# How to Date a White Woman: A Practical Guide for Asian Men **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 27, 2006, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275 "2006-07-27T15:58:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![audiobottle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc8723/32.png) [@audiobottle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/audiobottle)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/41 "2006-07-28T13:48:19Z")
The idea that Asian men (or at least, Korean men) think they’re God’s gift to… well, everyone… that is partially true. In Korea, at least, boys are babied quite a bit. The idea that a male would learn to cook, clean, etc is becoming more accepted, but if you watch a Korean drama or talk to a homegrown Korean man, you’ll get a feel for the idea that women are mainly support structures to the men. I’d say it’s probably pretty similar to America 50 years ago. That’s one reason a lot of Korean girls like Western men, or at least Westernized men. There’s the idea that Western(ized) men are more sensitive, more caring, more romantic… in short, all that a girl probably would want in a man. As a Korean man who has dated both white and Asian, I can’t really say that I’ve ever felt like white women would never even think to date me, but hey, if they won’t date me because I’m Asian, I can’t really say I’d want to date them either. > [@](#): > > But I don’t think that **Whitey’s Guide to Rice Chasing** is the inverse of this book at all… Bolding mine. This is the best book title I have ever seen. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/42 "2006-07-28T14:55:13Z")
[QUOTE=r4nd0mNumb3rs] I’m not completely sure where that generalization comes from but believe me, many asians men are painfully aware that **Tabby Cat** ’s view towards asian men is not an unusual one. I truly doubt that many of think that we’re a gift from god in any sense, but probably more hampered by the idea that women of other races are not attracted to us (which **Tabby Cat** proves is sometimes the case). [/QUOTE] I have accounts on a few singles dating websites. One of them asks members to specify all the races from which they’d be _willing_ to date people. I’ve noticed that about 100% of the female members state that they’d be willing to date Caucasians – in fact, I don’t think I’ve seen a single profile that didn’t specify this. In contrast, a considerably smaller number (about 65%) said that they would even consider dating an Asian man. (Moreover, I suspect that this figure is overly generous, since most people would not want to be perceived as being racist or having any racial bias.) Another singles site asks people to list their _ideal_ matches in dating. Nearly 100% of the women listed “Caucasian” among their racial preferences, and many others included blacks and Latinos as well. Only about 10% or less specified “Asian” among their preferences. Make of that what you wish. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/43 "2006-07-28T15:33:40Z")
While I can’t / won’t speak to \*\*Tabby’s \*\* opinion on the aesthetics of Asian men (by the way, I think she was referring to \*east \* Asians, yes?), I don’t think her comparisons to their features as compared to western males is that off base. As far as the testosterone issue, I have no idea, but it sounds somewhat plausible. Are you really going to pretend that there is no difference in their physical features? Is it now evil to notice (and god forbid acknowledge out loud) that there are certain physcial characteristics specific to different ethnicities? ---
**Author:** ![Auntbeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Auntbeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Auntbeast)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/44 "2006-07-28T15:47:27Z")
I think throwing Chow Yun Fat into the mix makes any mix more interesting. Then again, he isn’t typical of the Asian folk I see and work with every day. We have some smoking hot asian guys that come in and work where I do. I mean really, heart weakening, dirty thought inducing, swooning hot. I just found out one of the guys is a twin, I said cool, there’s a spare? Can I have one of you? (he knew me enough to laugh) Damn him for wearing the shirt that said “I’m the evil twin.” Be still my heart. I work in an environment where we have what I consider a higher than usual population of asian folk, so I think I see far more than most folks on a daily basis. (I deal poker) I’ve not dated any purely asian men in my life. I would think that is more because of the height issue than any racial preference on my part. I’m 5’8" which makes me an amazon. Short white guys wouldn’t date me. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/45 "2006-07-28T15:51:49Z")
[QUOTE=WOOKINPANUB] Are you really going to pretend that there is no difference in their physical features? [/QUOTE] Has anyone done that? ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/46 "2006-07-28T16:35:42Z")
[QUOTE=Contrapuntal] Has anyone done that? [/QUOTE] Yes, \*\*alice\_-in\_wonderland \*\* kind of did when she said > [@](#): > > ?!?! I, uh, haven’t noticed this. I’m not picking on **alice** , or anyone else for that matter, but to say one has not noticed certain characteristics of a certain nationality? I know we’d all like to think of ourselves as colorblind, but is it really so heinous to \*acknowledge \* our physical differences? \*\*Tabby Cat’s \*\* comments may have come off a little harsh, but there was some truth there and it seems to have brought out a strange defensiveness. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/47 "2006-07-28T16:45:07Z")
“All your white momen are belong to us.” ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/48 "2006-07-28T17:04:04Z")
[QUOTE=WOOKINPANUB] Yes, \*\*alice\_-in\_wonderland \*\* kind of did [/QUOTE] ? Uh, no. Not thinking that asian men look “feminine” does not equal thinking that asian men look exactly the same as caucasian men. They don’t. Same as black men, indian men, and spanish men don’t look like caucasian men. However, they all look like _MEN_. I think it’s absurd that someone could say they think asian men look “girly” and I’m the only person who disagrees. _SOME_ asian men look girly - mind you, PeeWee Herman and Eurkel look pretty girly too. My point is, that I’ve seen LOTS of asian men that look like big, studly, manly men that make we want to rip my clothes off. Furthermore, I’ve met lots of asian men my height or taller (I’m 5’8") - while most asian guys tend to be a bit shorter than that, it strikes me as totally weird that I’m the only person who’s noticed lots of asian fellas taller than that too. Oh well. I guess I’m like the United Nations. I dig everybody. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/49 "2006-07-28T20:03:17Z")
[QUOTE=tomndebb] I suspect that the stereotype of the Asian guy pining/lusting after white women is bigger in the minds of white folks than Asians, anyway.) [/QUOTE] Yeah, really! Why would you want white chicks with all the Asian chicks around anyway? 🙂 Just kidding… (not really partial to Asian women anyway!) ---
