# How much you like to dance. Correlation with gender and sexual orientation. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 21, 2010, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394 "2010-11-21T01:31:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![MichaelEmouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/michaelemouse/32/101_2.png) [@MichaelEmouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MichaelEmouse)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/41 "2010-11-21T18:52:09Z")
> [@scifisam2009](#): > > Gay female (only one to vote so far!) and I love to dance. I’m not a great dancer, but I manage, and I’ve never been anywhere where people are actually judging you on your dancing. > > Wiki says he’s of English ancestry with unconfirmed Native American possibly in there somewhere. Or am I being whooshed? I think “brother” meant “gay”. ---
**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/42 "2010-11-21T18:58:51Z")
> [@Illuminatiprimus](#): > > I think the :dubious: was at his heterosexuality, which I personally see no reason to question (just because he’s an entertainer doesn’t make him gay and he doesn’t ping my dar at all). Yeah I don’t get it. I imagine Justin has gotten more ass than a merry-go-round pony. Probably more in six months than most of some of these fellas have seen in a lifetime. I believe we may be in the presence of sour grapes. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/43 "2010-11-21T19:00:54Z")
> [@Illuminatiprimus](#): > > I think the :dubious: was at his heterosexuality, which I personally see no reason to question (just because he’s an entertainer doesn’t make him gay and he doesn’t ping my dar at all). I was making the ha-ha. I don’t think he’s gay. I also think \*\*Jim \*\*was making a joke. Everyone carry on. ---
**Author:** ![Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8edcca/32.png) [@Superfluous\_Parentheses](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superfluous_Parentheses)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/44 "2010-11-21T19:02:42Z")
I like to dance. I’m quite bad at it but I enjoy it. It also helps that I’m now at a stage where I don’t care what other people think about my dancing “skills”. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/45 "2010-11-21T19:25:00Z")
Straight, male, white. I can do club dancing but it’s mostly a function of needing something to do at parties between the drinking and the long, in-depth conversations about how we _feel_ about life with my female friends.\* However, I love ballroom, and I’m adequate at swing and waltz and I can at least get out on the floor for foxtrots, salsa, and tango. I like those a lot more; I can’t improvise that well, so club dancing is difficult, while swing and waltz give a structure and format to fall back on. Gives me a moment to prepare my next move. \*Entirely platonic. This is a major part of my social life. I’m weird that way, and I’ve been called out by one of those girls when I got a drink and began having a similar conversation with a second girl. “I thought we had something special!” > [@MichaelEmouse](#): > > Most importantly, how much will learning to dance help me, personally, score? Straight women do not expect you to dance well. They know that you have two left feet. They merely hope that you’ll get out on the floor and just give it a try. There are eight-week dance classes that you can take that give you one class on waltz, swing, foxtrot, a couple flavors of salsa, tango, Lindy hop, and maybe another, too. Find a partner and take one of them. That’ll give you the barest notion of what you’re doing, and that will allow you to get out on the floor and learn more. The majority of women have seen swing dancing, tango, and waltz in movies, and they’re trained to think that this is true romance. They’ve also rarely had the opportunity to actually try it, and the Disneyfication of our culture dictates that some of them have fantasies about Prince Charming swooping in and sweeping them off their feet on the dance floor. If you can meet a girl and spend half an hour teaching her the basics of swing, waltz, or tango, that phone number is as good as in your pocket. Works like a charm. I’ve never had the opportunity to try it at a wedding reception, but I’d peg that as an ideal place to try it. ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/46 "2010-11-21T19:43:47Z")
> [@appleciders](#): > > The majority of women have seen swing dancing, tango, and waltz in movies, and they’re trained to think that this is true romance. They’ve also rarely had the opportunity to actually try it, and the Disneyfication of our culture dictates that some of them have fantasies about Prince Charming swooping in and sweeping them off their feet on the dance floor. If you can meet a girl and spend half an hour teaching her the basics of swing, waltz, or tango, that phone number is as good as in your pocket. Works like a charm. Sweet jesus, Prince Charming? Is _that_ how it works? And here I just thought they’d fuck me if I looked like I knew what I was doing with my humping equipment. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/47 "2010-11-21T20:10:28Z")
Straight woman who used to love to dance, but don’t know how I’d feel about it now. It’s been probably a decade since I last got the chance. I miss it, I think. ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/48 "2010-11-21T21:02:10Z")
> [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](#): > > Sweet jesus, Prince Charming? Is _that_ how it works? > > And here I just thought they’d fuck me if I looked like I knew what I was doing with my humping equipment. This is a distinction without a difference, depending on how you play your cards. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/49 "2010-11-21T21:30:16Z")
Good gravy, **apple** , and all this time I thought I was just glad to find someone who really enjoyed something I found to be fun. Considering that a lot of men don’t like dancing, when you find one who does, you feel like a lucky duck. If you really want to get into whatever base motivations women might have for seeking good dancers, sure, rhythm and confidence are key. I don’t know what all this Disney shit is about, though. ---
**Author:** ![davidw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c4cdca/32.png) [@davidw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidw)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/50 "2010-11-21T21:36:43Z")
> [@Balthisar](#): > > Male, straight, _white_. I wonder if there’s additional correlation there, because there’s a perception (including my own perceptions) that blacks and Latinos tend towards dancing more than white folk. There was a thread about this ages ago: [Why do straight white men hate to dance?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=199772) ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/51 "2010-11-21T21:59:08Z")
