# How to grocery shop (Since there seems to be some confusion): A rant **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 3, 2012, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663 "2012-04-03T03:02:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Jamicat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c67d28/32.png) [@Jamicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jamicat)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2012, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/181 "2012-04-06T01:43:24Z")
Why can’t people wait 5 seconds for me to pocket my change, place bills in wallet grab my bags and get the fuck out the way before they start shoving their shit up on the counter and nudging me aside? :mad: I got two hands…one with a wallet, one with a receipt, change and cash, none are available to grab the bag off the counter, until one of those hands are clear. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![expectopatronum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/expectopatronum/32/173_2.png) [@expectopatronum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/expectopatronum)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2012, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/182 "2012-04-06T01:57:18Z")
> [@Waenara](#): > > So I stopped at a grocery store that is normally open until 11pm, but was closing at 5pm due to the holiday. I pulled into the parking lot at 4:49, so I figured it would be fine. I get to the door at 4:50 and there’s an employee basically blockading the door with stacks of shopping baskets - they didn’t just lock the door and put up a sign, he’s actually stacked a million baskets in front of the door and standing there telling me they’re closed. I explained that I understood they want to close on time in ten minutes, but I swear that I only need to get whipping cream and it will take me a maximum of two minutes. He gives me the hairy eyeball and looks dubious, and I promise I’m not lying and I won’t try to buy a bunch of stuff or take too long. So he let me in, I grabbed some whipping cream and went to the express checkout (which had no one in line), and I was back in my car and pulling out of the lot at 4:57. in my experience, on big shopping days like thanksgiving, christmas, etc, you have to do that for the customers to understand that you’re closing. you can make all the signs you want, shut off the doors, turn off the lights, and people will keep shopping. you can make closing announcements, and they will keep shopping. they will push open the automatic doors if they’re unlocked and grab a cart. you have to actually have a physical barrier or a person standing guard to make sure no one else comes in. you should’ve been let in without an issue 10 minutes before closing for sure, but i definitely understand why they go to those lengths to close up. ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2012, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/183 "2012-04-06T02:50:45Z")
In June of 1974, just before I joined the Army, I was working in a big grocery. The date, June 8th, was significant because eight years before that, to the day, a huge tornado ate it’s way through our fair city. So I’m working along and the sirens go off. This is not a drill. An announcement is made of the tornado warning. We don’t have shelters, but other stores do, so folks are asked to leave. We clerks are to throw our tills in the safe and bolt across the street to a restaurant that can accomodate us. Shoppers get mad when we won’t check them out before seeking shelter. And when the manager makes a final sweep through the store before leaving he finds a guy wandering around who asks “Where’s the strawberry jam?” ---
**Author:** ![stegon66](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee59a6/32.png) [@stegon66](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stegon66)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2012, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/184 "2012-04-06T12:12:04Z")
> [@](#): > > And chances are the cashier’s manager is going to be pissed at the cashier for having so much change in their drawer (I had several managers that were that way). When you’re responsible for counting all the money at the end of a shift you learn to appreciate those cashiers who leave a minimum of change in their tills. Especially dimes. I hate dimes. ---
**Author:** ![MickNickMaggies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/59ef9b/32.png) [@MickNickMaggies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MickNickMaggies)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2012, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/185 "2012-04-06T12:53:33Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > Self-checkout story - we went to our local Superstore on New Year’s Day to pick up something or other\*, and it was incredibly crowded - like, no one can move in the area with the tills because it was so crowded. We waited in line for half an hour at the self-checkout line. When I went back to that store the next week, they had brand new signs at the self-checkouts, proclaiming that they were for small amount of groceries only (I think it was 25 items, which still seems high for self-checkout to me). > > \*I don’t frigging know what the hell we were doing at the store that day. I learned my lesson, though. My husband was doing this- 25+ items in a 10 or less checkout. I will give him some leeway, as neither of us is a native French speaker and he has a harder time with it than me.What I will not do is continue to let him do that once I have translated it for him (also, the number 10 is in digits- it was a fair freaking guess that it referred to items, wasn’t it? Or am I a bitch?). ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2012, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/186 "2012-04-06T14:23:25Z")
> [@MickNickMaggies](#): > > My husband was doing this- 25+ items in a 10 or less checkout. I will give him some leeway, as neither of us is a native French speaker and he has a harder time with it than me.What I will not do is continue to let him do that once I have translated it for him (also, the number 10 is in digits- it was a fair freaking guess that it referred to items, wasn’t it? Or am I a bitch?). My wife would scream at me if I did that (and she’s generally soft-spoken). I would _hope_ she’d also wrestle the cart out of my hands and push it over to a regular checkout lane, over my unconscious form if need be. You _should_ have been a bitch. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2012, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/187 "2012-04-06T14:37:07Z")
