# How great is my wife? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 20, 2017, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-great-is-my-wife/782661 "2017-03-20T23:37:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2017, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-great-is-my-wife/782661/1 "2017-03-20T23:37:33Z")
Those of you who have met her know how beautiful, witty and charming she is (ask **Qadgop** ), but now she has gone above and beyond. Seems I have a birthday coming up, and she is pulling out stops I didn’t know existed. To wit: Today’s UPS driver brought me three items - a bottle of Irish whiskey, a t-shirt and a poster. “So what?” you ask. Let me explain. The whiskey isn’t available around here that I can find. She sent off to Chicago for it. And it is well worth it. I am sipping a dram of it as I type. Honeyed bliss. The t-shirt is yellow. The [silk screen design](https://images.wolfgangsvault.com/linda-ronstadt/mens-t-shirt/memorabilia/ZZZ001516-MR.jpg) on the front is old. Real old. She actually found a Linda Ronstadt shirt that uses the original silk screens. The third item is special in a way only she would know. 40 years ago I acquired a Linda Ronstadt poster that I loved. It has been behind the pissoire in every place I’ve ever lived since then. (Linda has seen my dick more than any other woman on the planet!) But we just moved, and the old poster has seen much better days. I was prepared to write it off, but my wonderful, wonderful wife tracked down an original printing, near-mint quality of it. Museum archive framing, too, so the humidity of a steamy bathroom won’t degrade the poster. So it’s back in the place of honor. She knew I would miss it, even though I never said anything about it. My wife. I think I’ll keep her. Even though I don’t deserve her. I wonder what I’m getting tomorrow? ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2017, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-great-is-my-wife/782661/2 "2017-03-20T23:44:28Z")
Hopefully, an inspiration just as good for what to give her when it’s her birthday. ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2017, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-great-is-my-wife/782661/3 "2017-03-20T23:47:25Z")
> [@Dendarii\_Dame](#): > > Hopefully, an inspiration just as good for what to give her when it’s her birthday. Not down with one-upping presents. That shit spirals out of control, quick. If she’s as great she sounds, she’s not expecting it, either. ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2017, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-great-is-my-wife/782661/4 "2017-03-21T03:26:06Z")
Yeah, I’d say she sounds like a keeper Silenus. You’re not going to find many people who can read your mind. Even Linda Ronstadt can’t do that! ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2017, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-great-is-my-wife/782661/5 "2017-03-21T03:51:33Z")
What a sweetie! ---
**Author:** ![Olentzero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/90ced4/32.png) [@Olentzero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Olentzero)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2017, 9:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-great-is-my-wife/782661/6 "2017-03-21T09:56:19Z")
There is one-upping, and there is knowing someone so well that you know _exactly_ the gift to get them. **Silenus’** wife may not be expecting to be outdone, but that doesn’t mean he can’t find that one thing that will both make her happy and convince her than the effort she put into tracking down quality Ronstadt merch and damned good whiskey was well spent. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2017, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-great-is-my-wife/782661/7 "2017-03-21T11:54:28Z")
> [@Olentzero](#): > > There is one-upping, and there is knowing someone so well that you know _exactly_ the gift to get them. This, for sure. For my gf’s birthday in January, I got her a hatchling red-footed cherry head tortoise. Everyone who heard about it (friends and family) was puzzled, but I know her so well I _knew_ it would be the “best gift ever” type thing. Happy Birthweek, **silenus**! ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2017, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-great-is-my-wife/782661/8 "2017-03-24T19:48:05Z")
She’s great, you definitely don’t deserve her. Greet her from me, if you would. I treasure the memory of our time together, our spouses and you and I. Especially I. 😃