How to tell them apart (a public service)

Messian Concert: Two agonizing hours of atonal music

** The Messiah**:That really pretty thing they always play at Christmastime where everyone stands and sings “Hallelujah”. Alternately described as an oratorio written by Handel.

Credit for this comparison is due to Judith Arnold, whose book Love in Bloom’s I was reading when I discovered it.

George Freidrich Handel: Composer of * The Messiah* described above.

Handle: the portion of an object which is intended to be grasped.

*** The Messiah*** : An oratorio written by Handel.

** the messiah, according to Christians**: Jesus of Nazareth.

John Carter, M.D., fictional character on NBC’s hit drama ER.

John Carter Of Mars a valued Doper and story teller. Likes Bubba’s honey.

John Constantine Either an Englishman from Newcastle, based in London, who defeats demons with a few confidence tricks, or a Yank who kills demons with a cross-shaped gun :rolleyes:

E/R–1984 TV show that starred George Clooney as a doctor.
ER—1994 TV show that starred George Clooney as a doctor.

Andy Kaufman: Comedian from the late 1970s. Latka on “Taxi”.

Shirley Ujest writes:

> John Wayne The American Cowboy/Patriot actor. Never served in the US
> Military, only played one on the screen. Won his only oscar for Rooster
> Cogburn & his Lady. Dead

He won an Oscar for True Grit. Rooster Cogburn and the Lady was a sequel to that film.

> There are a bunch of serial killers who seem to have the middle name of either
> Lee or Wayne. I’m just drawning a blank right now at 3am.

The column News of the Weird (which, here in Washington, runs in the alternative paper just like The Straight Dope does) has a running feature about men arrested or convicted of murder with the middle name of Wayne.

Henry Lee Lucas–serial killer.
Jerry Lee Lewis–The Killer.

Professor MARVEL never guesses. He knows!

faze – verb only: to bother or disconcert. Always refers to people. Used in the construction “That doesn’t faze him,” and rarely otherwise.
phase – as a verb: to carry out systematically; to synchronize. Rarely refers to people. Never correct in the construction “That doesn’t phase him.”

Red Green – Member of Possum Lodge. Alive but fictional.

Alice Cooper – Owner of
Neko. Female.

The “Marvel” list left out Marvel Girl, founding member of the X-Men who would eventually realize that “Marvel Girl” is a dumb superhero name and just go by her real name, Jean Grey.

The “Red” list has left out Red Fox, star of Sanford and Son, Red Forman, the father on That '70s Show, and Redrum, a phrase you don’t want to find your little boy mumbling to himself over and over…
Automatic Weapon - load the weapon. Chamber a round. Pull the trigger and you’ve got shot after shot hosing out toward your target until you’re out of bullets or you let go of the trigger. Sometimes can be referred to as a “submachine gun”, depending on the weapon.

Semi-Automatic Weapon - load the weapon. Chamber a round. Pull the trigger and you’ve fired one shot and only one shot. The next bullet is automatically loaded into the chamber but you’ve gotta pull the trigger again to fire it. Not a “submachine gun” by any means.

There’s also Marvel Boy, a more minor telepath/telekinetic, his name presumably based on Jean’s.
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there’s a Manhattan Beach in NYC too! It’s on the east end of the same peninsula that Coney Island (which isn’t actually an island) and Brighton Beach are on.
Most people don’t know or care, but there are many different types of rolling stock in the NYC subway system that look identical, but are actually different models, often made by different companies:

seen on the A, C, E, F:
R-32 - Manufactured by Budd, the grooves on the outer walls go all the way to the roof
R-38 - Manufactured by St Louis Car Company, the grooves only go up halfway on the outer walls

seen on the A, F, G, R, V, SIRT:
R-44 - Manufactured by St Louis Car Company, has glass windows on armrests for seats near doors, has a tiny cab door, has ugly marks on outer walls from when a blue stripe used to be
R-46 - Manufactured by Pullman Standard - fullsized cab doors, nothing on armrests near doors

seen on the 1, 3, 4, 7, 9, Shuttle:
R-62 - Manufactured by Kawasaki - cabs are full width, rollsign destinations are written in one line
R-62a - Manufactured by Bombardier - cabs are half width (so they have end windows), rollsigns are two lines

  • these two types of trains are often mixed together in the same set

seen on the D, N, Q:
R-68 - Manufactured by Amrail - floors are yellowish, door to cab hinges open
R-68a - Manufactured by Kawasaki - floors are greyish, door to cab slides open
seen on the 2, 4, 5, 6
R-142 - Manufactured by Bombardier - exterior signs are LED-based (words will disappear for a second before new words appear), interior speakers have panels
R-142a - Manufactured by Kawasaki - exterior signs are LCD-based (no delay when changing words), interior speakers built into ceiling

  • the 142 and 142a also have significantly different advertisement panel layouts, but it’s harder to explain here without linking to photos