> [@salinqmind](#): > > If you are buying a sandwich or sushi for lunch, can’t you pay right there at the counter where you get it? (well, some stores have a register in their takeout food section, maybe not all). And isn’t that what the express line is for, just a few items? The SAHMs who are doing mega-shopping would be standing in the regular lines with their full carts, out of the way of the hungry lunch buying people. It would be more convenient to pay for takeout food at the counter, but some stores have policies against employees handling both food and money. There may also be issues with pay; people who handle money are classified as one job at one rate of pay, while people who handle food are classified as another at a different rate of pay and changing that would be more trouble than it’s worth for so few people. That said, I agree that supermarkets that offer ready-made food would do well to have one dedicated line just for takeout purchases, at least during the meal rush periods. ---
**Author:** ![california\_jobcase](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@california\_jobcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/california_jobcase)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2012, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/188 "2012-04-06T15:02:41Z")
Walmart and other big stores wait too long to gather their carts from the parking lot. Since the rear wheels have to slide sideways over the pavement when a long train of carts is moved, most of their carts’ rear wheels have serious flat spots on them. This makes the cart the cart annoying to push as it goes whacka whacka whacka down the aisle. I’ve heard some locales have four-wheel caster carts. Anybody know where? ---
**Author:** ![Kevbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e47774/32.png) [@Kevbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kevbo)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/189 "2012-04-08T00:48:08Z")
When I lived in Vienna four castering wheels was the norm. Made it much easier to maneuver in narrower isles. ---
**Author:** ![etv78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/190 "2012-04-08T01:06:23Z")
> [@Living\_Well\_Is\_Best\_Revenge](#): > > Yes, this. I have no idea why nearly every item has to get its own bag. I always tell the bagger to fill up the bag as much as possible, unless it’s eggs or bread. Those can be separate. And if something comes in a bag already. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/191 "2012-04-08T02:09:07Z")
> [@california\_jobcase](#): > > I’ve heard some locales have four-wheel caster carts. Anybody know where? Trader Joe’s, for one. ---
**Author:** ![UntouchedTakeaway](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/d78d45/32.png) [@UntouchedTakeaway](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UntouchedTakeaway)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/192 "2012-04-08T11:53:14Z")
I have a theory on the “change piled on top of the bills” thing. Back in the day when I was in retail (I’m 50 - and get off my lawn!), manually-operated, and even some early electronic cash registers did not give you the change amount. You had to figure it out and the standard for returning the change was to “count it back” to the customer: “Your total is $13.17, Mrs Shlabotnick. A twenty? Thank you. (mental figuring or a calculator if you were truly desperate and they gave you the dreaded penny…lol) Here’s your change - 83 cents makes it $14, and $1 is $15 and $5 makes $20. Thanks for shopping at Krabfelters…have a nice day”. Cumbersome, yes, but the change _always_ landed in the palm first, followed by the paper money. Now with these new-fangled ee-lectronic machines, the necessity to do all of this is gone and it’s just pile the change on top of the dollars. Another thing that bugs me is if I am holding out my hand for the receipt, please don’t put it in my bag. UT ---
**Author:** ![OttoDaFe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ottodafe/32/356_2.png) [@OttoDaFe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OttoDaFe)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/193 "2012-04-08T18:13:44Z")
Based on this morning’s excursion: Make (reasonably) sure you have sufficient funds in your EBT account for the lollipops and Slim Jims you’re getting for your drooling brood.Yes, I know this is a gross mischaracterization of the vast majority who are doing their best to feed their families using their food stamp / EBT benefits. But not only were these people using an EBT card to buy junk food — which torques me enough all by itself — but even after the cashier told them how much short they were, they had to stand there and agonize over what to turn back. My own damn fault, I suppose, for waving them ahead of me. At least I wouldn’t have been among the inconvenionced. ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/194 "2012-04-08T19:21:58Z")
