# How To Stop Evil Co-Worker **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 22, 2012, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512 "2012-03-22T16:36:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/21 "2012-03-22T19:13:19Z")
Wooden stake. Mallet. Enough said. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/22 "2012-03-22T19:51:38Z")
> [@Dallas\_Jones](#): > > Be aware. She may be gleaning these bits of information by following you and your fellow workers on Facebook and other social media. > > This next part makes it almost certain that she is doing so, with the support of your boss. > > **DMark** , if you are posting from work they almost certainly know that you are accessing this site and can fugure out who you are, just by spending a little time reading. You, and all of your fellow workers should cease all social media posting through your company servers. I think you’re being a little paranoid. I’ll bet you’re having a bad day. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/23 "2012-03-22T20:21:19Z")
I’d go all Tonya Harding on her. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/24 "2012-03-22T20:26:08Z")
> [@PacifistPorcupine](#): > > Do you really want to work in a place where the President gives so much credence to such a person? The OP works in the White House? ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/25 "2012-03-22T20:32:16Z")
> [@Dallas\_Jones](#): > > **DMark** , if you are posting from work they almost certainly know that you are accessing this site and can fugure out who you are, just by spending a little time reading. You, and all of your fellow workers should cease all social media posting through your company servers. Yeah. Almost no company does that. No one is checking where you go on the web or following your Facebook posts in any official capacity. > [@Bob Ducca](#): > > Seriously though DMark, why are you in such a bad mood? Perhaps a case of the “Mondays”. I suggest that the OP figure out how to work with annoying or difficult people. It’s not like there is some jerk-free company out there. And if you think your’s is jerk free, chances are the “jerk” is YOU! ---
**Author:** ![Lazlo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lazlo/32/9678_2.png) [@Lazlo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lazlo)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/26 "2012-03-22T20:33:47Z")
Become one of her minions. Kowtow often. And find another job post haste. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/27 "2012-03-22T21:08:31Z")
Read Snakes and Suits and the Sociopath Next Door. ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/28 "2012-03-22T21:09:04Z")
Feed her misinformation, nothing big, just things that are wrong, or wholeheartedly agree with her psychic visions, then when they get back to you, wink and say “I told Ms. Backstabber that, she believes anything.” ---
**Author:** ![Elysian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c77e96/32.png) [@Elysian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elysian)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/29 "2012-03-22T21:39:01Z")
How about being honest with people instead of defensive. If someone comes to you and says, “Are you okay?” roll your eyes and say, “You must have been talking to Ms Evil. Yeah, she likes to make things up sometimes, makes her boring life exciting. Be careful what you say around her.” Try to be casual and humourous, not angry and accusatory. Or you can do the hush hush leaning thing (“Yeah, did you know she makes stuff up all the time? Crazy, huh?”) ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Lowry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Sam\_Lowry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Lowry)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/30 "2012-03-22T22:20:22Z")
Could you treat her like she’s always joking? If she tells her latest rumor, say “you are so funny, how do you come up with these crazy things?” And do the same if someone tells you what she said, just laugh and talk about some of the other crazy jokes she told. It might not change her behavior but maybe you’ll feel better. ---
**Author:** ![Pai325](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Pai325](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pai325)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2012, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/31 "2012-03-22T23:37:29Z")
> [@Crafter\_Man](#): > > Stopping it? There is nothing you can do to stop it without incurring a lot of risk on your part. You basically have two choices: > > 1. Be careful, stay quiet, and keep your back against the wall. > 2. Find another job. Yes. In my case, the big boss left for another job and took the coworker along. You’re probably not going to be that fortunate. ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2012, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/32 "2012-03-23T00:21:47Z")
Have you gone to your immediate boss about it? “X is making up some bizarre stories, and I’m afraid, that with the medication she’s on, she may perpetrate some act of violence up here at work. I’m sending a note to HR about it, and I was wondering if you need to be cc’d.” ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2012, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/33 "2012-03-23T00:58:01Z")
I’ve dealt with a nut like this before. I found what helped was to change the topic, keep it trivial (stuff shes not interested in even better). Never reveal anything personal to them and try to avoid them as much as possible. When I did have to talk to this nutbar, I always talked a little louder than normal. This had two affects. One she thought I was a little odd I believed which didn’t make it fun for her, second people around me heard the conversation. In your situation I would of dealt with the “Oh my, you are in a bad mood today - take a breath, don’t let this work situation get to you.” “Nah I’m fine, HEY DID YOU CATCH THAT HOCKEY GAME LAST NIGHT FREAKN’ AWESOME.” Second, cover your ass. Ask your supervisor if you can send him/her updates on your work progress and email once a week sort of thing, bc yourself. That way if she goes full on retard on you and gets to the CEO, he goes to your supervisor. He checks the emails, and says “hell no, there’s no problems with\*\* DMark\*\*” Third, if you can get out of there do so. I hate to say it but find an office where there are more men than women. Less bullshit majority of the time. ---
