# How strange is it that I don't watch porn? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 6, 2009, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097 "2009-09-06T21:51:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2009, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/41 "2009-09-07T09:38:04Z")
> [@The\_Bith\_Shuffle](#): > > I don’t really have out-of-the-ordinary fantasies. My idea of great sex is perfectly executed sex in the missionary or reverse-missionary position. Unbelievably pleasurable, but not kinky in any real way. > > I may have below-average sex drive for a guy, but I do masturbate about five times per week and have for a long time. I do so because of the buildup of sexual energy. I enjoy it but wouldn’t do it very often if I didn’t feel psychological pressure to do so. I find that soft-core images that titillated me when I was a kid are completely unsatisfying, but I find anything hardcore or kinky way too gross. Of course, I didn’t realize one was supposed to masturbate while looking at porn until recently, and I find that doing so is too close to cheating on the person I am with. Oh, and the idea that everybody looking at porn is recent is true, because, in the past, getting your hands on risque images was a lot harder. I would think that it would have often times been simpler to either use your imagination or get a wife. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/42 "2009-09-08T15:58:56Z")
> [@DaphneBlack](#): > > Why is it so incredible that one (male or female) could just use one’s imagination for masturbation material? > > ‘The mind’s eye’ is pretty powerful. It’s incredible because of how rare it happens to be. ---
**Author:** ![wierdaaron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/eada6e/32.png) [@wierdaaron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wierdaaron)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/43 "2009-09-08T18:32:09Z")
It is incredible in the same way it is incredible how many people eat other foods when white rice is so plentiful and inexpensive. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/44 "2009-09-08T18:58:04Z")
> [@wierdaaron](#): > > It is incredible in the same way it is incredible how many people eat other foods when white rice is so plentiful and inexpensive. Not much protein. Quite boring. Unpleasant over-full feeling afterwards. ---
**Author:** ![BaconAndEggs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f4b2a3/32.png) [@BaconAndEggs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BaconAndEggs)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/45 "2009-09-08T19:05:35Z")
I don’t watch porn either. I feel like I’m asexual. I like companionship, but I’m squicked out by having sex. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/46 "2009-09-08T20:17:41Z")
I don’t watch porn, and I don’t enjoy it. A few times the spouse (who doesn’t either, much) talked me into watching some, I spent half my time being disgusted and the other half laughing at how ridiculous it was (he was laughing too–it really was pretty silly). Has nothing to do with religious or moral problems–if that’s your thing, great. But watching people have sex does nothing for me, nor do closeups of various parts of male or female anatomy or sexual processes. I don’t mind looking at an attractive nude picture of a person of either sex, but it doesn’t so much arouse me as just makes me think, “Hey, that person has a nice body.” It doesn’t help that in the few bits of porn I’ve seen, the men have been…well…less than attractive. I realize most of it is for the benefit of guys so they have to have women with blonde hair and huge boobs, but sheesh…get some guys who don’t look like Ron Jeremy. Guys in gay porn are more attractive (or at least that’s how it appears from the box covers–I’ve never actually watched any) but I don’t think I’d get much out of watching two guys going at it, either. The closest I’ve ever come to finding anything like porn arousing, it’s usually been things like naturist/nudist pictures where attractive people are performing normal daily activities in the nude. But watching them have sex? No thanks. ---
**Author:** ![PetW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d2c977/32.png) [@PetW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PetW)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2009, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/47 "2009-09-09T00:52:27Z")
I can sort of relate with the OP. I’m 24 and have a pretty high sex drive, but don’t watch porn very often. For me it’s more exciting mentally picturing girls that I actually have a chance of having sex with than with some naked actress in a cheesy porno. Then again, I rarely have long relationships with girls and am mostly still into the “thrill of the catch.” ---
**Author:** ![andiepandie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7ba0ec/32.png) [@andiepandie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andiepandie)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2009, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/48 "2009-09-09T03:17:10Z")
> [@kapri](#): > > This is interesting. I have been married twice, and as far as I know, neither of my husbands watched or looked at porn. If they did, it’s news to me. Are men really that into porn? I didn’t realize it was a widespread thing like it seems to be to the posters here. Sure, I’ve looked at porn when it’s available to me, but I have no interest in seeking in out, and after a minute I think it’s pretty boring. I know men appreciate it more than (most) women do, but still–is it really something most men are interested in, and if so, why? > > I’m not kidding with that last question. Why? I’ve held back from mentioning something similar in these kinds of threads before because I honestly thought that no one would believe me if I did, porn being so ubiquitous these days. However, I’ve been living with my bf for over 13 years now, and I honestly have no reason to believe he looks at porn or even masturbates with any regular frequency (or at all). He has no reason to lie or try to cover it up if he did because we have a very open relationship. I have heard all about his teenage porn use and the lengths he would go to try to get it (e.g. trying to fine-tune the old satelite dish they had at the time in the hopes of seeing a hint of boob through the scrambling, the sheer joy and excitement he felt when he and his best friend found an old collection of Playboys in the neighbour’s trash, etc.) and I masturbate in front of him quite frequently during foreplay and sex (sorry if that’s TMI), so it’s not like either of us have any hangups about it. When I’ve asked him in the past why he doesn’t watch porn, his answer is usually something along the lines of “Why would I do that when I have the real/better thing right next to me?” When it comes to masturbation (no pun intended), perhaps it’s just that his sex drive is low enough that the amount of sex we do have is generally sufficient? Whatever the case, it would seem that compared to the guys around here he is much more of an exception than a rule! ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2009, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/49 "2009-09-09T05:03:43Z")
