# How to Speak Squirrel **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 10, 2012, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395 "2012-04-10T18:48:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/1 "2012-04-10T18:48:29Z")
[Washington Post link may require registration, but is free.] [The “Squirrel Whisperer” on How to Speak Squirrel](http://www.washingtonpost.com/local/learn-to-speak-squirrel-in-four-easy-lessons/2012/04/09/gIQAV8Jr6S_story.html?hpid=z5) As so often seems to be the case, the reporter seems surprised squirrels are acting purposefully and commuicating. [QUOTE=Excerpted from full article] What we may hear as nonsensical chattering the Auburn University biology professor perceives as the back and forth of squirrels communicating with one another — and with other animals, as well. [/QUOTE] > [@](#): > > Squirrels are discerning, too. How are they able to distinguish between a harmless rabbit and a threatening cat, even from a perch high in the trees? > > “It’s a pretty complex question,” Lishak said, and one he’s trying to answer. My favorite nugget from the article: squirrels apparently talk smack to predators. We’ve always referred to that as “scolding,” but that may be close to the truth. A primer on squirrel sounds: > [@](#): > > Biologist Robert Lishak has spent countless hours in the field recording the sounds squirrels make. Here are the four main squirrel vocalizations. > > [ul] > [li]Kuk: A cry of alarm aimed at a specific predator.[/li] > [li]Quaa: A generalized alarm call when the threat has diminished somewhat.[/li] > [li]Quaa moan: A call voiced when the predator has started moving away.[/li] > [li]Muk-muk: Both a sound that baby squirrels make when they want to nurse and male squirrels make when they want to mate.[/li][/ul] ---
**Author:** ![ducati](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cc9497/32.png) [@ducati](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ducati)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/2 "2012-04-10T19:10:53Z")
Muk Muk will be my new slogan. I want both all the time.😛 ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/3 "2012-04-10T19:12:17Z")
Which of the squirrel vocalizations would a squirrel caught in a trap be likely to make? The squirrels that the critter guys trapped from our porch roof were definitely vocalizing when we would come near the trap, but I would have described the sound as more of a grunt than sounding like any of those descriptions. I’m pretty sure we can rule out muk-muk, but I’m wondering which of the other three it would have been. ETA: It was a humane live trap, so the squirrels were probably scared but not in pain. They moved around in there, apparently looking for a way out, a lot. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2012, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/4 "2012-04-10T19:30:44Z")
> [@Anne\_Neville](#): > > The squirrels that the critter guys trapped from our porch roof were definitely vocalizing when we would come near the trap, but I would have described the sound as more of a grunt than sounding like any of those descriptions. I’m pretty sure we can rule out muk-muk, but I’m wondering which of the other three it would have been. Maybe the “damyu” sound? Was it accompanied by tiny fist shaking? ---
**Author:** ![KRC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/45deac/32.png) [@KRC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KRC)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/5 "2012-04-12T13:56:51Z")
Based on what I’ve observed of gray tree squirrels, they’ve probably got a vocalization for “Give us the peanut butter sandwich and no one gets hurt.” ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/6 "2012-04-12T14:23:00Z")
I am reminded of Kronk [talking to the squirrels](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MNllfr6wVY) in “The Emperor’s New Groove”. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/7 "2012-04-12T16:38:25Z")
To drive that home,” Lishak said, the male squirrel “produces the same solicitation call that babies give. It means: ‘Don’t fear me. I’m just looking to copulate.’ ” I’ve tried that line in a bar many times. I quickly got labeled “NICE squirrel guy” ☹ ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/8 "2012-04-12T16:47:26Z")
The squirrels on my campus/workplace are very bold. The other day, one went right up next to a student who was sitting on a long concrete block, apparently hoping for a snack. The student told him, “Dude, I don’t have anything for you.” I don’t think the message got through. He said it in Human English. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/9 "2012-04-12T16:47:42Z")
Dang nab it. Noticed that the pickup line was the next line in the article. Duh. ---
