# How long would it take the US military to wrap up kaiju? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 14, 2013, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506 "2013-07-14T21:06:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/21 "2013-07-15T15:49:43Z")
That’s what cracked me up about _The Avengers_, not that I didn’t enjoy it - seriously, you guys do know we have this enormous military and stuff, right? You’ve got an invasion of a bunch of dudes on hoverbikes and a couple bigger carrier-types. We’ve got the biggest military the world has ever seen. We can handle it without a dude with a bow and arrow, a lady with a handgun, two hand to hand guys and one mobile weapons platform. I mean, that’s not super efficient. ETA - sorry, three hand to hand guys, one of whom is very large. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/22 "2013-07-15T15:58:02Z")
Well, yesbut, in the Avengers they didn’t have time to scramble any of that the local national Guard arrived after most of the fighting was over. The thing is, with the Avengers you can move in a squad and get the firepower of a Regiment, commanded by Patton. But that excuse wont work for Pacific Rim ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/23 "2013-07-15T16:24:48Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > That’s what cracked me up about _The Avengers_, not that I didn’t enjoy it - seriously, you guys do know we have this enormous military and stuff, right? You’ve got an invasion of a bunch of dudes on hoverbikes and a couple bigger carrier-types. We’ve got the biggest military the world has ever seen. We can handle it without a dude with a bow and arrow, a lady with a handgun, two hand to hand guys and one mobile weapons platform. Bear in mind that, in THE AVENGERS, the world’s biggest military simply fired one shot to solve the problem; said Mobile Weapons Platform just helped aim it. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/24 "2013-07-15T17:05:34Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > That’s what cracked me up about _The Avengers_, not that I didn’t enjoy it - seriously, you guys do know we have this enormous military and stuff, right? You’ve got an invasion of a bunch of dudes on hoverbikes and a couple bigger carrier-types. We’ve got the biggest military the world has ever seen. We can handle it without a dude with a bow and arrow, a lady with a handgun, two hand to hand guys and one mobile weapons platform. I mean, that’s not super efficient. > > ETA - sorry, three hand to hand guys, one of whom is very large. Yeah, it should have been: Loki: I have an army! Tony Stark: _We_ have an army. And a Hulk. ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/25 "2013-07-15T17:19:43Z")
> [@](#): > > Bear in mind that, in THE AVENGERS, the world’s biggest military simply fired one shot to solve the problem; said Mobile Weapons Platform just helped aim it. To be fair, they likely didn’t expect that we’d be able to fire a weapon through their access point. And it’s quite likely they had a heck of a lot more to send, plus weapons we never saw. I mean, you’d don’t underestimate Thanos of al people, and Loki is a smart cookie. We may have never seen anything more than a sacrificial vanguard intended to lure a nuclear strike itself, although it’s also possible Loki just didn’t think we had the spine. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/26 "2013-07-15T18:24:43Z")
> [@ExTank](#): > > I was thinking what a company of M1 Abrams could do. Definitely! I was just thinking in terms of what an infantry company could bring to bear. I didn’t even mention mortars! ---
**Author:** ![EllisDee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellisdee/32/4531_2.png) [@EllisDee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EllisDee)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2013, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/27 "2013-07-15T20:11:34Z")
> [@Ranchoth](#): > > Apparently not too deep in the Pacific, at that. And in a fixed location, with a monster-spawning schedule that’s almost predictable. > > just _station a garrison underwater at the rift, permanently,_ and shoot/bludgeon any monsters as soon as they come through. Cheeser! Camping a spawn point is the fastest way to get blacklisted. ---
**Author:** ![Airk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Airk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airk)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/28 "2013-07-16T14:53:55Z")
Do we have to play this stupid game again? What movie shall we pick apart next? Maybe we’d like to go over some of the “classics”. Like Star Wars. And why a society with enough technological know how to build highly maneuverable single-pilot fighters that can fly through space and make faster than light jumps couldn’t make them remote controlled and capable of engaging opponents BVR. Blah, blah, FFS people. Giant robots! Monsters! Just roll with it. For whatever reason, we tried and it didn’t work. Maybe explosives just don’t hurt them. Who CARES? ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/29 "2013-07-16T15:02:41Z")
WE care. For we are… THE NIT-PICKERS. That and the movie was stupid to begin with. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/30 "2013-07-16T15:07:23Z")
There’s another thread about the movie that’s been fairly nitpick free. I don’t see a problem having a separate nitpick thread. And I thought the movie was outstanding, and was totally willing to roll with the giant-robot-dragging-a-cargo-ship-down-the-street-and-smacking-a-monster-upside-the-head-with-it conceit. But nitpicking can be fun too. ---
