# How to approach someone you have a crush on

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-approach-someone-you-have-a-crush-on/783601>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [April 2, 2017, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-approach-someone-you-have-a-crush-on/783601 "2017-04-02T19:05:52Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 5

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**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\
**Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-approach-someone-you-have-a-crush-on/783601/81 "2017-04-17T14:20:35Z")

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> [@Mijin](#):
>
> **@Penfeather**  
> Step 1 of my “dating advice to shy guys” schtick is: talk to more people. More people in general, and including attractive women. Eventually it will not be a big deal to talk to an attractive woman, and also you’ll find you become interested in women at a more appropriate time – around the time you’re sensing they are interested in you.

Best advice in this thread. Learn by doing. Even if it doesn’t lead to immediate dates with attractive women, you will improve your conversational skills, and you might make some new friends.

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**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\
**Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-approach-someone-you-have-a-crush-on/783601/82 "2017-05-15T16:54:43Z")

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Update?

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**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\
**Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-approach-someone-you-have-a-crush-on/783601/83 "2017-05-15T20:37:36Z")

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> [@Grrr](#):
>
> I once had a crush on a Wendy’s manager I used to frequent. And I’m fairly certain she liked me back.
> 
> But I never managed to ask her out. Because, ya’ know, you don’t ask the service person out while they are at work.
> 
> I fucking regret I didn’t make an exception just that once.
> 
> Typically speaking, I still think it’s a bad idea to ask the service person out. Unless you have damn good reason to believe they like you back. (And them smiling and being nice to you does not constitute such a reason.)

I dated a waitress for a bit, asked her out at work. It was fine.

I’ve been in the service industry myself and there were many customers I’d have loved to get to know better. And a couple I had no interest in who were very interested in me, even a couple who kind of stalked me (that was creepy).

Except for the stalkers it never bothered me to be complimented and/or asked out by anyone at work as long as they were okay about my rejection. It was no different to me than someone asking me outside of work.

Me being a male (and in my opinion nothing special in the looks department) I didn’t get that very often so if I was an attractive female being hit on constantly that might have been a different story. But I’m sure those women also deal with it outside of work. And it’s probably less of a bother being approached by strange men in a public place surrounded by people than alone where you don’t know if your rejection will be received very poorly.

I say don’t worry about doing it at the store. It’s not that big of a deal.

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