  • the R-143, which is found on the L & M, is nearly identical in appearance to the R-142a, but will never been seen on a numbered line (just as the 142/142a will never be seen on a lettered line). The other easy way to tell the difference between the 142 and 143 is that the 143 uses orange instead of green for the exterior signs

on a related note, I can’t believe how many times I get asked (mostly by tourists) if the 4 and 5 train are the same or not, as well as witness tourists just assuming they’re the same. They’re ONLY the same in Manhattan:

4 - goes to Woodlawn in the Bronx and Utica in Brooklyn. Only Lex line that passes Yankee Stadium
5 - goes to Wakefield in the Bronx and Brooklyn College. Only Lex line that passes Bronx Zoo.

oh, and speaking of NYC:

East Village - the block of area in Manhattan made by 14 St, Houston St, Broadway, and the East River. Home to NYU and many post-grads/slackers/hippies

Lower East Side - below the East Village, separated by Houston St, East River (both east and south) and Broadway. Commonly (but wrongfully) refered to as SoHo - the actual SoHo neighborhood is on the west side of Broadway. Similar to East Village, but less trendy and with an older crowd, also home to the Williamsburgh Bridge

** Upper East Side ** - the block in Manhattan made by 100 St, 59 St, Central Park East, and the East River. You can’t afford it.

** East New York ** - the lower east corner of Brooklyn, near JFK airport. You can afford it, but due to the highest violent crime rates in all of NYC, you still can’t afford to live there

** East River** - the water that separates the east side of Manhattan with the west coasts of Queens & Brooklyn

and just for clarity’s sake:

Hudson River - the water that separates the west side of Manhattan & The Bronx with New Jersey

** Harlem River ** - the water that separates the north coast of Manhattan with the south coast of The Bronx. Unlike the East and Hudson rivers, you can actually hop, skip and jump over this river with relative ease

** Newtown Creek ** - separates south border of Queens (Long Island City specifically) with north border of Brooklyn (Greenpoint)

theology: up

geology: down

I don’t think so. A plushie is someone who’s attracted to plush animals. Although I suppose you could be a furry and a plushie if you were attracted to the San Diego Chicken.

I thought it was

Bronx: up

Battery: down

Exactly. That’s what most fursuits are - plush animals with people inside them.

New York City Bridges and Tunnels:

Brooklyn Bridge–connects Brooklyn to Wall Street area.
Brooklyn-Battery Tunnel–connects Brooklyn to the Wall Street area
George Washington Bridge–known as the “GWB,” connects the Bronx to Fort Lee, NJ. Holland Tunnel.–connects Downtown Manhattan to Hoboken, NJ.
Lincoln Tunnel.–connects midtown Manhattan to Weehawken, NJ,
Manhattan Bridge– connects Brooklyn to Downtown Manhattan.
Queensboro Bridge.–connects Queens to Midtown Manhattan.
Queens-Midtown Tunnel.– connects Queens to Midtown Manhattan.
Verrazzano Narrows Bridge–connects Fort Hamilton, Brooklyn to Staten Island.
Williamsburg Bridge. --connects Brooklyn to Downtown Manhattan.
145th Street Bridge– Connects 145th Street in Manhattan to 149th Street and River Avenue in the Bronx.
3rd Avenue Bridge.–connects North Manhattan to the South Bronx.
Alexander Hamilton Bridge–Connects the Manhattan Expressway to the Cross Bronx Expressway.
Broadway Bridge–Connects Broadway past 220th Street in Manhattan to Broadway south of 225th Street in the Bronx.
Bronx-Whitestone Bridge–connects North Queens to the Bronx.
Cross Bay Veterans Memorial Bridge–connects to.Rockaway Peninsula
Gil Hodges Memorial Bridge–. connects to.Rockaway Peninsula
Henry Hudson Bridge.–connects North Manhattan to the Bronx.
High Bridge–the first bridge to connect the island of Manhattan with the mainland, and though closed to traffic, continues to carry water from Upstate reservoirs.
Macombs Dam Bridge.–Connects 155th Street in Manhattan to 161st and Jerome Avenue in the Bronx.
Madison Avenue Bridge– Connects 138th Street in Manhattan to 138th Street in the Bronx.
Throgs Neck Bridge–. It connects many major highways in North Queens and the Bronx.
Triborough Bridge.-- Actually a complex of three bridges - it connects North Manhattan, North Queens and the Bronx.
University Bridge–. Connects 207th Street in Manhattan to Fordham Road in the Bronx.
Washington Bridge.-- Connects 181st Street in Manhattan to Dr. Martin Luther King Boulevard (University Avenue) and Edward L. Grant Highway in the Bronx.
Willis Avenue Bridge– Connects 125th Street in Manhattan to Willis Avenue and Bruckner Boulevard in the Bronx. More info.
Bayonne Bridge.-- connects Port Richmond, Staten Island to Bayonne, NJ.
Goethals Bridge.–connects Staten Island to Elizabeth, NJ. $4 from NJ to Staten Island.
Outerbridge–links Perth Amboy, NJ with the Tottenville section of Staten Island.