# How to respond to "I'll pray for you"? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 9, 2016, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216 "2016-08-09T03:44:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/61 "2016-08-09T18:03:12Z")
> [@Aspenglow](#): > > Oh, my goodness, you didn’t screw the pooch with me. You don’t know me and I don’t know you, and even if you knew me a little and offered your prayers, I’d reply with a genuine smile for your good wishes and simply thank you for your prayers. I may feel a bit dismayed at your assumption that I am religious, because my upbringing required me to keep such things private in the name of good manners and I wish everyone felt that way… but you’d never know these thoughts might pass through my brain. > > I have a couple of family members and one or two friends who are highly devoted to their religious beliefs. They have asked and I have responded about my own non-belief, so our difference in lifestyle credos is well known between us. That’s all fine. But when they then make a deliberate statement that they will pray for me – and I’m talking about a circumstance where they’ve obviously considered my views and have chosen to ignore them, rather than just a slip of their vernacular – then I will respond in a way that is equally dismissive of their views. That’s really it. > > But that’s not what the OP asked. He asked for ways to deal with people who were offering to pray for him in a casual setting after a spirited political discussion. I, too, would consider that offensive and I just gave him my best strategy. > > People who use their belief or non-belief as a weapon are always irritating. Now I think we’re completely on the same page. Thanks for the further clarification. And yes, militant anything is as annoying as hell. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/62 "2016-08-09T18:09:02Z")
“No thanks”. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/63 "2016-08-09T18:43:05Z")
Smile and say thanks. Walk away happily. _That_’ll piss 'em off! ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/64 "2016-08-09T21:57:28Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > Thanks for all the discussion, folks. > > I agree that the best idea is probably to ignore it, but I’m not sure I’m that mature or magnanimous. > > These are people who are not really friends - just acquaintances I see regularly at the gym. I’m don’t want to become enemies with them, but I’m not concerned if they never talk to me again. I suppose I should get some satisfaction out of being “the bigger man,” but on the other hand, I really find this behavior offensive, and like “someone is _wrong_ on the Internet,” I’m loathe to let it go. Find an older, Southern lady to teach you how to say “Well bless your heart” with just the proper level of condescension. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/65 "2016-08-09T22:01:34Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > I don’t share the political views of a lot of people at my gym. Often, when I get sucked into political discussions (I know, I know… stupid me), these people will end the conversation with “I’ll pray for you.” > > I’ve been letting it slide, but I find it pretty offensive. I know they think that this is a good thing - that they are going to show me the true and righteous path, but I really feel like responding with something like “Please don’t use your spells on me” or “thanks, and I’ll sacrifice a goat for you.” > > Any ideas on how to shut down this type of Evangelical claptrap? “Please don’t. Just wish me well.” ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/66 "2016-08-09T22:10:39Z")
“Thanks! I’ll make a sacrifice to the Divine Elder God in your honor.” Sent from my Nexus 5X using Tapatalk ---
**Author:** ![purplehearingaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@purplehearingaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehearingaid)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/67 "2016-08-09T22:24:06Z")
> [@drewder](#): > > Say thank you. It hardly seems worthy of going to war over and what makes you think their prayers are centered on converting the heathen rather than asking for God’s help and protection for you. Why should you be offended that someone wants good things for you? I get very offended when people say they pray for me b/c I don’t believe in JC ! I don’t even want people to pray for me when I drop dead and told my daughter and SIL this ! ---
**Author:** ![spamforbrains](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@spamforbrains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spamforbrains)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/68 "2016-08-09T22:25:36Z")
I stare blankly at them and walk away. Arguing with drunks and crazy people never has any good results. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/69 "2016-08-09T22:40:44Z")
> [@purplehearingaid](#): > > I get very offended when people say they pray for me b/c I don’t believe in JC ! Before we lost Johnny Cash, I had the pleasure of seeing him in concert. I believe in him, and I believe he died for my sins on September 12, 2003. ETA: I’m walking the line, JC! ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/70 "2016-08-09T23:36:47Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > “No thanks”. 🙂 Over the years I’ve had quite a few people tell me they were going to pray for me. It’s _always_ in the context of praying for me to walk again. Offensive as fuck but I’m never rude or insulting. I just say no thanks and smile. My life does _not_ need prayer. Im doing just fine, k? Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2016, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/71 "2016-08-09T23:49:44Z")
