# How does one become certified to be an 'ancient astronaut theorist'?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [June 4, 2012, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045 "2012-06-04T16:00:15Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![BlinkingDuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@BlinkingDuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlinkingDuck)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/1 "2012-06-04T16:00:15Z")

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Do I need anything besides wild hair?

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**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/22080_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/2 "2012-06-04T16:04:52Z")

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Certified or certifiable??

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**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/3 "2012-06-04T16:16:20Z")

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I think you would need to start with a ancient astronaut theory, the hair comes in later 🙂

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**Author:** ![BlinkingDuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@BlinkingDuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlinkingDuck)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/4 "2012-06-04T16:21:10Z")

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> [@kanicbird](#):
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> I think you would need to start with a ancient astronaut theory, the hair comes in later 🙂

Can a bald person become an ancient astronaut theorist or are they SOL?

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**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/5 "2012-06-04T16:22:31Z")

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Is such a thing \*even \ ***possible**?

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**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/6 "2012-06-04T16:22:39Z")

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> [@BlinkingDuck](#):
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> Can a bald person become an ancient astronaut theorist or are they SOL?

You can still grow out your eyebrows.

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**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/7 "2012-06-04T16:42:23Z")

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I would be glad to certify you for a small fee.

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**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/8 "2012-06-04T17:18:24Z")

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This is actually something I’ve wondered about myself. What sort of credentials do the “experts” on Ancient Aliens or any of the other UFO, paranormal type shows you see on the History Channel these days, have.

Do any of them work for legitimate academic institutions, or been published in serious historical publications. Or are they just folks who’ve self-published a few books, and gone too far off the deep end.

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**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/9 "2012-06-04T18:06:45Z")

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> [@BlinkingDuck](#):
>
> Do I need anything besides wild hair?

Either the total absence of anything resembling skepticism, or sufficient cynicism to enjoy taking advantage of those who lack skepticism. Either one will do.

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**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/10 "2012-06-04T18:09:38Z")

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USC offers a degree program in ancient aliens.  
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That’s a joke from a Bruin. So please, no Trojan lawsuits. By the way, did anyone here know the Trojan Horse of Troy fame was an alien spaceship?

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**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/11 "2012-06-04T18:25:59Z")

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First, you have to study astronauts. Then, live a long, long time…

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**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/12 "2012-06-04T18:30:04Z")

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Reminds me of an old “National Lampoon” issue…if ancient astronauts visited the earth, they must have eaten meals here…if they ate meals, they must have left…garbage!😃

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**Author:** ![BlinkingDuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@BlinkingDuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlinkingDuck)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/13 "2012-06-04T18:51:06Z")

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> [@RTFirefly](#):
>
> Either the total absence of anything resembling skepticism, or sufficient cynicism to enjoy taking advantage of those who lack skepticism. Either one will do.

There has to be a wild hair component…has to be.

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**Author:** ![BlinkingDuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@BlinkingDuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlinkingDuck)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/14 "2012-06-04T18:53:06Z")

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> [@The\_Second\_Stone](#):
>
> .  
> .  
> That’s a joke from a Bruin. So please, no Trojan lawsuits. By the way, did anyone here know the Trojan Horse of Troy fame was an alien spaceship?

You need more education as an ancient astronaut theorist!

You should have said:

Is it possible (or could it be) that the Trojan Horse of Troy fame was an alien spaceship?  
{My wife laughs at me because I will say “No. next question.”…and they will then ask one. 🙂 }

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**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\
**Post date:** [June 4, 2012, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/15 "2012-06-04T23:47:06Z")

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How?

I don’t know.

Therefore, ALIENS!

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**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\
**Post date:** [June 5, 2012, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/16 "2012-06-05T01:00:41Z")

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[http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/7a/Ancient\_aliens.png](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/7a/Ancient_aliens.png)

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**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\
**Post date:** [June 5, 2012, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/17 "2012-06-05T02:06:37Z")

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> [@Frodo](#):
>
> [http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/7a/Ancient\_aliens.png](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/7a/Ancient_aliens.png)

His hairdo certainly proves that human culture has been manipulated by the Centauri, if nothing else.

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**Author:** ![Frodo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/frodo/32/302_2.png) [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)\
**Post date:** [June 5, 2012, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/18 "2012-06-05T02:10:29Z")

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[![](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-oNokyRhGs-A/Tv4GR7DmWCI/AAAAAAAAA6Q/9Pf_g45E2tM/s1600/is_such_a_thing_even_possible.jpg) ](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-oNokyRhGs-A/Tv4GR7DmWCI/AAAAAAAAA6Q/9Pf_g45E2tM/s1600/is_such_a_thing_even_possible.jpg)

[![](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-gGxLlnvQbaw/Tv4JvavQdKI/AAAAAAAAA6c/WshTxyn1dJk/s1600/yes_it_is.jpg) ](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-gGxLlnvQbaw/Tv4JvavQdKI/AAAAAAAAA6c/WshTxyn1dJk/s1600/yes_it_is.jpg)

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**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\
**Post date:** [June 5, 2012, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/19 "2012-06-05T14:40:46Z")

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Thank God ancient astronaut theorizing has been one of the few domains to resist the American fetish for over-education and over-credentialization. You _don’t need_ twelve degrees and a certificate from some fancy-pants licensing board, by God. All you need is a theory, a hairdo, a smile, and a shoeshine, and the smile and shoeshine are optional.

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**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\
**Post date:** [June 5, 2012, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045/20 "2012-06-05T14:42:44Z")

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> [@BlinkingDuck](#):
>
> Do I need anything besides wild hair?

Well, you need a theory, but just about any hair-brained one will do.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-become-certified-to-be-an-ancient-astronaut-theorist/624045.md?page=2)