# How many Jews in a cabal? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 24, 2006, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415 "2006-12-24T04:27:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/1 "2006-12-24T04:27:35Z")
[I keep hearing about Jewish cabals](http://observer.guardian.co.uk/world/story/0,,1978405,00.html), but the number is never specified. How many Jews _does_ it take to make a cabal? ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/2 "2006-12-24T06:54:48Z")
Depends how thick you want it to be. Fiber-optic Jews make better cabals than the old copper Jews. ---
**Author:** ![LVgeogeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b19c9b/32.png) [@LVgeogeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LVgeogeek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/3 "2006-12-24T07:46:19Z")
A cabal is defined pretty much as a small group of secret plotters, such as against a government or person in authority. No actual number defined. I think when shit hits the fan people just like to blame the Jews (or minority of the week) to stir the shit and cloud the waters to hide something hence the “Jewish cabal” getting the twit fired from her job. Could it be she was just an embarrasment to her company, did her job poorly? Just another person looking to put the blame on others instead of taking responibility for themselves. Who knows, It is late and I need to go to sleep. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/4 "2006-12-24T07:47:29Z")
Well, how many minyans in a cabal? How many cabals in a synagogue? You ought to be able to work this out, yourself. ---
**Author:** ![mks57](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9bd4f/32.png) [@mks57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mks57)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 8:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/5 "2006-12-24T08:46:19Z")
I’m still waiting for my official “International Zionist Conspiracy” membership card and bumper sticker. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/6 "2006-12-24T14:38:07Z")
The first rule about Jewish cabals is, you don’t talk about Jewish cabals. The second rule about Jewish cabals is, you don’t talk about Jewish cabals… ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/7 "2006-12-24T14:52:35Z")
Historically, a [Cabal](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cabal_Ministry) was composed of High Church Anglicans, not Jews at all. They musta stolen it (insert diatribe about ethnic-stereotype sharp business practices here ad lib). 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/8 "2006-12-24T14:57:44Z")
Always thirteen Jews in a cabal. If you find less, that means you’re not looking hard enough. If you find more, that means you’ve uncovered \*two \* cabals, so keep looking until the number of Jews found equals some multiple of thirteen. ---
**Author:** ![freckafree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freckafree/32/3050_2.png) [@freckafree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freckafree)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/9 "2006-12-24T15:23:02Z")
[QUOTE=cmkeller] Depends how thick you want it to be. Fiber-optic Jews make better cabals than the old copper Jews. [/QUOTE] ::snerk:: ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/10 "2006-12-24T15:25:16Z")
Always two, no more, no less. A master and an apprentice. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/11 "2006-12-24T17:06:01Z")
[QUOTE=Bricker] Always two, no more, no less. A master and an apprentice. [/QUOTE] Actually it translates better as “teacher” and “student.” ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/12 "2006-12-24T17:09:39Z")
Hey, whaddaya call a Jewish cabal when it’s composed of Spanish Sephardic Jews? _Los caballeros_. [d&r] ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2006, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/13 "2006-12-24T18:03:40Z")
[QUOTE=cmkeller] Depends how thick you want it to be. Fiber-optic Jews make better cabals than the old copper Jews. [/QUOTE] This is true, and the modern day cabals stand up better on the floor of the Atlantic ocean, too. A truly devout caballer will get up, say his morning prayers, kiss his mother goodbye and head towards the wharves, calling over his shoulder, " Don’t wait up, I’m off to shpul ! " 😉 Cartooniverse, who wishes VERY badly that we had The Orthodox Jewish man emoticon back. ---
**Author:** ![Vlad\_Igor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/7feea3/32.png) [@Vlad\_Igor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vlad_Igor)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2006, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-many-jews-in-a-cabal/385415/14 "2006-12-25T01:22:16Z")
[QUOTE=Polycarp] Historically, a [Cabal](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cabal_Ministry) was composed of High Church Anglicans, … [/QUOTE] So, Nashotah House is in on it, too? 😉