# How Much Does a Turd Weigh? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [October 5, 2009, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667 "2009-10-05T14:29:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/1 "2009-10-05T14:29:37Z")
I mean I get that there will be lots of variation based on the “provider’s” age, diet, eating habits, bowel habits, size, etc. But in general, how much should a deuce from a 30-year-old, 200-pound male with a once-daily poop habit and a healthy diet weigh? ---
**Author:** ![Philster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/13edae/32.png) [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/2 "2009-10-05T14:46:52Z")
1-3 pounds on average. Weigh yourself. Take a duece. Weigh yourself. Not much more complicated than that. Fluids could be 1-2 pounds extra, too. Note on us of word ‘average’ : This means some are more and some are less, so the average is 1-3. More or less is still ‘normal’. Average does not mean normal. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/3 "2009-10-05T15:06:28Z")
> [@Philster](#): > > Weigh yourself. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/4 "2009-10-05T15:20:25Z")
> [@Philster](#): > > 1-3 pounds on average. > > Weigh yourself. > > Take a duece. > > Weigh yourself. > > Not much more complicated than that. > > Fluids could be 1-2 pounds extra, too. > > Note on us of word ‘average’ : This means some are more and some are less, so the average is 1-3. More or less is still ‘normal’. Average does not mean normal. 1-3 lbs? Unless you are lumping in urine to the weight as well that’s a pretty massive load. I’d guess most dumps are well under a pound. ---
**Author:** ![Tranquilis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tranquilis/32/3639_2.png) [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/5 "2009-10-05T15:22:41Z")
So, is anyone willing to take up the challenge of defining a ‘standard turd?’ 😃 ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/6 "2009-10-05T15:27:31Z")
I’ve actually done the weigh myself-drop a deuce-weigh myself thing, and the results have been ambiguous. Generally there is no change, sometimes there is a weight increase. Of course, household scales aren’t known for their razor-sharp accuracy, either. ---
**Author:** ![Lust4Life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecc23a/32.png) [@Lust4Life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lust4Life)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/7 "2009-10-05T15:27:53Z")
> [@Philster](#): > > 1-3 pounds on average. > > Fluids could be 1-2 pounds extra, too. > > Note on us of word ‘average’ : This means some are more and some are less, so the average is 1-3. More or less is still ‘normal’. Average does not mean normal. My god thats bigger then a bag of sugar ! How bigs your arse ? And you’re also pissing a pint or two pints on average. I most definitely am not going to use any toilet you’ve just been in !:eek: ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Awesome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a698b9/32.png) [@Captain\_Awesome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Awesome)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/8 "2009-10-05T15:38:54Z")
How long is a piece of… Anyway a scientific study of 1000 Iranian individuals returned a mean stool weight of of 349±131 g, with a median of 320 g ([Hosseini-Asl and Hosseini 2000](http://www.ams.ac.ir/aim/0034/asl0034.html)). Western stools are somewhat smaller, typically 80-120 g/day. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/9 "2009-10-05T16:17:32Z")
349 grams is roughly 0.8 pounds, so an average of 1-3 pounds per deuce seems a bit high. ---
**Author:** ![Darryl\_Lict](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7cd45c/32.png) [@Darryl\_Lict](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darryl_Lict)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/10 "2009-10-06T03:06:19Z")
> [@friedo](#): > > 349 grams is roughly 0.8 pounds, so an average of 1-3 pounds per deuce seems a bit high. Aren’t we talking about a single stool? Now, having seen a full wrap around turd that was bigger than imaginable, I would say that a larger than one pound turd is possible. I’m a partial owner of a commercial building and I’ve been assigned janitorial duties on more than one occasion. I do not spend an inordinate amount of time looking at turds. I think most people shit multiple turds per event. ---
**Author:** ![Darryl\_Lict](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7cd45c/32.png) [@Darryl\_Lict](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darryl_Lict)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/11 "2009-10-06T03:15:52Z")
Here’s a [site](http://www.babcias.net/kielbasa_sausages) with one pound sausage links, just for comparison purposes. Check out the one next to the apple. ---
**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/12 "2009-10-06T03:40:40Z")
> [@Philster](#): > > Weigh yourself. > [@Hampshire](#): > > 😃 :D:D ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Awesome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a698b9/32.png) [@Captain\_Awesome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Awesome)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 8:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/13 "2009-10-06T08:23:35Z")
> [@Darryl\_Lict](#): > > Aren’t we talking about a single stool? Now, having seen a full wrap around turd that was bigger than imaginable, I would say that a larger than one pound turd is possible. I’m a partial owner of a commercial building and I’ve been assigned janitorial duties on more than one occasion. I do not spend an inordinate amount of time looking at turds. I think most people shit multiple turds per event. Unfortunately the Iranian study dealt with the coloproctological standard of _mean daily stool weight_, rather than individual stool form, and weight subdivisions thereof. The [Bristol Stool Scale](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_Stool_Scale) is a relatively recent advance in the field, providing a means of quantitatively reporting stool shape, and providing an approximation of transit time. However information regarding their proportionate occurrence within a population, and individual component weights, is, thus far, an area of science that remains undetermined. The worldwide range of mean daily stool weight is between 72 and 470 g/day. ---
**Author:** ![bibliophage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bibliophage/32/7615_2.png) [@bibliophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophage)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/14 "2009-10-06T16:23:54Z")
Taber’s Cyclopedic Medical Dictionary says the average for healthy adult men is 100 to 200 grams a day. My digital scale says I just crapped 189 grams. Good thing I didn’t have that third helping of beans yesterday or I’d be unhealthy. ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/15 "2009-10-06T17:49:06Z")
> [@Lust4Life](#): > > My god thats bigger then a bag of sugar ! > How bigs your arse ? > And you’re also pissing a pint or two pints on average. > > I most definitely am not going to use any toilet you’ve just been in !:eek: Heh. After giving the OPs question some thought and purely in the interests of science I decided to find out. Unfortunately because I had ample pints of falling down water and a ruby last night, I’m still on the bog after 25 minutes. Just as soon as I’m done I’ll report back, don’t wait up;) ---
**Author:** ![Mangosteen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Mangosteen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangosteen)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/16 "2009-10-06T18:13:13Z")
Howard Stern had a 24 hour “crapathon” contest. “High Pitch” Eric won with, I believe, 12 ounces. The guy is pretty fat, over 250lb. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/17 "2009-10-06T19:06:06Z")
I tested my daily constitutional today on my digital scale. Stepped on it several times after urinating and it reported a weight of 165.8. Immediately post-evacuation 165.3. I would call today’s stool average in terms of size, perhaps a little bit on the light side. If my scale is reasonable accurate, I can easily beat 12 oz. I would guess I’ve laid 24 oz and bigger in my life several times (though there were extenuating circumstances like constipation or a gigantic 48-hour pork eating binge in Memphis and its environs). ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/18 "2009-10-06T19:14:52Z")
Is the OP working up to a new variation of the henway joke? ---
**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/19 "2009-10-06T20:03:21Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > I tested my daily constitutional today on my digital scale. Stepped on it several times after urinating … My brain went in a totally different direction as I read that. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2009, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667/20 "2009-10-06T20:14:55Z")
What happens to a turd deferred? Does it dry up like a raisin in the sun? Or fester like a sore– And then run? Does it stink like rotten meat? Or crust and sugar over– like a syrupy sweet? Maybe it just sags like a heavy load. Or does it explode? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-does-a-turd-weigh/512667.md?page=2)