> [@Lissla\_Lissar](#): > > I love to dance. Haven’t really done it in a couple of years owing to small children. I like club dancing and I took about eight years of bellydance classes. I went to goth clubs, where the dancing tends to be much more, um, athletic and weird, but fun. > > My husband, a straight white guy, is quite a good dancer and likes to do it. Here, here, for the goth club scene. You can really get your swirly on and let loose and nobody cares. It’s awesome. I’m fortunate to be married to a man who loves to dance, both club dancing and ballroom/latin (which I’m going to learn how to do so I can do it with him). Men who dance are sexy! ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/52 "2010-11-21T22:03:18Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Good gravy, **apple** , and all this time I thought I was just glad to find someone who really enjoyed something I found to be fun. Considering that a lot of men don’t like dancing, when you find one who does, you feel like a lucky duck. If you really want to get into whatever base motivations women might have for seeking good dancers, sure, rhythm and confidence are key. I don’t know what all this Disney shit is about, though. I came across badly in those two posts, thinking it might be a little funny, though any humor fell flat. Let me try to be a little clearer, and without any failed attempts at humor. I meant to note that women place a lot of significance and importance on dancing, partly because our culture labels dancing as a potentially romantic activity. Some women buy into that more than others, and so dancing can be a great way to introduce yourself to a woman who you’d otherwise have trouble approaching. Because so many men won’t dance, being able to dance makes a guy stand out, and a guy can use this to his advantage. It can work both ways; I’m still dating the girl who taught me to dance. My apologies if the humor didn’t work; I was a little flip and on rereading, it’s not funny. ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/53 "2010-11-21T22:58:17Z")
> [@appleciders](#): > > so dancing can be a great way to introduce yourself to a woman who you’d otherwise have trouble approaching. Really? Cuz I find it the opposite. If she’s dancing, I’m going to wait til she takes a break to talk to her. I can’t bring myself to just start dancing with her uninvited, because it’s 1) weird and 2) obvious. It’s obvious that I’m only doing this to try to sleep with her and it’s weird because I’m (nearly) touching her without an invitation to do so. That’ll normally get you arrested. > [@appleciders](#): > > Because so many men won’t dance, being able to dance makes a guy stand out, and a guy can use this to his advantage. It can work both ways; I’m still dating the girl who taught me to dance. It’s the human equivalent of the turkey strut or peacock feathers. It’s a look-at-me thing. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/54 "2010-11-21T23:20:13Z")
> [@appleciders](#): > > I came across badly in those two posts, thinking it might be a little funny, though any humor fell flat. I thought you were so funny I did the Watusi. ---
**Author:** ![Otara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a88e4f/32.png) [@Otara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otara)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/55 "2010-11-21T23:25:35Z")
I went to dance school full-time, did contemporary and ballet, straight male. My wife initially cut me dead when she first met me because she assumed I was gay, I have been known to tease her about it occasionally. Fortunately all that dance training made me fairly pretty too, so she hung around long enough to find out otherwise. Overall Id say its not your dance ability, its your willingness to have fun that really matters, and being entertaining at nightclub style dancing generally matters a lot more than formal dancing training or ‘ability’ as such. Otara ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/56 "2010-11-21T23:49:12Z")
I enjoyed ballroom dancing back when I knew how to do it. I wasn’t very good at it, alas. Physical coordination is not one of my skills. Disco type dancing I dislike: I’m not much cop at being spontaneous or looking as if I’m being spontaneous. And I can’t stand the noise, let alone the music. Male, hetero (TTBOMK) ---
**Author:** ![Buckler\_of\_Swashing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Buckler\_of\_Swashing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buckler_of_Swashing)\ **Post date:** [November 21, 2010, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/57 "2010-11-21T23:58:28Z")
Straight, female. I like to dance, theoretically. I am a terrible dancer though and never do it except in total solitude; I wouldn’t dance with a man (in any context, friendly or sexual) if we weren’t totally alone, to avoid embarrassment :). ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2010, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/58 "2010-11-22T01:53:24Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > Really? Cuz I find it the opposite. If she’s dancing, I’m going to wait til she takes a break to talk to her. I can’t bring myself to just start dancing with her uninvited, because it’s 1) weird and 2) obvious. It’s obvious that I’m only doing this to try to sleep with her and it’s weird because I’m (nearly) touching her without an invitation to do so. That’ll normally get you arrested. Sure, in a club atmosphere. I’m talking about ballroom, though, where you typically verbally ask someone to dance and pairs are more or less required, as opposed to a club atmosphere where you can dance solo, in pairs, or in groups. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2010, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/59 "2010-11-22T05:51:13Z")
Gay man, love to dance. Back in the '30s, my father was a champion jitterbug dancer. They used to have contests every week, and the girls would fight over who’d be his partner, because they knew they’d win. I never saw him dance; in fact I never knew about this until after he died. Oh, and my father may or may not have been straight. ---
**Author:** ![Invisible\_Chimp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f05b48/32.png) [@Invisible\_Chimp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Invisible_Chimp)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2010, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394/60 "2010-11-22T06:12:21Z")
Straight white male. I like to dance, but not in public. I have no coordination or rhythm. I took one ballroom dancing class a long time ago. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-much-you-like-to-dance-correlation-with-gender-and-sexual-orientation/561394.md?page=4)