Yeah, I’m a big fan of the self-checkouts. Except when: - They’re being taken up by 90-year-old dodderers who probably still haven’t figured out how to use a VCR, and invariably they’re buying a bunch of produce and have no idea how to enter the PLU codes. So the attendant has to run back and forth basically checking out for these people. - people who go to the smaller self-checkouts (i.e. the ones with two bagging slots) with a cart full of shit. They’ll fill two bags, take them off of the stand (not realizing it has a scale,) the SCO will bitch about that, so the attendant has to keep coming by to key in overrides. - people who think it’s oh-so-precious to let their darling 4-year-old scan the items. Of course, the kid’s too young to understand what part of the package needs to be pointed where, and keeps dropping items, and keeps sitting/leaning on the bagging platform thus causing the station to complain. I’ve noticed that these people frequently are the ones with full shopping carts. - there’s labels all over the fucking SCO saying you can’t use WIC, EBT, or bridge cards at them, you have to go to a normal lane. So don’t scan all of your shit, then tie the attendant up because you’re illiterate or licktarded and trying to use your bridge card. and yes, lazy assfucks leaving their carts wherever the hell they feel like. the “best” was when I was leaving Meijer; I was in my (running) car with it in reverse, and this whale of a bint who had just finished loading her car a few spaces down decided she only wanted to take 10 steps and left her cart behind my car. My running car with the reverse lights on. I jumped out, grabbed the cart, stormed past her and shoved it in the corral. She pretended not to hear me when I snarled “was that so damn hard?” ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/195 "2012-04-08T19:48:21Z")
Ok, but in Safeway, when you put their very own supplied right there paper bag down, it freezes and says _“unexpected item in the bagging area”_. Riiight. A **bag** , in the **bag** ging area is unexpected.:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![LeeshaJoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e8cbc/32.png) [@LeeshaJoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LeeshaJoy)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/196 "2012-04-08T19:59:13Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Ok, but in Safeway, when you put their very own supplied right there paper bag down, it freezes and says _“unexpected item in the bagging area”_. Riiight. A **bag** , in the **bag** ging area is unexpected.:rolleyes: And right there on the screen is a button that says “I’m using my own bag.” :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/197 "2012-04-08T20:08:19Z")
> [@LeeshaJoy](#): > > And right there on the screen is a button that says “I’m using my own bag.” :dubious: “when you put\* their very own supplied right there paper bag\* down”. Thus, ipso facto, I am not _"using my own bag_". ---
**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Imp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58956e/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Imp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Imp)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 8:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/198 "2012-04-09T08:43:23Z")
> [@akennett](#): > > Then you need to have another plan for getting the cart to the corral, where it belongs. If you can’t do that, then you need to find some other way to get your groceries. Our local supermarket has parent and child spaces, with extra wide room so you can get the carseat/stroller in and out. Great! The only problem is, the nearest cart corral is at least two aisles of spaces away from them. So you get back with a full cart of shopping and your baby, unload it all into the car, then abandon your car with your baby inside while you walk a not insubstantial distance away to return your trolley? Umm, no. I do try to be as considerate as possible - there’s a covered walkway alongside the parent spaces that even when you ditch your trolley there, still has room for another trolley to pass, and yes, the workers seem to patrol it regularly to collect our abandoned carts, but hey, if they’d actually put a corral nearby I wouldn’t have to do it in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 9:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/199 "2012-04-09T09:22:29Z")
> [@UntouchedTakeaway](#): > > I have a theory on the “change piled on top of the bills” thing. > > Cumbersome, yes, but the change _always_ landed in the palm first, followed by the paper money. Now with these new-fangled ee-lectronic machines, the necessity to do all of this is gone and it’s just pile the change on top of the dollars. I put the change on top of the note to weigh it down. Believe it or not, I’ve had customers who apparently cannot close their hand on their change with managing to drop the notes, followed by a glare as though somehow I’m blame. Coins on top holds the note down so the apparent freakish localised gusts of wind can’t sweep the notes from those slow-hand-closing customers. It’s a deliberate choice to give them to you that way. It’s not that I’m too stupid to do basic mathematics without the register. ---
**Author:** ![aerodave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f08c70/32.png) [@aerodave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aerodave)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663/200 "2012-04-09T12:07:58Z")
> [@hermette](#): > > So you get back with a full cart of shopping and your baby, unload it all into the car, then abandon your car with your baby inside while you walk a not insubstantial distance away to return your trolley? Umm, no. Well I guess what I would do—fuck the hypothetical, what I _do_—is unload the groceries in the car, then wheel the cart and the baby over to the return. Leave the cart, keep the baby (make sure you don’t get that one backwards), and carry the baby back to the car. That is, unless you’re one of those parents who can’t seem to bear to carry their infant anywhere, no matter how short the distance. Everytime I see a pumpkin seat with a 20-plus-pound kid in it being carried into our daycare facility, I can only roll my eyes. Is a handle really worth an extra 10 lb of seat?! But this rant is quickly going on the wrong tangent. Judgmental? Who, me? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-grocery-shop-since-there-seems-to-be-some-confusion-a-rant/617663.md?page=11)