Seriously though, I don’t think I’ve ever heard of that many birds getting splattered on windshields. I think the only creature I ever killed with my car was a cat, and it was suicidal. Or seemed to be. It was back in Texas, and I remember it ran in front of my path, safely clearing past me, then stopped and jumped back into my path, right underneath my front left wheel.
I have hit 4 - or rather, they hit me. All four were on the same road within the same 2 week period.
It was springtime, so perhaps the birds were distracted?
The first bird just flew into a back side window. I saw it cartwheel off into the ditch.
Next bird killing happened a few days later. Two birds were swooping and loop-de-looping around and the two birds smashed into the sides of my car - one on each side.
The last bird was a Kamikaze. I was coming up to a stop sign and had only begun to slow down when a bird came out of nowhere and divebombed into the front of my car. All I could see was a wing sticking straight out from the hood like it was raising it’s “hand” to me. When I came to the stop, it slid out of sight in a vibrating manner, sort of like a cartoon. When I got to work, I trepedatiously walked to the front of the car, expecting major carnage, but found nothing. It must have fallen off somewhere along my route.
I started to wonder if I should get a bird stamp for the side of my car…
I voted two, although one was only a probably.
The first was about 13 years ago. The bird was sitting in the middle of the road. I expected it to move, but it didn’t, so at the last second I aimed to go over it with the middle of the car. Of course, it took off halfway through and flew into my back tire. I saw it flapping in the road, but it probably did’t make it long. I’ve always wondered if I should have stopped and either brought it to a vet or put it out of its misery.
More recently, a robin dive-bombed my car. Came straight down out of a tree and into my grill. I had no time to react. I know that one was dead because when I go home it was still lodged in my undercarriage with a clearly broken neck.
Just one. It was a tiny sparrow type thing, and it landed on the road directly in front of my tire 
People were like “Shannon, it was probably sick if it didn’t notice the car.” And that didn’t make me feel better because I made it go from sick to dead! I didn’t take it particularly well because it’s only the second thing I’ve ever killed in 19 years of driving. Well, 19 now and probably 15 years at the time.
Just one small sparrow-like bird for me, too. Landed in the road facing away from me, I think it just didn’t put two and two together and never saw me coming at 40mph. Was plenty small enough to have been fine if it hadn’t happened to land exactly in the path of my driver’s side tires, with no time for me to react at all. Tink, tink, and nothing but a smooth flat spot in the road.
I was driving off my college campus, a very liberal arts college in the northwest. It was early in the morning. Something came out of the tall grass at the side of the road and flew right in front of my car. I hit it, but didn’t run it over. I went back and found it was a juvenile owl. It was fresh and in good shape, so I took it to a friend to stuff it and add it to the college’s specimen collection.
I’ve killed two birds with my car, having held a license for a little over 40 years. Also killed one bird with an aircraft - it dented the leading edge of one of the aircraft’s wings.
Have had 2 very near misses with kangaroos as well.
One. It was a really windy day and the wind blew a bird into a collision with my car.
Two off the windshield and one on a motorcycle (does that count?).
The bird the motorcycle hit was a titmouse and it exploded in feathers when it hit the headlight. Kinda like fireworks, but worse (at least for the bird). Same motorcycle also knocked down a deer, but that’s another story.
The best airborne hit I had was a field mouse I got with a 3/4 ton Ford Van. Driving down I30 between Texarkana and Little Rock. A hawk swoops down and grabs dinner from the land between the lanes and begins to make off with the little guy in his talons. Because of the weight, he has trouble gaining altitude and is coming in low across my lane. I think “I’m going to have to paint a hawk on the side of this van” when he jettisons his cargo right in front of me. The hawk shoots up and the mouse drops. I hear a slight “tunk!” and look in my rear view mirror and see this mouse sliding down the interstate at about 60 HPH, behind me. When I stop for gas, I look at the bumper and see a red spot of blood.
You gotta be pretty good to hit a mouse with the front bumper of a 3/4 ton Econoline. The titmouse wasn’t nothin’ compared that mouse.
excavating (for a mind)
Twice for me (to my knowledge). Both times it was when there was a flock of (first time parakeets, second time galahs) feeding on the side of the road who took to flight as I approached. In the avian melee that ensued, I hit them.
Urban birds seem to be a bit more vehicle-savvy…country birds are just dumb, especially when the grain-haulers drop barley/canola/corn along the road on their way to the depots.
Never hit a 'roo or an emu or wombat yet. 
Based on posts above I think I’m more at the Torquemada end of the scale. The number would be well into the hundreds.
A previous post on this subject:
I don’t kill birds when driving but a few have committed suicide by flying into my windshield.
I do a lot of traveling pulling a 5th wheel camper. It has a pretty high avian body count. Many times I don’t even know it until I stop and see the bird carcass lying in the pickup bed. Based on the large venturi* effect swirling thru the truckbed area, I can only assume I’m seeing a fraction of the actual kills (most would be blown out after falling).
My pet theory is that birds recognize cars vs large trucks and climb accordingly upon their approach. The front of my pickup says “car” to their brains and they don’t expect the 11 ft high camper immediately behind it, and don’t gain enough altitude. (height difference in the pic)
*I’ve lost surprisingly heavy objects due to the wind in there when going down the highway.
Reading all the descriptions, I have no memory of anything like that happening–except once when a black squirrel threw itself under my wheel (I came back later and gave it a funeral)–so I guess if I had hit a bird, I would have known it, and my bird body count is zero.
2, both sparrows I believe. Both hit the front of my car and flew over the roof. I believe I was on a highway for both.
No birds that I know of. As far as I know, my total vehicular slaughter (vertebrates only) comprises two deer and one rabbit. The rabbit bothers me more than the deer for some reason. It was such a sickening sound, and it came right at the start of a weekend road trip with a friend. Despite being one of the least susceptible to superstition people I know (and I hang out with a lot of rationalists), it is the one time I can remember experiencing something that felt like an omen. Fortunately I was able to shake the feeling, and the rest of the trip went great, but I still remember that awful feeling both of ending an innocent life for no reason and of impending doom foretold.
I’ve hit two birds that I’m aware of. First was a sparrow that melded with the grill. The second was a goose that would have been safe except for hitting the radio antenna and spiralling out of control. I’m pretty sure the goose didn’t survive.
The oddest bird related driving issue I’ve had was while I was driving a tractor trailer during the winter in northern Manitoba a number of years ago. In about a 5 mile stretch, there were dozens of ptarmigans on the shoulder of the highway. I don’t know what attracted them to the shoulder. I suspect they were interested in the road salt or pebbles. But the birds were too stupid to move as the 80,000 pounds and 60’ of truck was passing a couple of feet away from them. I don’t think any of them were hit by the truck, but they got sucked up in the wake of wind and tossed around like bowling pins. The view in my rear view mirrors showed them spinning and tumbling around on the road behind the truck as soon as I passed them. Stupid birds.
And that’s why George Washington will be the bloody arch-Zampnor of the New Zealand-Chilean Terran Quad-reign one day. Hope you’re happy.
I don’t see how i’d ever kill a bird. It took me sixteen years before i finally nailed a squirrel, and those little fuckers are basically suicidal.
Only one I’m aware of was the one I hit, in a Gary Larson moment, on my way to my job at the humane society. I didn’t brake fast enough, heard a tiny pop from under my wheels, and continued: nothing in the rear view mirror or on my car when I later looked, but I’m pretty sure I know what the pop was.