# How long would it take medieval people to figure out a car? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 23, 2014, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330 "2014-09-23T10:15:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mr.Kobayashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4af34b/32.png) [@Mr.Kobayashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Kobayashi)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/1 "2014-09-23T10:15:28Z")
I love messing with the timeline, so this time I’m sending back a 2014 [Land Rover Defender](http://www.kahndesign.com/imgNews/14383.jpg) 4x4 offroader back exactly 1000 years, to the estate of [Ulfcytel Snillingr](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ulfcytel_Snillingr) in East Anglia - just because I like his name. The keys are in the ignition, the doors are unlocked and there’s a full tank. It’s a 5 speed manual transmission. No documentation or user manuals have been left so they can’t cheat. Sent back a rugged Land Rover since ‘roads’ at the time were, at best, dirt tracks. But will they even figure out how they turn this thing on? Will they work out how to drive this miraculous horseless carriage and how long does it take them? ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/2 "2014-09-23T10:23:37Z")
Sadistic bastard you gave them a manual. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Kobayashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4af34b/32.png) [@Mr.Kobayashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Kobayashi)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/3 "2014-09-23T10:32:03Z")
> [@stui\_magpie](#): > > Sadistic bastard you gave them a manual. 😃 Well, I can’t make things too easy for the hapless serfs. They might just see it as work of the Devil and set fire to it, after all. ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/4 "2014-09-23T11:10:57Z")
> [@stui\_magpie](#): > > Sadistic bastard you gave them a manual. 😃 The manual gearbox is the only real option anyway, automatics suck. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 11:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/5 "2014-09-23T11:16:27Z")
Never. They’ll take it apart and make a fortune selling the high-quality metal, rubber, upholstery, etc. Or if the parking brake is released and it’s in neutral, they may turn the frame into a wagon/carriage after getting rid of “unnecessary” heavy parts like the engine. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/6 "2014-09-23T11:20:00Z")
Further – even if they had a mind to experiment and see how it worked, they’d run down the battery (and therefore be unable to start it) with the lights, radio, wipers, etc., long before they correctly combined the actions of pressing the clutch and turning the ignition. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Kobayashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4af34b/32.png) [@Mr.Kobayashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Kobayashi)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/7 "2014-09-23T11:23:44Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > Further – even if they had a mind to experiment and see how it worked, they’d run down the battery (and therefore be unable to start it) with the lights, **radio** , wipers, etc., long before they correctly combined the actions of pressing the clutch and turning the ignition. _“You’re listening to K-FDL, all feudalism all the time! So what’s the deal with Ethelred the Unready? More hits coming up, the hottest Gregorian chants from the top 40!”_ ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/8 "2014-09-23T11:29:00Z")
“Nice ride Ulfie. But I’d have spent the extra 4 goats and dozen chickens for the positraction and self leveling suspension.” ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/9 "2014-09-23T12:08:07Z")
Never. Six serfs would move in. I imagine it’s warmer than a hut in the winter. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/10 "2014-09-23T12:14:35Z")
If you are sending it to East Anglia there’s no real need to go back 1000 years. I kid, I kid, They’ve had the internal combustion engines there for over a decade now and transistor radios are no longer consider witchcraft. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/11 "2014-09-23T12:54:47Z")
Longer than it would take them to wreck it. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/12 "2014-09-23T13:46:57Z")
Their primitive intellect wouldn’t understand alloys and compositions and things with…molecular structures. They don’t even have electricity. It would take these screwheads almost 800 years to even develop the concept of “on”. They’d probably burn it to kill the evil spirits inside. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/13 "2014-09-23T13:55:08Z")
> [@Mr.Kobayashi](#): > > They might just see it as work of the Devil and set fire to it, after all. Well, it IS a Land Rover. Just how wrong would they be? Yes, they’d slay the Awful Beast and the resulting fuel explosion would set back the The Renaissance centuries. Of course the findings of archaeologists and historians might be interesting… Dear Diary, I have Smote the Evil Black Knight which had the effrontery to refuse response to my hails and challenges, even after being presented with my name and my titles, bestowed by God and King. Its arrogance can only mean that it is French and I have sent word to Plantagenet to invade immediately, as is our Holy Right. Truth be told, the only good thing that’s come from France is Droit du Seigneur. Note to Self: I must make sure to eat well and get my rest as there are several weddings next week… ---
