# How much should I pay my friend for letting me stay with her? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 22, 2009, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-should-i-pay-my-friend-for-letting-me-stay-with-her/486952 "2009-02-22T16:28:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![RedRosesForMe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/91b2a8/32.png) [@RedRosesForMe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedRosesForMe)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2009, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-should-i-pay-my-friend-for-letting-me-stay-with-her/486952/21 "2009-02-23T23:39:45Z")
OK, now I’m a bit upset that I’m being accused of “cheaping out” on my friend. Doing a friend a favor is doing a friend a favor; if you think she should make money off of me sleeping on the couch then it’s no longer a favor. I appreciate her being there for me, but I also think that I’ve racked up about a thousand hours of free babysitting for her kids for the last 5 years, so I think treating me as a boarder is a bit unfair\*. I’m just trying to cover what extra expenses she’s incurred due to my stay, with a little extra as a thank you. \*Not that _she_ is treating me like a boarder, but a couple of posters here seem to think I should act like one. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2009, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-should-i-pay-my-friend-for-letting-me-stay-with-her/486952/22 "2009-02-23T23:53:04Z")
> [@RedRosesForMe](#): > > OK, now I’m a bit upset that I’m being accused of “cheaping out” on my friend. > > Doing a friend a favor is doing a friend a favor; if you think she should make money off of me sleeping on the couch then it’s no longer a favor. I appreciate her being there for me, but I also think that I’ve racked up about a thousand hours of free babysitting for her kids for the last 5 years, so I think treating me as a boarder is a bit unfair\*. I’m just trying to cover what extra expenses she’s incurred due to my stay, with a little extra as a thank you. > \*Not that _she_ is treating me like a boarder, but a couple of posters here seem to think I should act like one. I agree with you 100% on everything you’ve said here. However, she made it clear she wants money; she’s not doing a friend a favor. She fucked up by not detailing exactly what she wanted. Since you split the place with her for 3/4 of the month, the only number you can offer her is 3/4 of 1/2. She can always refuse to accept that much and throw out a “friendly” number, but I’m thinking she’s not going to do that. ---
**Author:** ![legalsnugs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/45deac/32.png) [@legalsnugs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/legalsnugs)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-should-i-pay-my-friend-for-letting-me-stay-with-her/486952/23 "2009-02-28T15:02:33Z")
I asked this in the other thread but you must not have seen it. So I’ll ask here. Did you give your friend the $150 yet? How did that go? ---
**Author:** ![gurujulp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ba9def/32.png) [@gurujulp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gurujulp)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-should-i-pay-my-friend-for-letting-me-stay-with-her/486952/24 "2009-02-28T15:26:30Z")
Not really possible to estimate unless you throw out numbers, if you are looking for a more concrete answer than 3/4 of 1/2. What is rent? Have you eaten _any_ of their food? Then you have an equal share in grocery, no matter that you have tried to eat little- learned that from the commune. How much you eat is a matter of personal preference- that you partake means you joined the group and are equal. Bath supplies? I count them as nothing, but to my roommate, if you touch it, you bought it… People vary. Give some hard data, and estimate high. ---
**Author:** ![gurujulp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ba9def/32.png) [@gurujulp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gurujulp)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-should-i-pay-my-friend-for-letting-me-stay-with-her/486952/25 "2009-02-28T15:35:41Z")
missed the edit Oh, and I gave my (good) friend (who would’ve let me stay free), for letting me and a three year old stay two weeks when I was down and out- $350 But as I said, details matter. Location is rather important. We (and he) live in a rather expensive town. In the same circumstance, in a different city/state, I would have offered to buy drinks on an extended eve and called it even. ---
**Author:** ![burundi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3ec8ea/32.png) [@burundi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burundi)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2009, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-should-i-pay-my-friend-for-letting-me-stay-with-her/486952/26 "2009-02-28T18:37:16Z")
> [@RedRosesForMe](#): > > Doing a friend a favor is doing a friend a favor; if you think she should make money off of me sleeping on the couch then it’s no longer a favor. I appreciate her being there for me, but I also think that I’ve racked up about a thousand hours of free babysitting for her kids for the last 5 years, so I think treating me as a boarder is a bit unfair\*. I’m just trying to cover what extra expenses she’s incurred due to my stay, with a little extra as a thank you. I don’t think you’re cheaping out on your friend, and I’m sure you’re a very good houseguest. However, I think your friend is an _awesome_ friend for letting you crash at her place. If I had two kids, was heavily pregnant with two more, and was trying to work out problems with my husband, the last thing I’d want would be a houseguest for almost a month. I would consider it a damn big favor, no matter how much free babysitting she gets out of it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-should-i-pay-my-friend-for-letting-me-stay-with-her/486952.md?page=1)