# How Does Dr. Maturin deal With VD? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 28, 2008, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-dr-maturin-deal-with-vd/474801 "2008-11-28T15:27:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-dr-maturin-deal-with-vd/474801/1 "2008-11-28T15:27:18Z")
Captain Jack Aubrey’s fine new frigate has just called in at Alexandria. the sailors have been at sea for 6 weeks, and now want liberty. of course, being horny young men, they head for the local brothels-and upon their return, Dr. Maturin holds sick bay. Captain Jack Aubrey is furious-he cannot afford to have his men out of action-so, Dr. Maturin-what do you do? Most of the lads are already complaining about painful urination-what is the conversation at the wardroom table likely to be like? Of course, Aubrey himself is after a comely egyptian girl-what happens if HE comes down with a dose? Will that get back to wife Sophie? and how would it affect jack’s chances for promotion? ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-dr-maturin-deal-with-vd/474801/2 "2008-11-28T16:31:26Z")
Lads just have a bit of copper wire inserted into their urethra and then a flame is applied to the end, heating the wire through and burning out the infection. No big deal. These are _sailors_, not nancy little girls. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Icerigger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icerigger/32/432_2.png) [@Icerigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icerigger)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-dr-maturin-deal-with-vd/474801/3 "2008-11-28T18:45:03Z")
They also injected your urethra with Mercury hence the expression “one night with Venus gets you Six months with Mercury”. I don’t know if it killed you or cured you. ---
**Author:** ![Quercus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/7ab992/32.png) [@Quercus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quercus)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-dr-maturin-deal-with-vd/474801/4 "2008-11-28T20:02:26Z")
You realize that, every thirtieth page or so when Dr. Maturin is contemplating his sick list and after the list of those wounded in action or more exotically damaged adds ‘and the usual poxes’, he’s talking about just that situation? ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-dr-maturin-deal-with-vd/474801/5 "2008-11-28T20:24:26Z")
From “A Sea of Words” Because syphilis was almost an occupational hazard of sailors, Navy Surgeons stocked various mercury salts to treat it. Most victims required prolonged therapy with oral mercury preparations, such as calomel or Maturin’s “blue pill” (mercuric chloride, also known as corrosive sublimate) and with unguents made with the latter. All mercuricals were cathartic and diaphoretic, providing clear routes for the elimination of the contagious factor responsible for the affliction. However, it seems unlikely that such treatments could have eradicated the syphilis organism. ---
**Author:** ![Bobotheoptimist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/919ad9/32.png) [@Bobotheoptimist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bobotheoptimist)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2008, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-dr-maturin-deal-with-vd/474801/6 "2008-11-28T20:32:04Z")
Blue pill, blue ointment are, I think, mercury compounds. From [here](http://drvitelli.typepad.com/providentia/2008/05/the-mercury-mav.html) > [@](#): > > Mercury was the treatment of choice for syphilis (despite the fact that it did nothing to prevent the onset of dementia or death) but was most widely used in the form of mercurous chloride (better known as calomel). For centuries, the calomel “blue pills” were dispensed by physicians to children and adults as an all-purpose diuretic and laxative. And Jack did catch VD at one point, when Molly was screwing the army guy IIRC.