I’ve read many pages of this thread, and I feel there’s something critical missing.
I am a Christian and a conservative (please note, I do not say “Republican”). I would say that true Christians, that is to say, people who identify with and believe the “basic” concepts of Christianity, are not, and cannot be hate-filled bigots. People who call themselves Christians who are genuinely filled with hate or bigotry have failed to understand what the Bible tells us about who God is.
Just because a Christian doesn’t agree with a point of view does not necessarily mean that they are hate-filled bigots. Before you can make that presumption you have to determine their motive, their behaviors, and their attitudes.
For example, I was raised by a Father who was prejudice. He had a general dislike of black people and taught me the same. As I grew up and made my own judgments about the world around me, I came to the conclusion that he was wrong in his attitude and my wife and I have determined not to pass that bigotry along to our young children. My son doesn’t even think “white people” or “black people”. He thinks “people”, and when describing a black person, he says “you know, the kid with brown skin”. He makes no distinction between white and black people, a fact that makes me very proud.
Lately, our challenge is how to teach him Christian appropriate values about homosexuality without devaluing the people involved? I want him to understand that although we can’t condone the behavior, it’s just as wrong to dehumanize a person, or discriminate for any reason. We have to teach him to make sound judgments about people based on their individual character. Just because someone is black or homosexual has nothing to do with the quality of character of that person.
I think there are some important concepts to keep in mind while discussing such difficult issues as homosexuality and gay marriage.
I’ll not skirt the statement and say it straight: As Christians, we believe homosexuality is immoral. This is a religious conviction for us, the same as Jews are convicted that Jesus was not the savior, or those of the Islamic faith believe in Allah. What I do not believe is that homosexuals are “less”, I do not believe that they have nothing to contribute to society, or even my life. I have had homosexual friends, had meals with them, and engaged in their lives. I was every bit as heartbroken when a gay friend of mine passed as I have been when I lost straight friends. I went to his funeral, hugged his partner and tried to console him. This is being human, and treating people the way I would want to be treated in a similar circumstance. If I am to ostracize a gay person for what I view as their sin, then what would become of me due to sin in my own life? I strive to treat ALL people with love and compassion, not just people I agree with 100%. I’m sad to say that I sometimes fall short of this mark, and see the confusion in my son’s eyes when I do.
Now, I’m not a “pray the gay away” type Christian (I hate that phrase, by the way). I believe that it can help some, and sometimes it doesn’t help others. I don’t claim to know what the answer is and frankly I am concerned any time I hear a Christian claim to. Over the years, I’ve changed my views and now I do believe that some homosexuals are born that way (I have no cites, but I’ve read that there’s been some research breakthroughs in this regard).
I’ve also changed my views about civil unions. I used to feel they were wrong, but…our governmental system must govern all people, and not discriminate either. It must protect and serve ALL Americans. I find myself now un-opposed to the concept of a Civil Union and the legal provisions that are often set aside for married couples.
Until and unless something comes up that changes my mind, I believe, based on my Christian belief framework, that marriage is between a man and a woman and I will support keeping it that way. Now note that I distinguish between the concepts of marriage and Civil Unions, and not the legal provisions. I believe that every American, regardless of faith, gender, race, or sexual disposition, should be permitted to pursue happiness so long as that pursuit doesn’t infringe on everyone else’s rights. To me, ‘marriage’ is a religious institution as defined by Christian tenants, recognition of which has been legally observed. With that understanding, a homosexual couple cannot enter into it, but I can’t see why they shouldn’t be granted legal validation.
Our country was founded on freedom, I will support your right to pursue what you feel you need to be happy, and hopefully we can find some ground where we are all happy and feel truly validated, but respect my right to disagree with you without resorting to trying to label me as a hateful bigot.