# How long do you sit in the toilet?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [October 6, 2024, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514 "2024-10-06T20:53:37Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Pardel-Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pardel-Lux)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/1 "2024-10-06T20:53:37Z")
Continuing the discussion from [Things you think you know, but you do not](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-think-you-know-but-you-do-not/1002166/115):
> [@Things you think you know, but you do not](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-think-you-know-but-you-do-not/1002166/115):
>
> 65 here. I’m sure I’ll catch flack for this but I always sit down….because there’s reading material (no not THAT! Readers digest, etc.)
I read again and again – and not only in this board – that people read while sitting on the toilet. Magazines, comics, books even! And nowadays, the telephone, it seems. Here is what confuses me: when I sit in the toilet, I finish quickly. A toilet is not a comfy chair, the light is not ideal for reading, I have better places to read. I don’t remember ever having read while shitting or peeing. It very seldom takes more than a minute or two anyway.
So I wonder: do you really read in the toilet? If you do: why? How long does your business in the loo take? Do you read because you get bored otherwise, or to distract you from the actual business?
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### Author:  [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/2 "2024-10-06T20:55:28Z")
I don’t sit IN the toilet at all.
Depends on what reading material I might find engrossing as well as making sure the last drops get out. I also dislike all the splatter from standing up.
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### Author:  [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/3 "2024-10-06T20:58:14Z")
I sit on the toilet, in the bathroom. But enough nitpicking.
I don’t read or do anything but concentrate on what I’m doing, which usually only takes 3-4 minutes tops. That is probably because I don’t attempt to go until I feel the need to go; and also because I take a daily fiber supplement so I don’t get backed up. I have never known anyone who spent a long-enough time on the toilet that they would feel the need to entertain themselves by reading (this sample consists of a relatively small number of people I have ever lived with, maybe a dozen or 15, including roommates, relatives, and significant others).
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### Author:  [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/4 "2024-10-06T21:00:23Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#):
>
> I have never known anyone who spent a long-enough time on the toilet that they would feel the need to entertain themselves by reading (this sample consists of a relatively small number of people I have ever lived with, maybe a dozen or 15, including roommates, relatives, and significant others).
Same here.
And I’ve always had a slight aversion to those Jokes for the John books. They just kinda ick me out.
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### Author:  [@snowthx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snowthx)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/5 "2024-10-06T21:02:57Z")
There are some “entertainment” products for the toidy…
> **[Uncle John's Action-Packed Bathroom Reader](https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Uncle-Johns-Action-Packed-Bathroom-Reader/Bathroom-Readers-Institute/Uncle-Johns-Bathroom-Reader-Annual/9781667206035)**
>
> The 37th annual Bathroom Reader from Uncle John and his team is filled with highly entertaining and informative articles that will keep you on the ...
Yeah, I go in there mission-focused as well, and only when, uh, prompted. No reading, or anything else for me.
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### Author:  [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/6 "2024-10-06T21:03:31Z")
I visited a friend’s apartment once where she had a book like that. It smelled strongly of urine. So I’ve made a point of never bringing printed material into the bathroom.
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### Author:  [@Pardel-Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pardel-Lux)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/7 "2024-10-06T21:04:16Z")
I guess I should have spent my time **on** the toilet reading some English grammar books. Prepositions…
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### Author:  [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/8 "2024-10-06T21:04:54Z")
When I was young my diet and digestive system was very slow. I would sit in there for at least ten to twenty minutes sometimes. But things have mellowed since then, not sure exactly why, and now my daily visits are less than five.
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### Author:  [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/9 "2024-10-06T21:08:49Z")
> [@Pardel-Lux](#):
>
> I guess I should have spent my time **on** the toilet reading some English grammar books. Prepositions…
Well, you made me smile!
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### Author:  [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/10 "2024-10-06T21:22:48Z")
> [@Pardel-Lux](#):
>
> Here is what confuses me: when I sit in the toilet, I finish quickly. A toilet is not a comfy chair, the light is not ideal for reading, I have better places to read. I don’t remember ever having read while shitting or peeing. It very seldom takes more than a minute or two anyway.
Well, feel blessed to always having had a healthy and quick digestion, not all of us are, I never was. In my younger days, a typical stay for me for number two was 15 minutes, and I was always glad if it worked out after that time. I had to clear my mind in the meantime, so I always had reading material. With age, that changed and I have become quicker on the loo, but now I have IBS which isn’t a pleasure either.