**Author:** ![LateComer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b5ac83/32.png) [@LateComer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LateComer)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/31 "2013-07-16T17:14:51Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > Lots of people bring this point up when talking about things like King Kong or Godzilla or other giant monsters, but why can’t we just imagine they have stronger bones than what we’re used to? To ants, us humans must be biological marvels, able to be a thousand times bigger and still move with such agility. The kaiju must be the same way, their organs and everything is simply proportionately stronger You have a cousin or something, don’t you, Cthul- something or other, who’s a big monstrous sea creature? ---
**Author:** ![MaxTheVool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MaxTheVool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaxTheVool)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/32 "2013-07-16T17:37:47Z")
> [@Airk](#): > > Do we have to play this stupid game again? What movie shall we pick apart next? Maybe we’d like to go over some of the “classics”. Like Star Wars. And why a society with enough technological know how to build highly maneuverable single-pilot fighters that can fly through space and make faster than light jumps couldn’t make them remote controlled and capable of engaging opponents BVR. Blah, blah, FFS people. Giant robots! Monsters! Just roll with it. For whatever reason, we tried and it didn’t work. Maybe explosives just don’t hurt them. Who CARES? There’s a big difference between “I claim that this one point about this movie was implausible, and let’s debate it, because it’s fun to debate things” vs. “I claim that this one point about this movie was implausible, and therefore the movie was not worth watching and was unfun”. Clearly everyone in this thread other than you is having a good time. Go away. ---
**Author:** ![Werekoala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7993a0/32.png) [@Werekoala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Werekoala)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/33 "2013-07-16T18:50:09Z")
One thing that I didn’t think about until just now that might have made it cooler and added implied backstory would have been having the crushed hulls of a few attack subs scattered around the rift. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/34 "2013-07-16T18:50:16Z")
> [@LateComer](#): > > You have a cousin or something, don’t you, Cthul- something or other, who’s a big monstrous sea creature? He’s not a monster, he’s misunderstood. And to get rid of another salacious rumor, Cthulhu is not a “sea monster”, he’s from the vast gulfs of darkness between stars. He just happens to be in the ocean right now ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/35 "2013-07-16T18:57:08Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > To get back on topic, I’m sure that, fanwanking, the reason conventional arms do so little damage is that they do have these super dense bones and armor that our weapons aren’t designed to penetrate, but a giant robot fist with rockets on the elbows can! 😃 It’s probably for the same reason as on Buffy the Vampire Slayer that bullets never worked against anything, but somehow hitting them really hard in the face always did. ---
**Author:** ![Werekoala](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7993a0/32.png) [@Werekoala](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Werekoala)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/36 "2013-07-16T19:35:33Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > It’s probably for the same reason as on Buffy the Vampire Slayer that bullets never worked against anything, but somehow hitting them really hard in the face always did. Not to mention the old **Superman** TV series. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/37 "2013-07-16T19:45:07Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > That’s what cracked me up about _The Avengers_, not that I didn’t enjoy it - seriously, you guys do know we have this enormous military and stuff, right? You’ve got an invasion of a bunch of dudes on hoverbikes and a couple bigger carrier-types. We’ve got the biggest military the world has ever seen. We can handle it without a dude with a bow and arrow, a lady with a handgun, two hand to hand guys and one mobile weapons platform. I mean, that’s not super efficient. > > ETA - sorry, three hand to hand guys, one of whom is very large. Hey, Thor can throw his hammer! (Not that I know whether the people who wrote The Avengers remembered it, as I haven’t watched it) The whole superhero genre starts by not making any economic sense. Hydra and her spawns alone have enough hench_men_ that if it wasn’t for their sexist hiring practices, their bigger bases could count as independent countries. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/38 "2013-07-16T20:16:27Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > It’s probably for the same reason as on Buffy the Vampire Slayer that **bullets never worked against anything** , but somehow hitting them really hard in the face always did. Tell that to Tara. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/39 "2013-07-16T20:39:47Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Tell that to Tara. ☹ Yeah, and unlike my issues here in this thread which are for fun, that one made absolutely no sense at all in a bad dumb way. Imagine exactly how that would have had to been fired to hit her. ETA - thanks, **MaxTheVool** , for explaining so succintly. ---
**Author:** ![Airk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Airk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airk)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2013, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506/40 "2013-07-16T21:09:35Z")
> [@MaxTheVool](#): > > There’s a big difference between “I claim that this one point about this movie was implausible, and let’s debate it, because it’s fun to debate things” vs. “I claim that this one point about this movie was implausible, and therefore the movie was not worth watching and was unfun”. Clearly everyone in this thread other than you is having a good time. Go away. The very first post contains a RANT and we are “clearly having a good time”? Well, okay then. Far be it from me to play the wet blanket on the wet blanket conversation. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-long-would-it-take-the-us-military-to-wrap-up-kaiju/663506.md?page=3)