# How Many Crap Loads Go into a Shit Ton? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 14, 2018, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501 "2018-11-14T13:41:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Marine\_One](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/marine_one/32/3461_2.png) [@Marine\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marine_One)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/21 "2018-11-15T01:42:26Z")
When you measure it, make sure it doesn’t hit any fans. ---
**Author:** ![K2500](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f6c823/32.png) [@K2500](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/K2500)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/22 "2018-11-15T03:00:50Z")
> [@TroutMan](#): > > I agree with the first two, but I’m surprised by the metric conversion. Given our tendency in the U.S. to exaggerate and get overly dramatic about all our problems, I’d have thought our shit tons would be in reality a little smaller than a shite ton. Tendency to exaggerate, aka, full of shit… ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/23 "2018-11-15T03:32:23Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > Wouldn’t that be 'tonnes"? who gives a shite? ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/24 "2018-11-15T03:33:41Z")
there are 800 shitloads to a US crap ton. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/25 "2018-11-15T04:48:20Z")
Well then what’s the ratio of shitloads to fuckloads? ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/26 "2018-11-15T05:25:24Z")
> [@simster](#): > > who gives a shite? Piss Off, you fuckin’ BlackGuard! Or something like that… ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 10:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/27 "2018-11-15T10:50:48Z")
> [@Magiver](#): > > there are 800 shitloads to a US crap ton. Wait, why is a shitload less than a crap ton but more than a crap load? ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/28 "2018-11-15T12:42:39Z")
For what it’s worth, I understand Holy Shit to be measured in kilotonnage (kT). As in, when they set off the Trinity shot, there were numerous “Holy shit!” observations. This waters down the ratio, from, say one Holy Shit to 10kt, because there were multiple Holy Shit observations. I would postulate that there were at most 424 Holy Shits to an approximate 20 kilotons ([cite](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trinity_(nuclear_test))); there were 425 present, but Oppenheimer quoted the _Bhagavad Vita_ instead. So, this gives us the ratio of one Holy Shit to 0.0212 kT, or one Holy Shit to 21.2 tons of shit. Long tons, of course, because of the long faces when kilotonnage of shit is sent in anger, and recieved by surprise. Tripler I’ll be submitting this to the Royal Academy forthwith. ---
**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/29 "2018-11-15T12:54:10Z")
May I interrupt this thread to mention an old thread on a related subject? An important issue which we Dopers proudly solved: proper units of measurement [Where is smithereens?](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=290967) > [@](#): > > Mass: 25.375 smithereens equal 1 flinder > > Volume: One shitload equals 25 bushels, the capacity of the John Deere’s MS 1102G; their smallest ground-driven manure spreader. One Hell of a shitload equals 660 bushels, the capacity of the MS 1260, their largest hydraulic-powered manure spreader > > Area: Seventeen all over Hell’s Half Acres equals 1 way the fuck and beyond. > > Time: 5 million waiting here with my thumb up my ass equals one Jump Jesus. 20 Jump Jesuses equal one Hell freezes over > > Indeterminates: One couldn’t care less equals 1 could care less. 40 milliequvalents of could/couldn’t care lesses equals one better than a sharp stick in the eye. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/30 "2018-11-15T13:42:03Z")
> [@Tripler](#): > > For what it’s worth, I understand Holy Shit to be measured in kilotonnage (kT). As in, when they set off the Trinity shot, there were numerous “Holy shit!” observations. This waters down the ratio, from, say one Holy Shit to 10kt, because there were multiple Holy Shit observations. I would postulate that there were at most 424 Holy Shits to an approximate 20 kilotons ([cite](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trinity_(nuclear_test))); there were 425 present, but Oppenheimer quoted the _Bhagavad Vita_ instead. So, this gives us the ratio of one Holy Shit to 0.0212 kT, or one Holy Shit to 21.2 tons of shit. Long tons, of course, because of the long faces when kilotonnage of shit is sent in anger, and recieved by surprise. > > Tripler > I’ll be submitting this to the Royal Academy forthwith. Is it true that only the Pope & the Dalai Lama are responsible for creation of all Holy Shits? What about regular llamas? ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/31 "2018-11-15T14:42:21Z")
With the permission of **Two Many Cats** , i’d like to expand this thread to include the subject “Things that are measured in Crap Loads (or Shit Tons)”. One would be Taco Bell food. E.g., “You can get a crap load of Taco Bell food for twenty bucks”. ---
**Author:** ![Ashtura](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ashtura/32/2963_2.png) [@Ashtura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashtura)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/32 "2018-11-15T15:56:49Z")
But how many Katie Courics are in a shit ton? ---
**Author:** ![Marine\_One](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/marine_one/32/3461_2.png) [@Marine\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marine_One)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/33 "2018-11-15T16:18:51Z")
What about a **boatload**? I assume this would enter into this subject because some ships have a **poop deck**. So, even though ships come in different sizes, there must be a Law of the Sea that descibes how to load a boatload of whatever. “Arrr! I want 14 boatloads to be loaded! And none of this fancy shitload nonsense! Where is my parrot?” ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/34 "2018-11-15T17:41:53Z")
Boatload is a measure of volume, not weight, BTW. Five hundred snootfuls make up one boatload. Snootfuls are measured in cubic zirconia. One cubic zirconium is the volume of a standard snuffbox. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/35 "2018-11-15T19:06:02Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Boatload is a measure of volume, not weight, BTW. Five hundred snootfuls make up one boatload. Snootfuls are measured in cubic zirconia. One cubic zirconium is the volume of a standard snuffbox. > > Regards, > Shodan And boatloads are nautical measurements, which NEVER make any sense to non-sailors. ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/36 "2018-11-15T19:26:05Z")
> [@Marine\_One](#): > > What about a **boatload**? > > I assume this would enter into this subject because some ships have a **poop deck**. > So, even though ships come in different sizes, there must be a Law of the Sea that descibes how to load a boatload of whatever. > > “Arrr! I want 14 boatloads to be loaded! And none of this fancy shitload nonsense! Where is my parrot?” I guess this thread is undergoing a sea change. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/37 "2018-11-15T20:31:49Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > One more than you can carry. Well, my other hand is full of wishes. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2018, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/38 "2018-11-15T21:07:26Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Boatload is a measure of volume, not weight, BTW. Five hundred snootfuls make up one boatload. Snootfuls are measured in cubic zirconia. One cubic zirconium is the volume of a standard snuffbox. > > Regards, > Shodan A boatload is also half a buttload. Seven buttloads=one shitton. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2018, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/39 "2018-11-16T01:47:56Z")
> [@Spiderman](#): > > Is it true that only the Pope & the Dalai Lama are responsible for creation of all Holy Shits? > > What about regular llamas? No, the Pop and Dalai Lama are responsible for _Holy Craps_. But while some floating divinity may have your soul and crap, a nuclear weapon will end your shit. Regular llamas are just ‘all-pack-a-d’ full of baloney. Tripler See what I did there? ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2018, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501/40 "2018-11-16T01:50:56Z")
Here’s an honest question: what’s “a snort?” I’ve heard the term in regards to taking a sip, a snifter, a pull, a taste, a “_wee dram_” or a shot of a whiskey. What exactly is ‘a snort’? I do know that a few snorts will make ‘a buzz.’ Too many will make “a drunk.” Tripler Just curious… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-crap-loads-go-into-a-shit-ton/824501.md?page=3)