# How often does male rape occur OUTSIDE of prison? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 22, 2008, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377 "2008-12-22T22:24:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DudleyGarrett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d9b06d/32.png) [@DudleyGarrett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DudleyGarrett)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2008, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/1 "2008-12-22T22:24:24Z")
Sure, we hear all the stories about men raping men in prison, but we never hear of it during regular everyday life. Does it happen? Related, do women really rape men? ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2008, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/2 "2008-12-22T22:36:47Z")
Sure, my girlfriend rapes me almost every morning. (not really, I mean I’m not exactly fighting her off, but the thing is she gets up earlier than I do to go to work, and for some reason gets really horny in the morning, when I just want to sleep more than anything. It’s still sex, so I allow it) ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Gay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3ab097/32.png) [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2008, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/3 "2008-12-22T22:40:37Z")
I would speculate that the number of male rapes is highly underreported…way more so than underreported female rape. Not sure on that but that’s my hunch-so I’m guessing the real number of victims is totally unknown. ---
**Author:** ![Lavender\_Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b782af/32.png) [@Lavender\_Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lavender_Falcon)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2008, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/4 "2008-12-22T23:01:57Z")
Yes, it happens. There was a high profile case in Texas a couple of years ago of a man who raped several men: > **[Client Challenge](https://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=%2Fn%2Fa%2F2008%2F01%2F14%2Fnational%2Fa170349S49.DTL)** From the same article: > [@](#): > > The U.S. Justice Department says one in 33 men in the United States has been a victim of a rape or attempted rape, compared with one in six women. Experts say men are far less likely to report a rape because they fear being perceived as weak. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2008, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/5 "2008-12-22T23:16:29Z")
> [@DudleyGarrett](#): > > Related, do women really rape men? Yes, but it’s rare. And before you ask, yes you can force an erection out of a man; strangulation will do it. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2008, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/6 "2008-12-23T03:25:14Z")
If by “man” you mean a full grown men I’d say it is extremely rare. I can imagine one man inclined to rape men might give another man a roofie or similar and take advantage of him while he’s out cold, but Pulp Fiction style forcible, non-consensual rape outside of prison would be pretty rare. ---
**Author:** ![shy\_guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a6a055/32.png) [@shy\_guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shy_guy)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2008, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/7 "2008-12-23T04:54:20Z")
> [@DudleyGarrett](#): > > Sure, we hear all the stories about men raping men in prison, but we never hear of it during regular everyday life. As a gay man, I have heard of many instances. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2008, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/8 "2008-12-23T07:42:01Z")
It’s not unheard of for gay men (or men perceived to be gay) to be attacked and raped, usually by two or more drunken teenagers wielding baseball bats or beer bottles. ---
**Author:** ![put\_down\_the\_sabre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/da6949/32.png) [@put\_down\_the\_sabre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/put_down_the_sabre)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2008, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/9 "2008-12-24T02:30:04Z")
> [@astro](#): > > If by “man” you mean a full grown men I’d say it is extremely rare. I can imagine one man inclined to rape men might give another man a roofie or similar and take advantage of him while he’s out cold, but Pulp Fiction style forcible, non-consensual rape outside of prison would be pretty rare. This is such a long way to say, “I have no idea”, isn’t it? Very inefficient. pdts ---
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2008, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/10 "2008-12-24T02:57:15Z")
Depends on what you mean by “rape.” Say there’s a guy. His name’s, uh, **rack babbit**. He gets a migraine one afternoon, so he leaves work, and goes straight to bed. His girlfriend spends the day drinking, and decides she’d like some male companionship. Our guy **rack babbit** is awakened from his uneasy slumber by his girlfriend giving him head. Though he’s a healthy young man, the prospect of sex while in the throes of a migraine (where even the slightest motion causes shooting pains in the head) is singularly unappealing. Especially with a drunk person. So he says, “No thanks, honey. I really need to sleep this off.” “But I’m so horrrny,” she says. “I’m sorry, but I really can’t do it. I mean it. Stop.” “Shut the fuck up and get me off,” she says, and begins to ride him cowgirl. “Seriously, I’m feeling like shit. Stop it. Please?” Despite his pleas, she refuses to stop. He’s somewhat paralyzed by his weakened state (which kinda precludes yelling) and the weirdness of the whole situation, and he’s been raised to never raise a fist at anybody, let alone a woman. So he just lies there. He has an erection, but whatever he’s feeling down there is secondary to the throbbing agony in his head and his paralyzing disgust at what’s happening to him. So, his girlfriend bounces away until she comes, eventually, and she gets up and goes away. He just lies in bed, shaking and feeling sicker than he had fifteen minutes before. I’m still trying to figure out whether **rack babbit** was raped or not. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2008, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/11 "2008-12-24T03:30:37Z")