**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/14 "2014-09-23T14:31:45Z")
not to hijack a good thread, but this is on a related theme: Suppose you only go back about 100 years and a bit? And suppose you find the world’s smartest living human being—Albert Einstein himself, in the year 1880 (okay, I know—ol’ Albert would have been just a baby then, so use your imagination again, and let’s say that he’s already an adult) Now, instead of a car, you give Mr. Einstein an airplane. Specificially–a B2 Stealth Bomber. A huge black triangular wedge, standing on 3 very weak and spindly legs, wth small wheels. Would he know what it is? Remember, this is 1880; the most hi-tech devices are steam powered, but this black wedge has no smokestack or boiler. And nobody believes that human flight is feasible (other than hot air balloons). I think that Mr. Einstein would be confused… Perhaps his first guess would be to notice that the wheels and legs are disproprotionally small, so perhaps he would conclude that the machine is designed to float on water. Or perhaps he would guess that it is a movable platform, a helpful thing to stand on while doing… well,doing something. Is there any way the greatest scientist of the age figure out that it is a flying machine? But at least we can be pretty sure he wouldn’t destroy the thing because he’s afraid of witchcraft 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/15 "2014-09-23T14:41:26Z")
> [@Count\_Blucher](#): > > Well, it IS a Land Rover. Just how wrong would they be? > > Yes, they’d slay the Awful Beast and the resulting fuel explosion would set back the The Renaissance centuries. Of course the findings of archaeologists and historians might be interesting… > Dear Diary, > > I have Smote the Evil Black Knight which had the effrontery to refuse response to my hails and challenges, even after being presented with my name and my titles, bestowed by God and King. > Its arrogance can only mean that it is French and I have sent word to Plantagenet to invade immediately, as is our Holy Right. > > Truth be told, the only good thing that’s come from France is Droit du Seigneur. > Note to Self: I must make sure to eat well and get my rest as there are several weddings next week… * * * I may need to apologize for this post. While its possible that Droit du Seigneur may have been practiced on occasion in the Dark Ages, the resulting genetic horror show of inbreeding, even 1000 years later, would be a total and complete insult to the fine people of East Anglia. _ **we now resume the above thread, already in progress** _ ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/16 "2014-09-23T14:45:17Z")
> [@chappachula](#): > > Remember, this is 1880; the most hi-tech devices are steam powered, but this black wedge has no smokestack or boiler. And nobody believes that human flight is feasible (other than hot air balloons). They’d had gliders for several decades by than. Some of which had the same general shape as the stealth bomber. I’d guess Einstein would get as far as figuring it was a self powered flying machine. Indeed, I think a lot of the well read population at that time would get to that conclusion pretty quickly. If he waited a few years, he might even hear of Hertz’s work and suss out the general idea of “stealth”, though that’s probably more of a stretch. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/17 "2014-09-23T18:10:53Z")
> [@chappachula](#): > > not to hijack a good thread, but this is on a related theme: > Suppose you only go back about 100 years and a bit? > And suppose you find the world’s smartest living human being—Albert Einstein himself, in the year 1880 (okay, I know—ol’ Albert would have been just a baby then, so use your imagination again, and let’s say that he’s already an adult) > > Now, instead of a car, you give Mr. Einstein an airplane. Specificially–a B2 Stealth Bomber. > A huge black triangular wedge, standing on 3 very weak and spindly legs, wth small wheels. > Would he know what it is? > > Remember, this is 1880; the most hi-tech devices are steam powered, but this black wedge has no smokestack or boiler. And nobody believes that human flight is feasible (other than hot air balloons). > > I think that Mr. Einstein would be confused… Perhaps his first guess would be to notice that the wheels and legs are disproprotionally small, so perhaps he would conclude that the machine is designed to float on water. Or perhaps he would guess that it is a movable platform, a helpful thing to stand on while doing… well,doing something. > Is there any way the greatest scientist of the age figure out that it is a flying machine? > > But at least we can be pretty sure he wouldn’t destroy the thing because he’s afraid of witchcraft 🙂 Einstein would have figured it out. Surely he would have been familiar with [Leonardo da Vinci’s sketches](http://imgc.allpostersimages.com/images/P-488-488-90/71/7106/V8MV100Z/posters/leonardo-da-vinci-flying-machine.jpg) from 400 years previous. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/18 "2014-09-23T18:59:50Z")
> [@Simplicio](#): > > If he waited a few years, he might even hear of Hertz’s work and suss out the general idea of “stealth”, though that’s probably more of a stretch. Considering the concept of radar was still 50+ years out, I doubt the low observability features would even occur to them. I am quite sure you could police up a few smart folk who would deduce it was some form of flying machine. Getting it off the ground on the other hand would be a completely different nightmare. I doubt you would be able to find a big enough piece of flat smooth ground with a suitable surface to allow a jet to take off and or land without destroying the landing gear and or the entire plane. Granted you might see some huge leaps forward in metallurgy, physics, and engineering just from having samples of materials for study and being presented with a working example of what is possible. ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/19 "2014-09-23T19:38:03Z")
Or go back in time with a smartphone or tablet, something with a touchscreen interface and capable of recording video… "As you can clearly see, I have captured your souls in this magick window, give me all your valuables and comely wenches, and I may see fit to release your souls… Or even a firearm, Naah, Ash already did that one… ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2014, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330/20 "2014-09-23T19:53:19Z")
> [@drachillix](#): > > Considering the concept of radar was still 50+ years out, I doubt the low observability features would even occur to them… Working radar was fifty years out, but the concept and some proof of concept experiments date from the 1890’s. But even with a vague idea of the possibility of radar, it would admittedly take a pretty good guess to use that to explain a stealth planes shape and material composition. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-medieval-people-to-figure-out-a-car/699330.md?page=2)