# How does one get the Hells Angels off your back? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 30, 2022, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742 "2022-04-30T23:50:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2022, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/1 "2022-04-30T23:50:14Z")
My friend, “J.”, has a cousin she lives with in Ontario, whom I’ll call “Z”. Z has gotten on the wrong side of the Hells Angels. They’re suspicious of him because he makes a lot of money, and think he’s been dealing in drugs and stripping-- in other words, they think he’s competition, and they want to take him out. Z. is terrified to come home, because they know where he lives. And he’s afraid to go to the police, because he thinks they’ve got a couple officers on their payroll. What’s he to do? (This is not a hypothetical situation. This is actually happening, right now. I’m talking with J, and she’s terrified.) ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/2 "2022-05-01T00:00:24Z")
Call the OPP. [Outlaw Motorcycle Gangs](https://www.opp.ca/index.php?id=115&entryid=576c23208f94ac7035355e0f) are something they are supposed to deal with. Of course call from a different country. Just in case. ETA: Or go to The Outlaws 😮 ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/3 "2022-05-01T00:54:18Z")
This plot has a familiar ring. He could take refuge with an Amish community, living and dressing as one of them, helping build a barn and getting it on with a hot Amish woman. Or: If there’s truly a risk that the local cops have been infiltrated by the Hell’s Angels, there are other agencies he could contact\*, like the state Attorney General’s office, the F.B.I. etc. \*assuming this story is for real. 🤔 ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/4 "2022-05-01T01:00:38Z")
There is only so much the law can do, so I am going to make a radical suggestion: Invite them to send a lawyer over to examine the books. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/5 "2022-05-01T01:30:22Z")
The Hells Angels don’t randomly decide someone is dealing in drugs and stripping (whatever that meant). So J should tell Z to tell her why they are really after him. ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/6 "2022-05-01T01:59:04Z")
Ah. Apparently, he cheated on a girl, and the girl happened to be a girl whom the Hells Angels “pass around”, so she decided to make his life hell by telling the gang that he was slinging drugs and moving in on their territory. Z went to the police station and was met there by a heavily tattooed police officer who basically didn’t believe a word he said. “What did you _do_ to this girl?”, that’s what he said. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/7 "2022-05-01T02:03:49Z")
Has he considered baking them a lasagna? ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/8 "2022-05-01T03:30:34Z")
> [@ekedolphin](#): > > Ah. > > Apparently, he cheated on a girl, and the girl happened to be a girl whom the Hells Angels “pass around”, so she decided to make his life hell by telling the gang that he was slinging drugs and moving in on their territory. > > Z went to the police station and was met there by a heavily tattooed police officer who basically didn’t believe a word he said. “What did you _do_ to this girl?”, that’s what he said. I would say that this is pretty good evidence that your friend J should dissociate herself from Z as soon as possible. If he’s willing to admit to his current girlfriend that he cheated on a previous girlfriend, I can only imagine that what he really did was much worse. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/9 "2022-05-01T07:12:42Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > If he’s willing to admit to his current girlfriend that he cheated on a previous girlfriend, I can only imagine that what he really did was much worse. If you’re referring to Z admitting to J that he cheated on a former gf - note, according to OP, J isn’t Z’s girlfriend. They are cousins. OP, clarify: Is this in Ontario Canada, or Ontario California (or one of [about 7 other Ontario cities in the United States](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ontario_(disambiguation)))? ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/10 "2022-05-01T07:15:44Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > OP, clarify: Is this in Ontario Canada, or Ontario California (or one of [about 7 other Ontario cities in the United States](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ontario_(disambiguation)))? Considering the Hells Angels are the topic, I’d assume the one in California. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/11 "2022-05-01T07:16:40Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > Considering the Hells Angels are the topic, I’d assume the one in California.   That’s what led me to ask. ---
**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/12 "2022-05-01T07:49:10Z")
According to Wikipedia there are 1,240 active Hell’s Angels in Canada with 5 thousand more associates. Also apparently they killed over 184 people in a decade long struggle against another Canadian biker gang in the 90s which lead to them having complete control of the criminal biker underground in Canada. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/13 "2022-05-01T07:57:25Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > According to Wikipedia there are 1,240 active Hell’s Angels in Canada with 5 thousand more associates. Also apparently they killed over 184 people in a decade long struggle against another Canadian biker gang in the 90s which lead to them having complete control of the criminal biker underground in Canada I would not have known that. I assume the OP is referring to Ontario, CA because San Bernandino is where the HAs started and inland/southern CA was very much their territory back in the day when my father was running meth for them (he was never a member, just a hanger-on) and they maintain strong associations with the region. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/14 "2022-05-01T11:41:06Z")
The Hells Angels have been in Canada for a long time. And they have been part of some brutal gang wars - [Quebec Biker Wars - Hells Angels Vs The Outlaws - Popeyes Vs Satans Choice - The First War - 72 Dead](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IB_CBWmCafo&ab_channel=AmbitiousSLacker). ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/15 "2022-05-01T13:53:52Z")
The story lacks credibility. There is more to it or it’s made up. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/16 "2022-05-01T13:57:44Z")
I must say, it is rather difficult to take at face value. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/17 "2022-05-01T14:25:21Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > Considering the Hells Angels are the topic, I’d assume the one in California. I’ve been assuming the Nine-Oh-Nine for the same reason. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/18 "2022-05-01T14:45:08Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > The Hells Angels don’t randomly decide someone is dealing in drugs and stripping (whatever that meant). Are there really stripper clubs where Hell’s Angels are the featured attraction? Must be a specialized clientele. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/19 "2022-05-01T15:08:49Z")
If he misread that audience I can understand why they got mad. ---
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2022, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742/20 "2022-05-01T16:02:29Z")
My first guess would be that Z is on meth and is paranoid. This is a very common story with meth heads. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-does-one-get-the-hells-angels-off-your-back/963742.md?page=2)