# How much toast can a toaster toast? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [March 18, 2000, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-toast-can-a-toaster-toast/8960 "2000-03-18T21:45:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![ASPA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b19c9b/32.png) [@ASPA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASPA)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2000, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-toast-can-a-toaster-toast/8960/21 "2000-03-21T00:28:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by NothingMan: > \*\*ASPA - by God you are the Walt Whitman of our generation. (Those were mighty funny.) > But seriously, how many times can I post to this site before my computer breaks down ? > Oh, and how many times can I wash my car before it disappears ? > And how many licks before you get to the center of a Tootsie-Roll Pop ? > \*\* THE NOTHINGMAN CAN Folks! Did everyone see member NothingMan? His post, I mean! It’s SUMthing grand (“F”-I-should-say-so, myself, as-I-MUST, so- BLAM!) His fiftyith one, (No HoHums!), it ran: "ASPA, THE GAUL, Your WALT WHITMAN… –ON SPAM! “NO, b’SERIOUSLY, REALLY FUNNY… …WIR THEM POEMS YOU’V SLAMMED!” What else did he say — ahCUMahhhN!.. …YoozDOOZ (Richard Simminz) YooDOOZ givz-a-DAMM!! So, folks, lemmee tell yA, That chap (so fantastic) has posed good questions — NO, SEVRAL — All SCHOLASTIC!!! All important to people and their peers, I suppose. (Or maybe, more deeply (philosophykable, (or rather, you may gather, (they’re each (a little… (…para… (sigh-KOT - Tish-a-bull (—if concerned for only insects, (or min’rals (or divisible sorts (of house haunted ghosts.) Regardless—here they are, self-contained in this… …vacuous, …eXtAKulous, exacting MISquote: “ARE WE LICKING OUR TIME, WHEN WE LOAD BROKEN APPLES – OR WASH UP INSIDE DISappearing ripe AUTOES – OR GET TO THE HEART OF WHAT’S ART’FICIAL AND NAT’UAL???” Well, Well, Well! Well, Well, Well …(!so!)… After this question he (at last) came to close: “THAMKS, HERO-ASPA, YOU’RE HELPING ME GROW!” Now, someone toss NothingMan the veritable wrappah from the last o’ ## theTOOT syROLLs! And watch him chew, aftah!!! The Nothingman Can © 2000 by ASPA ---
**Author:** ![ASPA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b19c9b/32.png) [@ASPA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASPA)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2000, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-toast-can-a-toaster-toast/8960/22 "2000-03-21T00:31:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by ASPA: > > ## And watch him chew, aftah!!! > > The Nothingman Can © 2000 by ASPA > > \*\* CHABGE LINE TO READ: And watch him pop aftah That oughta renda the thing readable, right! ---
**Author:** ![EnigmaOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d2c977/32.png) [@EnigmaOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EnigmaOne)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2000, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-toast-can-a-toaster-toast/8960/23 "2000-03-21T20:52:00Z")
{{{Pretty darned close. Mine’s a T-20 (why would the numbers go backward?), but you’re describing my toaster exactly. Does yours have a few clean Art Deco lines etched into the sides (upside-down T shape with circles at the intersection of the T)? We had to replace the original cord, as well. Other than that, it’s a peach!}}}—Ty No idea about the model numbers, but it could just be a variant thing. Actually, this thing is perfectly plain. No deco whatsoever. I got mine pretty much the same way, along with a bunch of other kitchen appliances (Oster 2-speed blender, etc.) from my mom. She was on the kick of an all new kitchen at the time. I believe she’s had to replace the newer appliances 3 times now, and she talked me into giving her the blender back about 5 years ago. (Shouldn’t have caved in on that one, but she’s my MOM!) 😉 * * * – **Kalél** [TheHungerSite.com](http://www.thehungersite.com) “If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.” “Well, there was that thing with the Cheese-Wiz…but I’m feeling **much** better now!” – John Astin, Night Court ---
**Author:** ![ASPA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b19c9b/32.png) [@ASPA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASPA)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2000, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-toast-can-a-toaster-toast/8960/24 "2000-03-21T23:05:00Z")
Quote A (From EnigmaOne) “Sounds like Tyler might have the same toaster I do Sunbeam Model T-35-” Quote B (From StoryTyler) “Pretty darned close. Mine’s a T-20…” Quote C (From EnigmaOne) “I got mine from my Mom.” HOLLYWOOD REINTERP (FROM ASPA) A “Anybody so&so seent that so&so S-T. He so&so got my so&so Toaster!” B “Look, so&so E-1, You so&so preety so&so close to gettin your toaster burnt, excusin’ me o’ theft! You wanna know who got y’so &so so&so, ask your so&so MUTHA!!!” C “My MUTHA ain’t stole so&so. In fact, I GOT my so&so toaster FROM my MOM! I WANT MY SO&SO toaster.” Any resemblance to actual situations of members of other real people is purely coincidental. Screenplay ©2000 ASPA Do not open file 'till Xmas. Do not replay except on DVD ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2000, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-toast-can-a-toaster-toast/8960/25 "2000-03-21T23:13:00Z")
The question is bread the topic is toast. ---
**Author:** ![ASPA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b19c9b/32.png) [@ASPA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASPA)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2000, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-toast-can-a-toaster-toast/8960/26 "2000-03-21T23:24:00Z")
[QUOTE] Originally posted by Markxxx: The question is bread the topic is toast. The question is bread and the topic is toast. The matter is dead and the topping’s a tomb. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-toast-can-a-toaster-toast/8960.md?page=1)