> [@The\_Bith\_Shuffle](#): > > I don’t really have out-of-the-ordinary fantasies. My idea of great sex is perfectly executed sex in the missionary or reverse-missionary position. Unbelievably pleasurable, but not kinky in any real way. > > I may have below-average sex drive for a guy, but I do masturbate about five times per week and have for a long time. I do so because of the buildup of sexual energy. I enjoy it but wouldn’t do it very often if I didn’t feel psychological pressure to do so. Are you open, out, and comfortable with your sexuality, whatever it happens to be? Do your sexual habits change when in a relationship? > [@AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](#): > > THIS. I’m sorry but most visual porn seems to be targeted towards the Yah Dude demographic. Meaning it’s fake and crude. There’s nothign wrong with movies of lovemaking/sex…but much of porn really seems to have an agrogant (sp?) attitude about it…like it’s very “hetro dude self centered” You’re drawing with an awfully broad brush. Generalizations about “most porn” are as accurate as as they would be about “most comedy” or “most science fiction.” > [@kapri](#): > > This is interesting. I have been married twice, and as far as I know, neither of my husbands watched or looked at porn. If they did, it’s news to me. > [@andiepandie](#): > > …I honestly have no reason to believe he looks at porn or even masturbates with any regular frequency (or at all). > … > > When it comes to masturbation (no pun intended), perhaps it’s just that his sex drive is low enough that the amount of sex we do have is generally sufficient? Honestly, I think they’re just discreet about what they do when they’re alone. It’s not uncommon for women to underestimate the male sex drive. ---
**Author:** ![AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2009, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/50 "2009-09-09T06:24:44Z")
> [@](#): > > and the other half laughing at how ridiculous it was (he was laughing too–it really was pretty silly). Yes. There’s good porn…and then there’s Yah Dude/ Fratboy demographic porn…Alot of it is pretty silly. Like I was watching mainstream girl on girl porn with my best friend. It was SO FAKE!!! Whereas real lesbian porn while it can be kind of cheesy, can also bereally good and realistic. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2009, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/51 "2009-09-09T07:25:21Z")
I think it is pretty strange just seeing that you are just 20 years old (not necessarily bad but not typical either). As mentioned above, many if not most teenage males will literally do whatever it takes to get their hands on a nudey magazine or at least that is what was required when I was growing up. I can’t imagine what the web has done to young people’s sexuality these days although I know it makes things a whole lot easier to get what you want. Do you like really softcore stuff like swimsuit magazines or Maxim photoshoots? ---
**Author:** ![JR\_Brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d6d6ee/32.png) [@JR\_Brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JR_Brown)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2009, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/52 "2009-09-09T22:30:28Z")
> [@ITR\_champion](#): > > For women, despite various claims by defenders, very few women use pornography. Depends on how you define porn. If “something that contains explicit depictions of sexual activity and is consumed for purposes including sexual arousal” is porn, then most women do in fact consume porn. It’s just [more discreetly packaged](http://rwanational.org/cs/the_romance_genre/romance_literature_statistics) than the guy-stuff. ---
**Author:** ![SSgtBaloo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@SSgtBaloo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSgtBaloo)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2009, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/53 "2009-09-09T23:04:25Z")
In my own experience, it was the mystery of what exactly it was they didn’t want me to see under all those clothes that drove my initial forays into pornography. Heck, the “how babies happen” book my parents left for me to find in the dining room when my sister got pregnant only had silhouettes of what they were describing, and not very clear ones at that. Imagine being shown a map of the United States and being told that Rhode Island was on the Eastern coast. That’s how vague the information was. I was pretty sure I knew that what girls had was “different”, but I only knew it was somewhere “down there”. I was eighteen before I finally had a good idea what female genitalia looked like. Regarding the OP, it depends on what you call pornography. When I was a small child, National Geographic would show Naked Savages™, but the ads for lixury liner cruises and resorts invariably had photographs of young women wearing bikinis, but (seemingly) without navels. Back then navels were considered “smut” (the term “pornography” had not entered wide use and would probably have seemed vulger back then). More recently, Janet Jackson’s “wardrobe malfunction” created quite the furore in conservative circles. (I’m still pissed that I forgot to record that particular superbowl, drat the luck!) So… What do you think Pornography is? Pictures of naked wimmen’? Graphic depictions of “sexual congress” (a term which still makes me laugh)? I expect that if you don’t need pictures, you already have an adequate idea what the desired sex looks like to fantasize about it. That constitutes “close enough” to normal that I wouldn’t fret much. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2009, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097/54 "2009-09-09T23:30:26Z")
Just to make the OP feel a bit less “weird” (or maybe not if you knew me 🙂 ). Porn does almost nothing for me. I’ve had the occasional accidental internet encounter with porn. The movies and tv shows that could be considered soft porn. And the every now and then the "hey dude, this is so strange/funny/whatever you gotta see it ! ". Now, when I was a kid, I certainly had the curiosity to want to see photos of NEKED women. When I was a bit older I was dieing for any kind of lovin (without much luck). Finally started getting some regular sex before I became the 40 YO virgin (cute movie BTW). And I likes me some regular sex. And I still see the occasional woman (or even certain cartoon woman) and think “yeah, that could be nice”. So, I am not asexual. I am not gay. I am not a confirmed virgin. I am not a pedophile. I have no mental or religious hangups with folks (myself or others) getting it on. I am not a fury or whatever. I am also not a sexual tasmanian devil ( the cartoon sort) either. And porn, or strip clubs for that matter, hold almost no interest for me. And pretty much never have. If I need to “blow a load” on demand for some reason, it would probably help, but as for it being some sort of casual entertainment for me? NOPE. So, the OP may be a bit outa the “norm”, but he aint THAT out there IME. And I have a fair number of reasonably normal friends that I think could also be described in that fashion as well. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-strange-is-it-that-i-dont-watch-porn/509097.md?page=2)