# How have you changed as you’ve aged **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 28, 2021, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929 "2021-03-28T22:33:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2021, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/21 "2021-03-29T11:32:54Z")
I was born an atheist and never strayed. I find myself becoming a harder atheist over time, a bit athe-ier and less flexible. I’ve always been a cynic, and that’s progressed a bit to the more cynical end of the spectrum. ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2021, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/22 "2021-03-29T14:08:47Z")
More patient with kids and old people, willing to listen more interrupt less. Less tolerant of entitled consumers obsessed with material things. More than willing to cut toxic humans out of my life than before. Less likely to laugh along with the crowd while I cringe inside, more likely to call out bullshit when I hear it. More likely to concede the dance floor to the younger crowd, but will still elbow my way front and center at a concert ( been awhile). I curse more, cry less, laugh just as loud and just as introverted but not as shy. Oh getting laid less but been there done that got the tire tracks. Lol. YMMV! ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2021, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/23 "2021-03-29T16:12:26Z")
> [@BippityBoppityBoo](#): > > I’m waiting to see what @Gatopescado says… I get a little worse every day. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2021, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/24 "2021-03-29T18:39:46Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > I get a little worse every day. We’ve noticed. ---
**Author:** ![Deeg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/deeg/32/2955_2.png) [@Deeg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deeg)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2021, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/25 "2021-03-29T18:48:07Z")
I’ve become more tolerant–but not always more liberal–as I’ve gotten older. I’ve met people from different areas of the country (and world) with different backgrounds and I realize that people that think differently from me have rational and valid reasons (even if I still think they’re wrong). I’m not necessarily more cynical but I try to keep in mind the incentives behind decisions and that people are largely self-serving. ---
**Author:** ![74westy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/74westy/32/3950_2.png) [@74westy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/74westy)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2021, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/26 "2021-03-29T19:03:21Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > I get a little worse every day. Every day and in every way I’m getting worser and worser. ---
**Author:** ![ArtBeforeScience](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@ArtBeforeScience](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArtBeforeScience)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/27 "2021-03-30T01:17:25Z")
I think my hormones calmed down and I mistook this for being calmer and wiser. If you put this wise old head back on my 15 year old body, I’d be back to giddiness. Grumpier? Well, less patience for fools, better at avoiding them, politer when confronting them, less need to win every argument. Overall more contented with myself. Even when I’m very unhappy about some situation, I’m still happy underneath. Mental focus has changed. Harder to get into that concentration zone. Lower energy, less frenetic. However, once the brain-motor is running, it lasts longer. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/28 "2021-03-30T02:33:06Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > We’ve noticed. I guess this is better than being overlooked. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/29 "2021-03-30T05:19:21Z")
> [@tripthicket](#): > > Two things come to mind fairly quickly: > > Driving has been a lot less exasperating/infuriating. Oh, the idiots are still out there, and I’ve always driven with an eye out for them, but I’m much more relaxed about the whole thing. I don’t have time pressures, such as getting to a job, so I don’t really care if I get caught up in traffic. 20 or 30 years ago, I would get mad multiple times in any given drive; now, it’s ‘Hey, that’s a good song!’ or ‘I really like this news commentator.’ > > I’ve heard it said that a young man is a Liberal/Democrat, but when he gets older, he becomes a Conservative/Republican. It was the opposite for me. I spent the first 20 years of my adult life in the USAF, most of them in a very rigid and unyielding career field (Air traffic control, where you MUST do it THIS WAY with no room for personalization at all). My salad days were during the heyday of Ronnie’s reign, and while I didn’t pay attention to politics at all, I was steeped in that environment, where the rules were THE RULES. They were there for a reason. If you were rebelling against The Rules, well, then, you were wrong. > As I was doing processing to retire from the USAF, I recall a civilian counselor laughing at me as I expressed my take on The Rules, but I gained no clue at the time. > It was many many years later, after undergoing therapy, that I started delving into the reasons why I behaved and believed as I did, among other issues. At roughly the same time, I was a card-carrying SDMB Lurker, with an occasional uneducated outburst. Some have called this place an echo chamber, but it’s here, especially during the last administration, that I started _paying real attention_, and I’ve migrated into a worldview of ‘Who’s helping people and who’s not/doing the opposite?’ That has me coming down on the side of ‘Help people’, and thus, long story too long already, I went from unconscious conservative to deliberate Liberal as I aged. I have no issue with older conservatives who are rational, thoughtful, informed and compassionate, but in my personal life I’ve seen a lot of people who I respected when they were in their 40s and 50s turn into mindless, morally bankrupt right wing cultists in their 60s and 70s. Its one of the things that scares me about aging, is watching people you used to respect become gullible, irrational people who lose the respect of family members. Its like watching people become shells of themselves because fear of multiculturalism and propaganda really turned them into something unrecognizable. I hope I don’t turn into that as I age. It doesn’t even have to be about politics either, its just watching people become extremely dumb and gullible while convinced they are the smartest person in the room. Watching people ignore the well being of the next generation or be actively hostile to their interests and be dogmatically arrogant about it. For me aging has been mixed. The physical health issues suck, but mental health generally gets better. And to the degree that it doesn’t improve, you learn your triggers, vulnerabilities and ways to sooth your mental health issues so they aren’t as bad. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/30 "2021-03-30T05:54:52Z")
> [@DorkVader](#): > > Have you gotten grumpier, happier? More tolerant, less tolerant? Is it context dependant? I don’t think I’m less happy, but I’m definitely grumpier in the sense of being more bothered by small annoyances, and with a tendency to be more vocal and less reserved about making my feelings known. So yes, less tolerant and also less restrained. Fortunately, with old age has also come some wisdom if not patience, so I’m not constantly going off about every little thing. When my annoyance gives voice, it’s usually justified. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/31 "2021-03-30T06:07:29Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > Fortunately, with old age has also come some wisdom if not patience, so I’m not constantly going off about every little thing. When my annoyance gives voice, it’s usually justified. This, exactly. When I was younger, if something set me off, no matter how minor, everybody knew about it. Nowadays, it’s like rain on a duck’s back: it bugs me, but it rolls away easily. There are issues in which I will engage, and in which I feel my argument is justified, but those are few and far between. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/32 "2021-03-30T06:27:42Z")
I’m more apt to go to the crazy side of things just for S&Gs. I don’t care how people view me as long as I get a giggle from peanut gallery (the grandwrex) ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/33 "2021-03-30T12:32:20Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I’m more apt to go to the crazy side of things just for S&Gs. Oh, how shocking! We never suspected. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2021, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/34 "2021-03-30T21:54:34Z")
That’s just bad bad bad. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2021, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/35 "2021-03-31T01:48:52Z")
Y’all think you’re so funny!!!😁 ---
**Author:** ![Esprise\_Me](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprise_me/32/2947_2.png) [@Esprise\_Me](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprise_Me)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2021, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/36 "2021-03-31T02:39:28Z")
I’m guessing I may have to hit 40 at least before I can say that I’ve “aged,” but damnit, I wanna play too. I think perhaps the biggest change has been my ability to accept what I can get from people, instead of bemoaning what I can’t or rejecting them for not giving me enough. If someone is flaky (perpetually late, cancels last-minute, etc.), I’m more apt to see it as their personal failing instead of as disrespect toward me, and to accommodate it by making plans they can’t screw up. For example, I won’t meet them one-on-one outside the theater, but they can join a group of us hanging out at a bar, whenever they feel like showing up. I can dive with people whose politics I dislike (being underwater does wonders for shutting people up anyway.) If I always have to be the one initiating plans, I don’t read too much into it and just initiate as often as I feel like it, and accept that those overtures won’t be matched. If someone does that thing where they drop off the face of the earth for months on end, I remind myself they’re probably not dead and I’ll hear from them again eventually. If someone keeps saying “we need to hang out more!” every time we get together, but then they always have flimsy excuses, I just assume that the frequency with which we get together now is as good as it’s going to get. If someone is perpetually going through one crisis or another, always needing an ear but never having one for me, I can gently set some boundaries without either cutting them out of my life or arguing with them about being a better friend. I can let people say wrong things and just not correct them. Except on the internet; everyone on the internet needs to be set straight. ---
**Author:** ![asahi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asahi/32/8693_2.png) [@asahi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asahi)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2021, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/37 "2021-03-31T02:53:05Z")
I’m more cynical and less tolerant, but more patient, more understanding, and more forgiving. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2021, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/38 "2021-03-31T07:43:19Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Y’all think you’re so funny!!!😁 That’s just funny funny funny. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2021, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/39 "2021-03-31T07:47:18Z")
I’ve gotten happier and more tolerant. I’ve chilled out, maaaaan. Oh, and I turn 60 in June. So I’m not all that old. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2021, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929/40 "2021-03-31T08:20:44Z")
I used to start a multitude of projects and quickly get overwhelmed. I now start slower. Think about awhile and think some more. Pace myself and finish before I start something else. Or I’m just lazier. 😁 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-have-you-changed-as-you-ve-aged/938929.md?page=3)