Alas, it sounds like you would be surprised to learn how many people make the same mistakes over and over again.
I know many people who claim to have never had an auto accident. I know many more who’ve had lots of accidents. I don’t know anyone who’s just had one accident and then learned from their mistake.
Yes, it has ocurred to me that I’m enabling her by always trying to solve her problems. My son also suffers the consequences of her bad decisions. There are two factors that always push me into this: my only grandaughter lives with her and doesn’t deserve to suffer financially for her mother’s mistakes; and, she was born in Colombia and because of her upbringing in that culture she is overly emotional (so kill me, but it’s my observation about women from latin cultures) and doesn’t think rationally; and she thinks women are supposed to stay home and cook and raise babies and the men are supposed to take care of everything else, so she is always resentful that things didn’t work out that way. She can make the car payment but it’s tough. When she bought the car she says she planned to refinance it, but when she went to the bank they refused because she had too many “lates” on her credit report, but told her to come back in a year. I agree that the best thing is for her to keep it and bite the bullet; maybe she can get the bank to refi it in a few months. The price to pay for the alternatives is too high. Thank you all for your observations and advice.
Then you need to read his post much more carefully. They forgave four grand of money they were owed, apparently for free. How does that make them “tossers”? Because they filed a 1099? The forgiveness of a loan without recompense is income under the Tax Code – had the bank failed to report this, it’d be guilty of a felony.
–Cliffy