# How early should someone lose their virginity? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 31, 2003, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083 "2003-07-31T07:50:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/41 "2003-08-02T23:59:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Krokodil \* > \*\*There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this. People don’t magically become mature on their 18th birthday; sexual, physical, emotional and intellectual maturity are all separate and unrelated processes. Most guys get laid as soon as they can figure hout how. Most girls get laid after they’ve been asked a few times by a few different guys. > > I can’t make an Ann Landers-type quiz here, but I guess it comes down to a few questions: > > –Can you bring yourself to ask someone for sex? > > –Can you buy condoms from the matronly old woman at the prescription counter without blushing or giggling? > > –Are you ready for the responsibilities of parenthood? > > –Do you think love scenes in movies at all resemble real life as anyone has ever experience it? > > –Are you gonna freak out when you see your girlfriend’s un-PLAYBOYlike A-cup breasts, body hair, and veins on her skin? > > –Do you know going in that everybody’s First Time is invariably a huge disappointment? > > Oh, here’s the biggest secret about sex, the one I wish someone had told me before “going in”: The first time you have sex with a particular girl (I’m assuming you’re a guy, Aslan, and that ladies are what you crave), you’re going to gain an unexpected insight into her personality. Physical and emotional tics she tried hard to conceal will become very obvious very quickly. Demure girls will turn out to be bossy, street-tough girls will turn out to be unexpectedly timid, and so on. Some of these insights may freak you out, and you’ll find out first-hand why those loutish jock guys you hate and envy sometimes dump their girl after the first time they have sex. Yep, you’ll gain these insights about your gal. > > And she’ll gain some similar ones about you. > > Good hunting! \*\* Now… in other threads, Aslan has said he’s bi. Now… move that pregnancy to a maybe… and switch the gender pronouns and stereotypes. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/42 "2003-08-03T00:00:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by kputt \* > \*\*TO never have sex.😛 😉 \*\* Yeah. Funny. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/43 "2003-08-03T00:01:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Q.N. Jones \* > \*\*You make them sound like specimens with a rare and curious illness. \*\* You mean it isn’t? I thought terminal virginity had no cure and constant suffering involved. ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/44 "2003-08-03T00:03:03Z")
Hopefully 23 yrs. old this year. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![ForumBot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ee59a6/32.png) [@ForumBot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ForumBot)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/45 "2003-08-03T00:06:30Z")
Personally, I’m waiting until I’m out of high school, and encourage others to do the same. I have enough stress already. ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/46 "2003-08-03T00:42:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mockingbird \* > \*\*You mean it isn’t? > > I thought terminal virginity had no cure and constant suffering involved. \*\* Not all virgins suffer or choose to suffer. Sex can be a “Would be nice” rather then “must have” thing. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/47 "2003-08-03T17:30:09Z")
I was sixteen and it was pure misery which permanently damaged my relationship with my sister, parents and men in general. After that I abstained until I met my husband and we waited two years (until our wedding night) ---
**Author:** ![SuperNova](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea666f/32.png) [@SuperNova](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuperNova)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/48 "2003-08-04T02:50:05Z")
Another vote here for “When you are ready.” Emotionally and physically, of course, one must be ready. Also one must be able to take the steps neccessary to make sure it is done safely. Also, while some people surely disagree, I’d say the first time should be in a committed relationship. In the case of my friends, this has rarely been what happened. While I know for certain this is a generalization, I know many girls who have been hurt by the first person they slept with, but no guys. I think there is a hormonal explanation for this, but don’t ask me to provide it. For that reason, I am reluctantly saying that guys are probably mentally ready for it at a younger age than girls. Another support for this may be that girls have more direct consequences (i.e., pregnancy). While disease is always an issue, few girls are mentally prepared to deal with an unwanted pregnancy at younger ages. And while guys may have to deal with it also, it isn’t growing in _their_ body. All this being said, it still is on a case by case basis. Some girls may be ready younger, and some guys never.😉 ---
**Author:** ![Salem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Salem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Salem)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/49 "2003-08-04T03:16:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lieu \* > \*\* > For me it was 17. For my daughter it’ll be 52. Everyone’s different. \*\* Fercrying out loud, **lieu** , 52? What are you one of those “let the little darlings express themselves” types? Damn liberals. Retirement age, I say. It’ll keep them busy and I’ll be dead. Works for me. (Mother of three angels…) ---
**Author:** ![Vyvanse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/e47774/32.png) [@Vyvanse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vyvanse)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2013, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/50 "2013-07-13T23:36:05Z")
I think that you should be at least 25 years old, and have a good handle on who your lifetime soulmate is. ---
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2013, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/51 "2013-07-13T23:39:12Z")
> [@Vyvanse](#): > > I think that you should be at least 25 years old, and have a good handle on who your lifetime soulmate is. Curious, what country do you live in? And what is the legal age for consensual sex, military service, and alcohol consumption? And what is your primary credo/ethical system/religion? ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2013, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/52 "2013-07-13T23:48:21Z")
n/m ---
**Author:** ![InternetLegend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/internetlegend/32/13154_2.png) [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/53 "2013-07-14T00:06:26Z")
If you were thinking about it in 2003, probably by now. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/54 "2013-07-14T00:07:48Z")
Does sex with a ten year old zombie count as losing your virginity? ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/55 "2013-07-14T00:55:43Z")
Of course, everybody has to make their own decisions… yadda yadda yadda. Generally, I’d say 16 would be a fine age. Between 16-18 is probably when most people lose it. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/56 "2013-07-14T01:16:17Z")
Pretty early. Probably in the afternoon before your parents get home from work. That’s what I did anyway and I always make good decisions. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/57 "2013-07-14T01:23:12Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > Does sex with a ten year old zombie count as losing your virginity? If you have sex with a ten year old zombie, does it count as pedophilia, necrophilia, or both? ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/58 "2013-07-14T06:34:38Z")
I was 18. Wish I had done it at 13, when I had a big ol’ crush on my math teacher. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2013, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/59 "2013-07-14T14:43:25Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > Does sex with a ten year old zombie count as losing your virginity? It would probably count as a felony at least. ---
**Author:** ![Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f04885/32.png) [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qin_Shi_Huangdi)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083/60 "2013-07-15T05:10:43Z")
When one is mature enough to be married. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-early-should-someone-lose-their-virginity/192083.md?page=4)