> [@put\_down\_the\_sabre](#): > > This is such a long way to say, “I have no idea”, isn’t it? Very inefficient. > > pdts If that’s was I was saying then yes, but that’s not what I said. My stated opinion was that it was “extremely rare”. Reading comprehension issues = double plus inefficiency. ---
**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2008, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/12 "2008-12-24T04:25:58Z")
> [@black\_rabbit](#): > > I’m still trying to figure out whether **rack babbit** was raped or not. I vote yes. And I hope he got rid of such an inconsiderate girlfriend. I’m surprised he didn’t puke all over her (I’m often nauseous during a migraine). ---
**Author:** ![nevermore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a587f6/32.png) [@nevermore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nevermore)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2008, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/13 "2008-12-24T05:02:14Z")
well, **rack babbit** , switch the genders and ask yourself the same question. :dubious: just because she didn’t take it by physical force doesn’t mean it wasn’t taken against your will. sorry it happened. hope you at least had a very long talk about it. ---
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2008, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/14 "2008-12-24T13:13:23Z")
> [@NinetyWt](#): > > I vote yes. And I hope he got rid of such an inconsiderate girlfriend. I’m surprised he didn’t puke all over her (I’m often nauseous during a migraine). > [@nevermore](#): > > hope you at least had a very long talk about it. **rack babbit** was a pretty insecure dude. Though they talked about it, somehow the end result of the discussion was that it was his fault for being insufficiently enthusiastic about the incident. Needless to say, the relationship lasted a few more years, until **rack babbit** came to his senses and finally cut her loose. Only after marrying her, though. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![SSG\_Schwartz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SSG\_Schwartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSG_Schwartz)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2008, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/15 "2008-12-26T02:47:15Z")
[This](http://www.q-notes.com/2008/05/31/male-rape-victim-shares-his-story/) article describes one victims experience. From the article: > [@](#): > > The U.S. Justice Department says one in every 10 rape victims is male. According to a national study, about three percent of American men (2.78 million) have been the victim of an attempted or completed rape. Around 60 percent of these men identify as gay or bisexual. I studied under Dr Helen Eigenburg, who was writing her dissertation at the time. Her original topic was to be male rape in the community, but the board would not allow her to do it. She had to compromise and instead write about male rape in prison. Granted this took place in 1989, but I would not be surprised if even the academia still shy away from the topic. SSG Schwartz ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Cymbeline](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_cymbeline/32/9244_2.png) [@Green\_Cymbeline](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Cymbeline)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2008, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/16 "2008-12-26T06:49:16Z")
> [@black\_rabbit](#): > > Despite his pleas, she refuses to stop. He’s somewhat paralyzed by his weakened state (which kinda precludes yelling) and the weirdness of the whole situation, and he’s been raised to never raise a fist at anybody, let alone a woman. > > So he just lies there. I think what happened to you was awful, and maybe rape. But my question is, could you have physically lifted her off you, or rolled over and gotten away? Or was she forcing you down, or was she somehow overpowering you? Or was your headache so bad that you were physically helpless to defend yourself? If it were me, I would physically try to get away with all my might. If he held me down or otherwise prevented me from getting up, then yes, it would definitely be rape. Your situation seems like a gray area. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2008, 9:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/17 "2008-12-26T09:00:23Z")
What’s grey about it? The conclusion in these threads is that rape is sex without someone’s consent, not sex that you didn’t want and couldn’t physically stop. He said no repeatedly and the woman didn’t stop, how is that not rape? ---
**Author:** ![Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/6bbea6/32.png) [@Laughing\_Lagomorph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laughing_Lagomorph)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2008, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/18 "2008-12-26T14:02:14Z")
> [@nyctea scandiaca](#): > > … Or was your headache so bad that you were physically helpless to defend yourself? > > … You’ve never had a migraine, have you? ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2008, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/19 "2008-12-26T14:45:35Z")
> [@nyctea scandiaca](#): > > I think what happened to you was awful, and maybe rape. But my question is, could you have physically lifted her off you, or rolled over and gotten away? Or was she forcing you down, or was she somehow overpowering you? Or was your headache so bad that you were physically helpless to defend yourself? > > If it were me, I would physically try to get away with all my might. If he held me down or otherwise prevented me from getting up, then yes, it would definitely be rape. Your situation seems like a gray area. No, it doesn’t. No means no means no means no, doesn’t it? Isn’t that what we teach our daughters? ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2008, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377/20 "2008-12-26T15:32:37Z")
> [@Laughing\_Lagomorph](#): > > You’ve never had a migraine, have you? Even if the migraine wasn’t making it a physical **impossibility** to fight back, it’s still the height of cruelty to do that to someone who’s in such pain. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-often-does-male-rape-occur-outside-of-prison/478377.md?page=2)