dream, actually. I was in a situation that was bothering me and I wanted to know the outcome (in real life). I asked God if he would tell me. He asked me if I really wanted to know… and I realized that I didn’t. Because if he told me something I didn’t want to hear, it would have taken all the energy and motivation out of me. So I declined. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Convict](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Convict](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Convict)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/22 "2003-03-05T03:05:16Z")
Since God created us in His own image, I see Him as a 30 year old guy with short, thinning hair, a small beer belly (but working to lose it), with a cigarette in one hand and a Diet Mountain Dew in the other. ---
**Author:** ![DreadCthulhu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/db5fbb/32.png) [@DreadCthulhu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DreadCthulhu)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/23 "2003-03-05T03:37:30Z")
Well, I just look in a mirror… Anyways, nice pics \*\* bong \*\*, but now I can’t make my Lovecraftian jokes. ---
**Author:** ![Skerri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Skerri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skerri)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/24 "2003-03-05T04:23:08Z")
As [Alanis Morrisette](http://www.dogma-movie.com/pics/alanis/alanisnf.html), of course. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/25 "2003-03-05T04:28:30Z")
If I believed in his existence I would picture father christmas in his nightie. ---
**Author:** ![ford\_prefect42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@ford\_prefect42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ford_prefect42)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/26 "2003-03-05T04:29:10Z")
If God is omniscient and all-powerful, then he/she can look like who or whatever the hell he/she wants to look like… but I like Skerri’s view. I need to watch Dogma again. > [@](#): > > "Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mindbogglingly useful [the existence of the Babel Fish] could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the NONexistence of God. > "The argument goes something like this: ‘I refuse to prove I exist,’ says God, ‘for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.’ > "‘But,’ says Man, ‘the Babel Fish is a dead giveaway, isn’t it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don’t. QED.’ > "‘Oh dear,’ says God, ‘I hadn’t thought of that,’ and promptly vanishes in a puff of logic. > “‘Oh that was easy,’ says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove black is white and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.” > > Douglas Adams, _The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy_ ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/27 "2003-03-05T04:30:30Z")
Nice of Doug to remember me like that 😃 ---
**Author:** ![ford\_prefect42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@ford\_prefect42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ford_prefect42)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/28 "2003-03-05T04:32:40Z")
hehe… was just thinking that too, **Q.E.D.** 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Copper\_moon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecc23a/32.png) [@Copper\_moon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Copper_moon)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/29 "2003-03-05T06:18:30Z")
Boy, are there any Christians around here at all? Well being in the minority I feel like I’m going to come off as sounding childish but I picture God as this big grandpa kinda guy. A lot more understanding than people first assume and with a great sense of humor. He has kind eyes that crinkle up when he laughs. And even though he’s big and mighty his voice sometimes is just above a whisper speaking wisdom and love. Well that’s my two cents worth. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/30 "2003-03-05T06:20:46Z")
[hijack] How do Muslims picture God? (or alah?)[/hijack] ---
**Author:** ![ProjectOmega](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b487fb/32.png) [@ProjectOmega](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ProjectOmega)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/31 "2003-03-05T06:31:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lobsang \* > \*\*[hijack] How do Muslims picture God? (or alah?)[/hijack] \*\* Correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe it’s against Muslim law to create any images of Allah, so they probably look at him as more as an ethereal, all-encompassing kind of dude. ---
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/32 "2003-03-05T07:16:47Z")
A large, faceless glowing figure sitting on a chair, passing judgement on all that come before Him. Oh, sorry, that’s how Jack Chick pictures him. 😃 I don’t really have a solid picture of what The Grand Old One of the Universe (I love that name for Him) looks like. However, I bet he smells like warm cookies. ---
**Author:** ![Already\_in\_Use](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Already\_in\_Use](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Already_in_Use)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 8:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/33 "2003-03-05T08:26:45Z")
Me. _or_ Imagine an erect penis (symbolizing logic) that twists four-dimensionally to become a vagina (symbolizing absurdity, or maybe the symbolism should go the other way around); this entity is eternally screwing itself like a dirtier version of Ouroboros. Except you can’t really picture it because you’d have to be outside of it to picture it, and you can’t get outside of it, because it’s all of reality, self-contained and self-creating. _or_ A disembodied sense of humor. More comprehensible is Sterculius, Roman god of BS, who currently has vast influence over earthly life. He can be represented as a toga-wearing individual with innumerable tentacles instead of legs, a television set for a head, and a wheelbarrow of manure. ---
**Author:** ![Tblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/278dde/32.png) [@Tblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tblue)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/34 "2003-03-05T12:14:05Z")
Big Grey Cloud. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![universe.zip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/a9adbd/32.png) [@universe.zip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/universe.zip)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/35 "2003-03-05T12:53:46Z")
In second grade, we had to draw a picture of Jacob´s dream. My God was a bald old man with a brown gown and brown felt slippers. Everyone laughed at me because of the slippers… 🙂 I´m agnostic, so I don´t really give it much thought, but I like **Magickly Delicious** ´ picture. I wouldn´t mind if he was God. Or my grandfather, for that matter. ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/36 "2003-03-05T12:56:48Z")
I don’t know, but if he’s any kind of god then when I get to heaven he’ll have a bong, some good coffee, and Rice Krispie Treats waiting for me. ---
**Author:** ![Pabitel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bbce88/32.png) [@Pabitel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pabitel)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/37 "2003-03-05T14:12:22Z")
He has horns and an perminant erection, tends to handle snakes and hangs around in the woods mostly. ---
**Author:** ![Skerri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Skerri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skerri)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/38 "2003-03-05T14:26:43Z")
> [@](#): > > Boy, are there any Christians around here at all? Yup, but if you watch the movie **Dogma** , there is a very interesting point of what God looks like. (At the beginning of the movie, God is an elderly man, and at the end it’s Alanis Morrisette.) So please don’t assume that some people aren’t Christian based on the fact that their mental picture of God is different from yours. ---
**Author:** ![gallows\_fodder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8c91f0/32.png) [@gallows\_fodder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gallows_fodder)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/39 "2003-03-05T14:33:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by plain\_jane \* > \*\*I’ve never really pictured god, but I dreamt about him once and he was average looking, white, with brown hair. And about middle-aged. In my dream, he was a pretty laid-back guy, but sharp. We were seated at a cheap table in a fast food restaurant, shooting the breeze. lol Who knows why I visualized him that way? \*\* This is too funny. A few years ago, I dreamt about talking to a young man (~30) who was white with short, curly brown hair and radiated this profound stillness or tranquility. He sat on a rocking chair in the grass, and I stood leaning against my car parked nearby, and we had a very pleasant conversation about what I was doing with my life at the time, and what I wanted to be doing. I was struck by how interested he seemed in what I was saying…I seemed to have his full attention. When I woke up, I felt that the guy had to be Jesus or an angel or something, because of that unearthly peacefulness he had about him. I don’t imagine God as having corporeal form…I just picture a lot of light. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [March 5, 2003, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-picture-god/159047/40 "2003-03-05T14:36:49Z")
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