I use the sifter from the cat’s litter box. Metal, nice and sturdy. You just have to rinse it off before you put it back so it doesn’t get all gross.
Are you sure you have those steps in the proper order?
I just use tongs. Never been an issue. Stick one end in the cavity, the other along the top of the breastbone or the backbone, flip. (ETA: And, yes, I use the type of tongs bump linked to.)
Is there any order that would make you try that?
I would yell why? You might be imagining heavy dishwashing gloves, which isn’t what I’m talking about. I use a pair of up to the elbow thick black rubber gloves. I can’t feel any heat through those.
I read the first sentence and thought "I’m sure she means ‘I use A sifter LIKE the one from the cat’s litter box’
Nope.
So, dinner KFC then?
We have a pair of those super heave gloves at work, the ones you can reach into boiling water with. I tested it out once, yup, you can reach right into boiling water with them, can’t feel a thing. But, like waders, you’re really, really in trouble if you were to reach in too far and they fill up with (boiling) water.
Also, once day, I picked something up with them, dropped it right on the floor…happened three or four more times. Finally looked at everyone with a WTF look and said ‘uh…anyone wanna tell me why these gloves are all greasy?’. I don’t remember the exact reason, but someone had been handling something greasy with them…and I was the asshole for telling them they needed to wash them off afterwards. At least the things I dropped fell on the floor, but a heavy sheet pan right out of the oven, that could have landed on someone’s feet or legs, or (IMO worse) their forearms or torso of they tried to catch it as it fell.
Cut that fucker up. There’s no advantage to simmering the chicken whole.
Then use any sort of tongs.
I have a rotisserie attachment for my gas grill that’s pretty handy, but you’re right, it doesn’t significantly outperform a chicken stand, or for that matter, just roasting in the oven on a high temp like 500.
Admit it. You’re ken m., aren’t you?
Thanks everyone for the input! Looks like I’m going to have to invest in some kitchen utensils.
Yeah, that’ll happen pretty much with any chicken given enough time and a moist cooking environment. Slow cooker. Dutch oven. Hell, foiled chicken in the oven or on a grill. In that case, you do need to use the heavy gloves suggestion if you want to get it out reasonably in one piece. For chicken that is meant to be done to that sort of doneness level, I prefer, like Ukelele Ike mentions, to use chicken pieces rather than a whole chicken.
Love my Instant Pot!!
But when I need to handle a whole chicken, depending, I either use a colander appropriately, or a combination of tongs and my strainer spoon thingie.
Mostly, I just try not to have to handle a whole chicken. 
As far as picking off flesh, catch the chicken in a colander, let it cool for 1/2 hour or so, and have a bowl for meat, a bowl for bones, and your trash handy. Then you just gotta get in there with your bare hands and tear it up. The trick (for me) is not simmering too long so that the vertabrae and such are breaking up, but the flesh is tender.
There it is, my new word for the day. Apparently it mostly refers to cooking eels!
Who taught those eels how to cook?
A set of silicone (or silicone tipped/dipped) metal tongs, like the Oxo ones should be fine. Silicone isn’t going to melt and if it’s good quality it’s not going to bend under the weight of a 5lb bird being held for a few seconds. Also, how big is the pot you’re using. If it’s a big turkey roaster type thing, I agree with someone else, stick one part of the tong in the bird, pinch down and flip it (as I said before, I think you’re over thinking this) or just roll it over. It’ll be fine. Also, it just takes some practice, some confidence and a little getting over the fear of splattering yourself and making a mess.
But, besides, as I and others have said (and you found out), once it’s done enough, it’s going to fall apart anyways. Sort of makes flipping it moot.
As for the sanitary thing, unless the utensils are something I’m using constantly throughout the cooking process (like browning ground beef), I usually make sure that once the item is, more or less, cooked on the outside, I move to new utensils. The problem, for example in this case, is that you could use the tongs to sear all sides of the raw bird, set them aside and then at the end when you pull the bird out with the same tongs, you’re getting raw chicken on cooked chicken. (and then there’s the whole issue of the fact that even if that’s not that bad, you’re making it considerably worse when you don’t cool it fast enough and/or don’t reheat it properly for leftovers). Once you’re done touching it for a while, either washing them (or the gloves) or move over to new tongs/gloves. Keeps everything sanitary, but then, that’s the Food Safety Manager in me.
If it’s really stuck to the pan I use a mattock.
Wimp, I fire up the road construction rated air compressor and take the jack hammer to it. If the neighbors complain, well, I can always run over it with the 18 wheeler a few times. That’s usually enough persuasion (for both the bird and the neighbors).
I’ve heard that a few pounds of AMFO will usually loosen it, but I haven’t tried yet.
If nothing else, this thread is really expanding my vocabulary.
Joey P, the pot is 8 quarts. Or at least 8 quarts is its max capacity, as it’s a pressure cooker. So the pot fits the chicken just fine but it has tall sides.
I always use a plain large wooden spoon inserted into the cavity. Doesn’t bend, doesn’t break, doesn’t gouge the chicken. Works like a charm!