# How should I reply to this petty, petty complaint? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 29, 2009, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050 "2009-05-29T17:30:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/101 "2009-06-18T02:40:26Z")
“Well, if I based my management decisions on your management practices, my team would end up with your team’s low productivity scores and everyone would lose. That would be…unfortunate.” ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/102 "2009-06-18T02:54:54Z")
Wait, was the whole idiot thing in response to her e-mail to you? Please, oh please, say that it was! Erm. . . I’m in particular need of proof that good sometimes wins at the mo. . . ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/103 "2009-06-18T03:20:15Z")
> [@puddleglum](#): > > Email her “But if I do things the way you do then my teams numbers will suck too.” I like that. How about this: I find your complaints petty and your managing methods counterproductive. If I ever find out that you ever criticize me again, either to my face or behind my back I shall ask the boss’ boss to fire your hopeless ass and assign your team to me. This will increase my staff size with the promise of increasing their numbers and saving the entire cost of your pay and benefits package because we could use those assets much more productively without your sorry, whining ass. Then you can go demoralize another sales team at another company. Die Bitch! Die!!! ---
**Author:** ![Zeriel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/58956e/32.png) [@Zeriel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeriel)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/104 "2009-06-18T14:31:27Z")
> [@bup](#): > > Create a fake user on Facebook, and befriend her. Make yourself a gorgeous, rich man, and tell her how she is your soul mate. Send her flowers at work. Tell her you have to meet her, and arrange for her to meet you at the train station (airport could work, but train station is traditional). Tell her to wear a yellow carnation so you’ll recognize her. Make the time “your train arrives” lunch time on the last Friday of the month. > > That Friday call in sick. Wear a fake mustache, a seersucker suit, and a straw boater, and meet her at the train station. Speak with an accent. Wine her and dine her. Take her on a gondola ride. Point out the biplane overhead with the trailer that asks her to marry you. Produce a diamond ring. > > Then beat her senseless with a tire iron. This is the best plan that’s ever been proposed in any context ever. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/105 "2009-06-18T14:45:24Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > I assume you’ve forgotten how very, very much I hate this woman. Yes, but _she’s been told that her management blows and she needs you to tell her how to do it_. And presumably you’re going to get to help pass judgement on whether or not she improves! ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/106 "2009-06-18T14:58:00Z")
Tell your boss that she’s already familiar with your methods, at least superficially, and she is disinclined to adopt them. As evidence, show your boss the email, and suggest that he cut to the chase and dump her. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/107 "2009-06-18T17:54:44Z")
Take your coworker out for lunch at the end of any month she does the managing stuff you tell her to. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/108 "2009-06-18T18:04:20Z")
> [@bup](#): > > Take your coworker out for lunch at the end of any month she does the managing stuff you tell her to. Make sure she knows in advance that if she shows this measured improvement, this will be her reward. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/109 "2009-06-18T18:50:04Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Tell your boss that she’s already familiar with your methods, at least superficially, and she is disinclined to adopt them. > > As evidence, show your boss the email, and suggest that he cut to the chase and dump her. Might have worked when he was told. As of now, she’s Skald’s bitch. Drop the attitude, accept a different way of doing things, or start looking for another job. Oh, and let’s start with taking your team out for lunch… (And I don’t want to hear you bitching about ANY aspect of it before, during or after.) ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/110 "2009-06-18T19:52:32Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Might have worked when he was told. > > As of now, she’s Skald’s bitch. It would be … sweet … if things were going to work that way. But the thing is, our immediate boss wants her to keep her job and thinks that she, or rather her amazing boobs, are quite an asset to the company, by which I mean his pants. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/111 "2009-06-18T21:58:28Z")
Aw crap. Is this a case of shape her up but don’t make her unhappy? That would truly suck. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2009, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/112 "2009-06-18T22:02:16Z")
> [@Yllaria](#): > > Aw crap. Is this a case of shape her up but don’t make her unhappy? That would truly suck. No, I have leave to make her unhappy, as our boss’s bonus is contingent on his managers’ performance (just as each manager’s bonus depends on the performance of the people on their teams). But I don’t like her and dont’ want to deal with her and her boundless-but-unfounded confidence. ---
**Author:** ![Ohime\_Rose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e8c25b/32.png) [@Ohime\_Rose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ohime_Rose)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2009, 11:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/113 "2009-06-19T11:38:13Z")
Be really condesending. That should annoy her. Or take parts of her job and be all, “Sorry, I didn’t think you could handle it. Refilling the printer takes _brains_” I hate the type of people who think they’re “all that”. Surprised they don’t overbalance with their fat heads in the way. Oh wait, her boobs must make up for it… ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/114 "2009-06-23T14:23:34Z")
Bump. So how goes the taming of the shrew? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/115 "2009-06-23T15:27:34Z")
> [@Projammer](#): > > Bump. > > So how goes the taming of the shrew? She has taken the instruction “learn from your fellow manager how to better manage your team so that you don’t lose your job” to mean “persuade your fellow manager to do as much of your work as possible through the magic of your boobs.” ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/116 "2009-06-23T15:34:13Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > She has taken the instruction “learn from your fellow manager how to better manage your team so that you don’t lose your job” to mean “persuade your fellow manager to do as much of your work as possible through the magic of your boobs.” Just a minute! Are you saying that this nincompoop manager is in fact … hot?! 🆒 Well that changes everything. You have intelligence, efficiency, hard work, style and good management practice on your side. She has a good body? Right, I’m on her side now. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/117 "2009-06-23T15:41:43Z")
> [@glee](#): > > Just a minute! > Are you saying that this nincompoop manager is in fact … hot?! 🆒 > > Well that changes everything. > > You have intelligence, efficiency, hard work, style and good management practice on your side. > She has a good body? Right, I’m on her side now. 😃 She’s extremely hot. But she’s also a bitch who uses her sex appeal to control people, or at least tries to. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/118 "2009-06-23T15:47:55Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > She has taken the instruction “learn from your fellow manager how to better manage your team so that you don’t lose your job” to mean “persuade your fellow manager to do as much of your work as possible through the magic of your boobs.” From your posting here, I’ll assume she is failing miserably at her attempts to “delegate”. And depending on her level of annoying, you should be deriving a great deal of amusement from her attempts. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/119 "2009-06-23T15:50:55Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > She has taken the instruction “learn from your fellow manager how to better manage your team so that you don’t lose your job” to mean “persuade your fellow manager to do as much of your work as possible through the magic of your boobs.” Is there any way you can convince her you’re gay? Scribbling Sharpie mustaches on family photos is an option here, by the way. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2009, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050/120 "2009-06-23T15:58:13Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > She has taken the instruction “learn from your fellow manager how to better manage your team so that you don’t lose your job” to mean “persuade your fellow manager to do as much of your work as possible through the magic of your boobs.” _ **The Power of Breasts compels you!** _ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-should-i-reply-to-this-petty-petty-complaint/498050.md?page=7)