# How Often Do Gay And Lesbian Couples Have Sex?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-do-gay-and-lesbian-couples-have-sex/170325>\
**Category:** Factual Questions\
**Created:** [April 22, 2003, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-do-gay-and-lesbian-couples-have-sex/170325 "2003-04-22T14:58:25Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 4\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Surreal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@Surreal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surreal)\
**Post date:** [April 22, 2003, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-do-gay-and-lesbian-couples-have-sex/170325/1 "2003-04-22T14:58:25Z")

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I’ve heard of studies that have shown that the average heterosexual couple in America has intercourse only about two or three times a week. Have there been any studies to determine the average frequency of sex for gay and lesbian couples?

I would think that the frequency of sex for a gay male couple would give an indication of how often men would like to have sex when they’re in a relationship, that the frequency of lesbian sex would indicate how often women prefer to have sex, and the frequency of sex in heterosexual couples would indicate some type of a compromise struck between the two.

Does anyone know the numbers?

Thanks.

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**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\
**Post date:** [April 22, 2003, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-do-gay-and-lesbian-couples-have-sex/170325/2 "2003-04-22T16:13:17Z")

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I would tend to think that there would be such a broad spectrum that any generalisations about “how often men like sex” would be impossible. Some people (hetero or homosexual) prefer or want sex only a couple of times a week, or maybe even less, while others prefer/want sex several times a day. There might be some sort of bell curve representing an average, but I don’t think any difference in men/women would be significant.

That said, I don’t actually have evidence to back that up, other than anecdotal, but I do seem to recall statistics such as in _McLeans_ magazine about the frequency of sexual intercourse in married couples in different provinces, and the numbers didn’t vary all that much, and there were some doubts about how truthful some people were being when reporting the frequencies of sexual activity. I think your margin of error might be pretty large.

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**Author:** ![Surreal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@Surreal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surreal)\
**Post date:** [April 22, 2003, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-do-gay-and-lesbian-couples-have-sex/170325/3 "2003-04-22T17:48:14Z")

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I agree that the margin of error could be very large. But I did find one study-

[http://pr.concordia.ca/ctr/archives/is081098/art17.html](http://pr.concordia.ca/ctr/archives/is081098/art17.html)

"\*Using a 1989 study conducted by sociologists Pepper Schwartz and Philip Blumstein on 2,000 heterosexuals and 900 homosexual couples, Shaver demonstrated that sex is not a biologically predetermined function, since sexual behaviour seems to vary according to the type of intimate relationship.

In the study, 67 per cent of gay couples in a one-year-or-less relationship reported having sex at least three times a week, compared to 45 per cent of married couples and 33 per cent of lesbian couples.\*"

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**Author:** ![Iteki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/eada6e/32.png) [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)\
**Post date:** [April 22, 2003, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-do-gay-and-lesbian-couples-have-sex/170325/4 "2003-04-22T18:32:32Z")

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Presumably the married couples weren’t in a “one year or less” relationship? What are they comparing then?