**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2012, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/34 "2012-03-23T02:00:23Z")
I hafta tell ya, **Ibanez** , that thing about men being less bullshit is so not true in my experience. I don’t think either gender has a lock on nutbardom, but almost all the gossipy, career destroying, high drama, manipulative, duplicitious wingnuts I’ve come across in twenty-plus years of work have been men. ---
**Author:** ![MichaelEmouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/michaelemouse/32/101_2.png) [@MichaelEmouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MichaelEmouse)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2012, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/35 "2012-03-23T02:12:49Z")
> [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](#): > > I hafta tell ya, **Ibanez** , that thing about men being less bullshit is so not true in my experience. I don’t think either gender has a lock on nutbardom, but almost all the gossipy, career destroying, high drama, manipulative, duplicitious wingnuts I’ve come across in twenty-plus years of work have been men. Mind if I ask what industry you work in and if your workplaces were majority men? Not to say that isn’t the case. In my experience, however, male jerks tend to be more upfront and domineering in their assholesness whereas female jerks are more underhanded. Remember high school? Male and female bullies didn’t tend to have the same main M.O. ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2012, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/36 "2012-03-23T02:13:54Z")
> [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](#): > > I hafta tell ya, **Ibanez** , that thing about men being less bullshit is so not true in my experience. I don’t think either gender has a lock on nutbardom, but almost all the gossipy, career destroying, high drama, manipulative, duplicitious wingnuts I’ve come across in twenty-plus years of work have been men. Didn’t mean to generalize, but my experience has been the opposite of yours. But your right both sexes have their fare share of kooks. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2012, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/37 "2012-03-23T02:14:10Z")
What can I say that others haven’t? Phone call to an Anon Ethics Hotline? Stills of her & president emailed to president’s wife / Chairman of Board via a throw-away Gmail account? Shame there aren’t any employees with MDs on board. Penny’s worth of ink from 3 would do nicely. ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2012, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/38 "2012-03-23T02:29:11Z")
Thank you all for the great (and sometimes bizarre) suggestions! Her “pychic” attempts do not come from Facebook or from any source of info - stuff just pops out of her head. She will say, “I can tell you’re a dog person…” and that person will say, “No, I have six cats…” and she will say, “I knew you liked pets…” etc. She is NEVER wrong, and will twist her great insight until she hits a nail on the head or at least convinces you she knows more about you than you think. Many idiots fall for this age-old con game tactic and really think she knows “stuff”. She loves to give helpful suggestions like, “Be careful what you say around Bob, I can tell he is watching what you are doing and he is good friends with Jackie in Human Resources.” Most likely Bob has never even noticed that person and has never heard of Jackie in Human Resources, but now the seed of thought has been planted and Bob becomes suspect. See how this is going? This has been going on for some time, but only recently have I started putting two and two together to see how she is doing this. I feel fairly safe, in that my work is crucial to her work and she is not stupid enough to want to screw with me. She knows I could make her life a bit difficult (before she would probably eventually win and get me fired). I am just trying to find the right approach to defuse her power, and a couple of your suggestions above are quite clever. So, whild I continue to mull over the options, please feel free to add any suggestiong, tips, personal experience with situations like this. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2012, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/39 "2012-03-23T02:32:10Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Yeah. Almost no company does that. **No one is checking where you go on the web or following your Facebook posts in any official capacity.** Well, THAT may not be true, if we can believe what I posted here: > **[Employers now demanding job applicants Facebook passwords](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=646034)** > > Not sure if this belongs in IMHO or Great Debates or even The Pit (for starters anyway). Saw this article yesterday (3/21/2012). So now job interviewers are asking applicants for their Facebook passwords so they can go trolling through their stuff.... ---
**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2012, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512/40 "2012-03-23T02:36:29Z")
> [@MichaelEmouse](#): > > Mind if I ask what industry you work in and if your workplaces were majority men? > > Not to say that isn’t the case. In my experience, however, male jerks tend to be more upfront and domineering in their assholesness whereas female jerks are more underhanded. Remember high school? Male and female bullies didn’t tend to have the same main M.O. Well, like I said, neither gender has the corner on crazy. I don’t agree that there is de facto less bullshit in a workplace that has fewer women. I’ve worked in several industries in my adulthood and there were crazies of both genders, but from a straight-up tallying of the numbers, the majority of the crazies I’ve run across were men. I’m sure others have a different experience, God help us all. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-to-stop-evil-co-worker/616512.md?page=3)