# How do you smuggle a live tiger onto a plane? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 27, 2010, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730 "2010-08-27T22:49:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/21 "2010-08-30T22:11:51Z")
> [@Gorsnak](#): > > Dress it up in a red Nike golf shirt. Didn’t want this to pass without the obligatory golf clap. ---
**Author:** ![Linty\_Fresh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Linty\_Fresh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linty_Fresh)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/22 "2010-08-30T22:24:55Z")
I would buy the tiger a ticket and call it my hairy nephew. And to feed it, I’d bring a couple of chunks of dead gazelle, too. You know, because you’re allowed two pieces of carrion. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/23 "2010-08-30T22:48:26Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > > [@Quartz](#): > > > > Two months old? Is that old enough to leave its mother? > > Yes, barely. It’s old enough to survive on regular tiger food… By “tiger food” I presume you mean “airline passengers”. ---
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2010, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/24 "2010-08-31T01:01:14Z")
> [@Linty\_Fresh](#): > > I would buy the tiger a ticket and call it my hairy nephew. And to feed it, I’d bring a couple of chunks of dead gazelle, too. > > You know, because you’re allowed two pieces of carrion. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Beerman1963](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/2acd7d/32.png) [@Beerman1963](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beerman1963)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2010, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/25 "2010-08-31T01:06:46Z")
“two pieces of carrion” slow clap for linty fresh. not so much for the beer soaked keyboard ---
**Author:** ![Gorsnak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gorsnak/32/7587_2.png) [@Gorsnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorsnak)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2010, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/26 "2010-08-31T01:10:20Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > > [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > > > Yes, barely. It’s old enough to survive on regular tiger food… > > By “tiger food” I presume you mean “airline passengers”. Admit it, that guy in 15E was annoying the hell out of you too. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2010, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/27 "2010-08-31T02:49:57Z")
> [@Gorsnak](#): > > > [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > > > By “tiger food” I presume you mean “airline passengers”. > > Admit it, that guy in 15E was annoying the hell out of you too. Well yeah, but what’s left of him isn’t giving me a lot of comfort either. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2010, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/28 "2010-08-31T04:25:18Z")
> [@Autolycus](#): > > 1. Stuff tiger cub into underpants. > 2. ??? > 3. Profit! You could use [this](https://stashitware.com/), the latest Weird Earl’s offering. > [@PlainJain](#): > > > [@Gorsnak](#): > > > > Dress it up in a red Nike golf shirt. > > Didn’t want this to pass without the obligatory golf clap. Golf clap? Isn’t that what Tiger Woods comes down with after a big weekend? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2010, 7:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/29 "2010-08-31T07:58:32Z")
I’ve smuggled a full grown tiger into a 747 and it was easy getting past security once hypnotized the tiger and then explained to security why I was carrying-on a large thicket of reeds and marsh. Shit, I think I had a croc in there too! Well, something bit me and it wasn’t the tiger. Don’t you feel something pulling your leg? ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2010, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730/30 "2010-08-31T13:39:45Z")
Okay, I’ll be the one to say it: That little thing is so dang cute! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-do-you-smuggle-a-live-tiger-onto-a-plane/551730.md?page=1)