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### Author:  [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/11 "2024-10-06T21:23:49Z")
Somewhere, I still have these … in a box.
Ah, my misspent youth…
[**The Great American Bathroom Books**](https://thegreatamericanbathroombook.com/)
Heartily recommended.
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### Author:  [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/12 "2024-10-06T21:54:10Z")
> [@Pardel-Lux](#):
>
> Here is what confuses me: when I sit in the toilet, I finish quickly.
What is confusing you may be that you think everyone can finish quickly. This is not so. One of the many things that varies considerably about humans is their digestive systems.
Also, some people living in busy households may use the bathroom as a refuge – about the only place where they’re allowed to be alone.
When I was young, for me it was often the second of those reasons. Now that I’m old and live alone, it’s more likely to be the first.
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### Author:  [@Kron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kron)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/13 "2024-10-06T21:58:05Z")
> [@thorny\_locust](#):
>
> Also, some people living in busy households may use the bathroom as a refuge – about the only place where they’re allowed to be alone.
+1
and some characters to please the nanny-bot
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### Author:  [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/14 "2024-10-06T21:58:06Z")
I often read on the toilet. I’ve never gotten pee on my reading material, and I’m finding it hard to imagine how that could even happen.
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### Author:  [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/15 "2024-10-06T22:20:55Z")
While I am normally done with the daily business quickly there have been times in my life when things were backed up or the trains reluctant to leave the station. Sometimes reading for a few minutes allows me to relax sufficiently for that which should to depart.
Mostly, though, the bathroom library shelf is for reading during hot, steamy baths that are good for my arthritis, particuarly in the winter.
As for reading material smelling of … waste products… while I can imagine scenarios where that _could_ occur it really shouldn’t happen. Put down the reading _before_ moving to actions that involve clean up and don’t touch it again until after you wash your hands properly.
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### Author:  [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/16 "2024-10-06T22:26:58Z")
In the case of the smelly bathroom reader I experienced, I think the problem was that the book never left the bathroom, where it sat atop the toilet tank. So it absorbed odors over time.
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### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/17 "2024-10-06T23:14:32Z")
Time on the commode is a threat to authoritarians. Henry Ford hired men’s room goons to police it. We were warned nearly 300 years ago when Lemuel Gulliver visited the academy at Laputa:
“He advised great statesmen to examine into the diet of all suspected persons; their times of eating; upon which side they lay in bed; with which hand they wipe their posteriors; take a strict view of their excrements, and, from the colour, the odour, the taste, the consistence, the crudeness or maturity of digestion, form a judgment of their thoughts and designs; because men are never so serious, thoughtful, and intent, as when they are at stool”
And in fact, Stalin did re-route the Kremlin plumbing during Mao’s visit for just this purpose.
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### Author:  [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/18 "2024-10-06T23:23:01Z")
First off, unless you’ve bought a new book for yourself and smelled the nice aroma, which I recommend.
Is there a reason to smell a person’s books?
I have been known to hide in the bathroom. Umm. Kinda alot. The closet is my favorite place, tho’. I keep a bottle of water stashed in there in case I get thirsty. Yeah, I roll weird.
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### Author:  [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/19 "2024-10-06T23:29:30Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#):
>
> Is there a reason to smell a person’s books?
To be frank, the smell was unavoidable. It may be that _anything_ absorbent left in the bathroom is going to acquire odors so I avoid leaving stuff there. (The bathroom rug and of course the towels are washed regularly.)
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### Author:  [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)
#### Post date: [October 6, 2024, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-do-you-sit-in-the-toilet/1008514/20 "2024-10-06T23:38:31Z")
Huh. My bathroom smells slightly is pee immediately after i relieve myself, and the smell is gone by the time the toilet finishes flushing. My husband doesn’t miss the toilet, and never leaves an odor of urine behind. I wonder about your aim, frankly. 😉
We have a bathroom fan for smellier activities.
I mostly read either my phone or an ebook that can’t into the bathroom when i did, and we no longer leave reading material in the bathrooms. (Pre-cell-phones, we did.) But smelly reading material was never a problem back in the days when i (and several of my friends) left books to live in the bathroom.
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