# How Many Hot Buttons Can You Count In This Story? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 23, 2005, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166 "2005-01-23T00:05:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/21 "2005-01-23T04:33:54Z")
The OP missed one big one - the guy was named _Francois_. I think we all know what that means. The French are now coming over to America to attack our meter-maids. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/22 "2005-01-23T04:53:38Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > The OP missed one big one - the guy was named _Francois_. I think we all know what that means. The French are now coming over to America to attack our meter-maids. Over my dead body! ::grabs shut gun:: ::puts shot gun away:: Nah, the maids can handle the French. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/23 "2005-01-23T06:02:31Z")
:: Sigh :: There’s a French maid joke in here somewhere, but damned if I can come up with it. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/24 "2005-01-23T11:02:47Z")
> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > Oh, I almost forgot the obligatory Pitriol: > > May rqabid llamas with end-state syphilis piss in his Starbucks double latte. Those llamas are imported all the way from Arqabia. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/25 "2005-01-23T16:00:29Z")
> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > May rqabid llamas with end-state syphilis piss in his Starbucks double latte. Prqeview is yourq frqiend. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/26 "2005-01-23T16:05:36Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Prqeview is yourq frqiend. Smqartqass. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Salem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Salem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Salem)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/27 "2005-01-23T17:16:42Z")
> [@SkipMagic](#): > > Those llamas are imported all the way from Arqabia. Is that Eaqstern Arqabia or Weqstern? I hear there’s a big difference in the amount of foqam. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/28 "2005-01-23T17:28:17Z")
It’s Sqaudiq Arqabia, aqtually. I understqand the bqin Lqaden fqamily hqolds the Stqarbucks cqontract. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/29 "2005-01-23T20:49:58Z")
I knew it! Starbuck’s coffee _is_ the Weapon of Mass Destruction! (At least it is for me. Stupid acid reflux.) ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/30 "2005-01-23T20:58:58Z")
I counted 13,383,816 hot buttons. ---
**Author:** ![Noone\_Special](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/noone_special/32/2863_2.png) [@Noone\_Special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noone_Special)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2005, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166/31 "2005-01-23T21:18:20Z")
> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > It’s Sqaudiq Arqabia, aqtually. I understqand the bqin Lqaden fqamily hqolds the Stqarbucks cqontract. All those who were not uite uick enough to get in their uip about a uaint typo, please ueue uickly and uietly on the left. whaqt? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-hot-buttons-can-you-count-in-this-story/286166.md?page=1)