I know exactly the way you mean what you say it. It’s said as a threat, not an act of kindness. They’re praying for you to change to their way of thinking, not for any good fortune to befall you. They’re being catty, not kind. I usually just let it go, but I’ll go measure for measure sometimes if I’m in the mood. I might respond with, “Instead of praying I’ll start being homophobic like you, why not pray for something useful like for God to stop the next hurricane, or how about a cure for cancer?” Or “Why not pray to got to heal you from being such a twat?” I know, I’m being just as bad as them, right? But it feels good sometimes just to see the look on their face. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2016, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/72 "2016-08-10T00:12:33Z")
If someone said that to me in a such a condescending way, I’d probably say (under my breath) “And I won’t be giving you another thought.” ---
**Author:** ![Nars\_Glinley](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nars_glinley/32/8177_2.png) [@Nars\_Glinley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nars_Glinley)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2016, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/73 "2016-08-10T01:43:04Z")
As a Christian, I find it unconscionable that someone would say “I’ll pray for you to change your political views.” I don’t doubt it at all because I can hear my mother saying it but it’s offensive in the extreme. If I were the OP, I wouldn’t be able to resist a sarcastic reply. Probably something along the lines of “For a small donation, I will pretend to agree with you.” ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2016, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/74 "2016-08-10T01:50:03Z")
> [@Nars\_Glinley](#): > > As a Christian, I find it unconscionable that someone would say “I’ll pray for you to change your political views.” I don’t doubt it at all because I can hear my mother saying it but it’s offensive in the extreme. If I were the OP, I wouldn’t be able to resist a sarcastic reply. Probably something along the lines of “For a small donation, I will pretend to agree with you.” That’s a fantastic response because it’s snarky but not really a direct attack on the person’s religion. ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2016, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/75 "2016-08-10T02:51:25Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > I don’t share the political views of a lot of people at my gym. Often, when I get sucked into political discussions (I know, I know… stupid me), these people will end the conversation with “I’ll pray for you.” > > I’ve been letting it slide, but I find it pretty offensive. I know they think that this is a good thing - that they are going to show me the true and righteous path, but I really feel like responding with something like “Please don’t use your spells on me” or “thanks, and I’ll sacrifice a goat for you.” > > Any ideas on how to shut down this type of Evangelical claptrap? If it’s the results of a political discussion then thank them with the caveat that you’ll be praying for your candidate so it’ll be a two-fer. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2016, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/76 "2016-08-10T04:00:30Z")
Make sure you pray to the right Deity this time because the cancer is getting worse. If you really want to be snarky to your gym colleagues say ‘thanks, I’ll read a book for you’ ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2016, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/77 "2016-08-10T04:26:54Z")
“I’ll pray for you.” “Please do. Every day and every night for the rest of your life.” ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2016, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/78 "2016-08-10T06:12:07Z")
“Even better, pray to God for the winning lottery numbers.” ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2016, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/79 "2016-08-10T07:16:49Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > Thanks for all the discussion, folks. > > I agree that the best idea is probably to ignore it, but I’m not sure I’m that mature or magnanimous. > > These are people who are not really friends - just acquaintances I see regularly at the gym. I’m don’t want to become enemies with them, but I’m not concerned if they never talk to me again. I suppose I should get some satisfaction out of being “the bigger man,” but on the other hand, I really find this behavior offensive, and like “someone is _wrong_ on the Internet,” I’m loathe to let it go. Maybe explore this with one of the more rational ones. Ask, in the most non-judgemental tone you can muster: I’m sorry, I’m not sure what you mean by that. Can you explain it to me? Giving them the benefit of the doubt, perhaps you are misunderstanding something. If they insist on praying to change your political position, just say: I’m sorry, i’m just not a religious person. Feel free to pray for me if you really want to, but it’s not something that interests me at all. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2016, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216/80 "2016-08-10T07:56:58Z")
“I will pray for you” “Thank you. I will think for you.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-respond-to-ill-pray-for-you/762216.md?page=5)