**Author:** ![florez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b9e5f3/32.png) [@florez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/florez)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/10 "2012-04-12T17:18:57Z")
> [@Sailboat](#): > > [ > My favorite nugget from the article: squirrels apparently talk smack to predators. We’ve always referred to that as “scolding,” but that may be close to the truth. > : My SO and I are big forest hikers, and we always noticed the vigilance and chatter of the squirrels. Now we can try to differentiate between the sounds, with a little more information to go by. Thanks for sharing this. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/11 "2012-04-12T18:20:20Z")
I guess that means that “Muk” is the squirrel word for breast. Does he know the squirrel word for “big”? ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/12 "2012-04-12T19:51:58Z")
> [@Spiderman](#): > > I guess that means that “Muk” is the squirrel word for breast. Does he know the squirrel word for “big”? “MUK”. Hence the simple declarative sentence, “MUK muk”. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2012, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/13 "2012-04-12T22:33:55Z")
Human who has read this article, to squirrel: “Muk muk.” Squirrel: “CHEE chee chee chee chee” Translation: If you try to have sex with me, pervert human, I will bite your nuts off! ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2012, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/14 "2012-04-13T02:10:10Z")
What a breakthrough! Now at last, we can have squirrel sitcoms! Boy and girl squirrels sitting in a tree. A cat approaches. Boy: Kuk! Kuk! Cat sits and watches them for awhile, then looks away. Boy: Quaa! Cat finally walks off. Boy: Quaa Moan. Short pause. Boy: Muk Muk? Girl: Kuk! Kuk! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2012, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/15 "2012-04-13T02:26:24Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > I am reminded of Kronk [talking to the squirrels](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MNllfr6wVY) in “The Emperor’s New Groove”. 🙂 I was going to make a joke about how the first step of speaking to a squirrel was asking Ezma to give you little privacy. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2012, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/16 "2012-04-13T04:11:45Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > “MUK”. > Hence the simple declarative sentence, “MUK muk”. Nah. We humans use an ‘s’ to pluralize words & adjectives to further define them. We don’t say “muk muk”, “boob boob”, or “tit tit” but things like “big boobs” or “nice tits” - not repeating the same word twice to further describe it. Given I’ve met some humans who have the intelligence level of the average squirrel, perhaps even slightly less, I thought they’d do the same thing. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2012, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/17 "2012-04-13T05:56:50Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > I am reminded of Kronk [talking to the squirrels](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MNllfr6wVY) in “The Emperor’s New Groove”. 🙂 I am reminded of prairie dogs talking smack about Alan Davies on [QI](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cau_3_AFMbU). ---
**Author:** ![Arabella\_Flynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@Arabella\_Flynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arabella_Flynn)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2012, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/18 "2012-04-13T21:57:16Z")
The squirrels in the park here seem to chitter (make that crunchy/bruxing noise with their teeth). I assumed it meant the same as it does when my pet rats do it: “You brought me food! You’re so nice! Hand it over.” Frequently they do it after climbing up on to the bench beside me and plonking down about six inches away to stare. Park squirrels are amazingly tame, however. I’m not about to try it for real, but I give about even odds I could pet one of the little boogers if I gave him a french fry first. They may speak a different dialect than their wild cousins. ---
**Author:** ![Arabella\_Flynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8491ac/32.png) [@Arabella\_Flynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arabella_Flynn)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2012, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-speak-squirrel/618395/19 "2012-04-13T22:02:15Z")
The squirrels in the park here seem to chitter (make that crunchy/bruxing noise with their teeth). I assumed it meant the same as it does when my pet rats do it: “You brought me food! You’re so nice! Hand it over.” Frequently they start right after climbing up on to the bench beside me and plonking down about six inches away to stare. Park squirrels are amazingly tame, however. I’m not about to try it for real, but I give about even odds I could pet one of the little boogers if I gave him a french fry first. They may just have learned that staring and chittering strikes humans as feedably cute. (Obligatory photos of abovementioned pets: [http://4rats1bag.tumblr.com/](http://4rats1bag.tumblr.com/) ) edit: Ack! double post!