**Author:** ![Cerowyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/82dd89/32.png) [@Cerowyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerowyn)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/50 "2006-07-28T20:23:40Z")
[QUOTE=Velma] I prefer “How to Pick Up Japanese Chicks and Doom Your Immortal Soul”. [/QUOTE] **NOW** you tell me. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Throatwarbler\_Mangrove](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8c91f0/32.png) [@Throatwarbler\_Mangrove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Throatwarbler_Mangrove)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/51 "2006-07-28T23:03:49Z")
[QUOTE=alice\_in\_wonderland] Oh well. I guess I’m like the United Nations. I dig everybody. [/QUOTE] _Checks resume_ …How YOU doin’? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Harvey\_The\_Heavy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Harvey\_The\_Heavy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harvey_The_Heavy)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2006, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/52 "2006-07-29T00:41:36Z")
[QUOTE=Velma] I prefer “How to Pick Up Japanese Chicks and Doom Your Immortal Soul”. [/QUOTE] Hey, my immortal soul is already doomed, that’s half the battle! ---
**Author:** ![Grey\_area](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Grey\_area](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grey_area)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2006, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/53 "2006-07-29T03:41:16Z")
[QUOTE=Sublight] This kind of reminds me of an incident with one of my students back when I was teaching in semi-rural Japan. The topic of conversation turned toward dating and marriage, and a couple of students (40-50ish, working at home or as teachers) mentioned that they wanted their daughters to marry westerners (personally, I think at least a couple were projecting). When I asked about their sons, every one of them wanted their sons to marry Japanese women. [/QUOTE] I should’ve been more specific. Asian-_American_ parents are more accepting of their son marrying outside the race, since they have to realize the majority of available women are not asian. Though they would still prefer an asian probably. A bit different from a Japanese man in Japan. > [@audiobottle](#): > > The idea that Asian men (or at least, Korean men) think they’re God’s gift to… well, everyone… that is partially true. In Korea, at least, boys are babied quite a bit. The idea that a male would learn to cook, clean, etc is becoming more accepted, but if you watch a Korean drama or talk to a homegrown Korean man, you’ll get a feel for the idea that women are mainly support structures to the men. I’d say it’s probably pretty similar to America 50 years ago. That’s one reason a lot of Korean girls like Western men, or at least Westernized men. There’s the idea that Western(ized) men are more sensitive, more caring, more romantic… in short, all that a girl probably would want in a man. As a fellow Korean male, I admit we might be babied more than American men, but I doubt that plays into our love lives so much. I mean I’m not sitting here telling my SO to make me a sandwich and wash my feet while I post. I think the sort of sexism found in Asian culture makes asian men more chivalrous than western, or westernized men. Having spent a significant time in western cultures and in Korea, I’ve distinctly noticed Korean men (while dating at least) are _more_ sensitive, caring, and romantic. I mean they do things for their girlfriends that are sooo cheesy and romantic it makes me sick. Like how many American men would be caught dead wearing a “couple t-shirt” (wearing matching outfits with your SO)? A rather common occurence in Korea. Wanna go dutch? Good luck getting a second date. So I’m not sure how much contact you’ve had with unwesternized asian men but you’re making them out to be complete monsters. My personal experiences show that even though some of their attitude is slightly more sexist, that comes with a lot of chivalry as well. ---
**Author:** ![audiobottle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc8723/32.png) [@audiobottle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/audiobottle)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2006, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/54 "2006-07-29T03:49:51Z")
Sorry, I don’t mean to make straight up Korean men seem like total dicks or anything. I spent a lot of time in Korea growing up, as well as almost all my family living in Korea. You are right about the chivalry thing - I mean, girls will actually ask their boyfriend’s advice on purses because he’ll be the one carrying it all the time. I think there’s a difference though in attitude. In Korea, the man/woman relationship is much less of an equals thing than it is in America (or at least the more metropolitan areas). In Korea I get the feeling that it’s more of an almost mother/child relationship. Having talked to Korean women from Korea, I know it’s not just me. It doesn’t help either that kids are expected to live at home at least until marriage, if not beyond. Men are to be supported. Women are not to lead, at least not in any significant way. I think this is exactly why Korean men seem more chivalrous. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2006, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/55 "2006-07-30T23:08:15Z")
[QUOTE=r4nd0mNumb3rs] The sad truth is asian women marry outside the race 246% (2000 US Census) more than asian men. Maybe a part of that is pressure from the family to marry one of our own, but my personal obversations lead me to believe that though most asian parents would prefer their son marry an asian, they have little problem with them marrying a woman of a different race. It’s just a lack of options that causes that disparity. [/QUOTE] I’d say that your evaluation is 100% accurate. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2006, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/56 "2006-07-31T03:39:12Z")
[QUOTE=r4nd0mNumb3rs] I should’ve been more specific. Asian-_American_ parents are more accepting of their son marrying outside the race, since they have to realize the majority of available women are not asian. Though they would still prefer an asian probably. A bit different from a Japanese man in Japan. [/QUOTE] Oh yeah, they’re no doubt pretty different, I was just amused by how my students’ marriage goals for their sons and daughters were exactly opposite each other. ---
**Author:** ![medstar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f07891/32.png) [@medstar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/medstar)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2006, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275/57 "2006-08-01T00:23:06Z")
So, does this mean all of you asian males will be redoubling your efforts to get yourselves white women and all of the privileges this entails?🙂 ::d&r:: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-date-a-white-woman-a-practical-guide-for-asian-men/366275.md?page=2)